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Page 37 text:
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arm punchesg but Entellus wuz dead 'next to d' science, an' didn't even counter. All of a sudden Entellus tried d' pivot blow. Say ! It wuz a terror t' Wildcats! But Dares sidestepped an' Entellus fanned the air. W'y, he swung so hard dat wien he missed he landed in d' ropes! Datis right. Dat miss put Entellus in a luvly grouch, an' he sailed into Dares an' didn't do a t'ing! Oh, no! Say, he cleaned Dares' clock good and proper! He swatted him around d' ring, an' gave him d' solar plexus an' a headache till d' referee parted 'em, an' Dares tirew up d' sponge! f as ' al I A .4 fb , 1-.l - - , 1 L 5 4 ' ' . A ' fXf gel L Mb M W 4 - WFS -.- g Y iL,,,,,.fr.fiY V lf Y A , Ju ! .Qd9X.y' iY?z:? 5'xx A 7 Yjltg Y L - A ,, i,4.,f- .-.g ,.,:,, ,- ..- f Efmx jf xxcwgs , 1' --. Arirf 5 -Trl 'L P' - gas. gs , -sc y X rWi w'e'r ' ef-if . g ri m a ,r,A,,a..,Mfa e B . P . r '?'A7 ' L -,- ffdfffiimi 3 .. 1 I 'TSA ' wr 5 ' lflfllflfllll Y - f i . i pf in U I ' ,ff 5 .-T . ff ' f ' f S , ' H W ' 5 -:gf N , If ' I ' s s f s g ' .- 'e ,.......n jg ' ' , 1 - -ff- -J 1 a ' , 4 'a . , 34315225 1 6 fi' X , . . f 5' 'V Q 3 - umrr Entel1us was dead next to d' science. -Den dey had a shootin' match wid bows an' arrows, an' it wuz a summer game, an' no mistake! W'y, Dink, I wouldn't be seen dead shootin' a bowan' arrow! Itls as bad as an air-gun! D' handicap didn't work right, either, for th' fellie wot pulled in first money at A hundred-to-one shot didn't hit the bullseye at all, but he fixed his arrow wid a match an, some turpentine so it burned up in de air, an' d' farmers in Sicily t'ought dat a gent wot could work that kind of a con game must be about 4-11-44. An' he cert'ny wuz handy wid d' shells, for ZEneas himself couldn't spot dl phoney arrow, an' wuz taken in wid d' rest of 'em by dat amateur magician widout a license! D' last t'ing on d' program wuz a drill by Teddy Ascanius' Own Rough Riders,
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Page 36 text:
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skin game, an' went in too far an' hit d' rocks, an' little Willie wuz up against it an' out of d' game. But Iimsey hikes along, runnin' easy an' gettin' his second wind-he's a winner, he is!- an' takes first money, George gets second prize, Tommy, widout a pilot or a pleasant thought, gets third, an' Billy, he gets it in d' neck, fer his boat wuz as full of holes as a Filipino is of bad t'oughts. Then they had a runnin' race, a hundred yard dash, wid college yells an' colors. Two of d' runners wuz from d' same college, and dey worked in snucks. All of 'ern wuz ten-second men, an' at d' crack of d' pistol dey began to run like diamond dyes. One of d' ringers got d' start, den came a feller from another college, den th' other ringer, whose partner wuz first. D' cinder path wuz slippery an d' first man fell, but he knocked number two man oh' his pins, too, so his pal won d' race. D' second man kicked, an' said it wuz a fake race an' that he Wanted his money back, an' that the other feller wuz a profes- sional, anyhow. Nope, says Mr. Pineas, you can't kick on th' umpire's decision, but you had hard luck, so I'll give you a consolation prize on th' side. Then th' other bloke wot fell down said he wou1dn't play if he didn't get a prize. I tell yer, Dink, them fellers wanted th' earth, w'y, they couldnlt get a pleasant look nowadays if they tried tl work th' judges! Next came th' boxing match, wid seconds an' backers, an' side bets, an' kinetoscopes, an' reporters, an' all th' other neces- sary things. Wot? Oh, yes! There wuz two bruisers, too, I fergot 'em ! A feller called Dares fprob'bly because he wanted t' risk his neck in a nghtj held dl heavy-weight championship belt. Dares wuz a warm member, an' dere werenlt no challengers, till an old bloky called Entellus got up an' says, Oh, well, I don't care if I dog I'm kind of a has-been, but I think I can hold this teller fer a while, till he gets a reputation. So he puts on the mits, an' time is called. Entellus went easy at first, jes' on the defensive, an' Dares tried all the leads he knew, hooks an' jabs an' swings an' short-
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Page 38 text:
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giving de Great Original an' Only Genuine Representation of San Juan Hill. 4 Of course d' Spaniards an' Boers wuz licked and had t' trek their baggage over d' kopje to d' spotje w'ere d' victors said. But the grand finaly w'ich Wuzn't on the bill of fare, wuz a special exhibition of fire-works. Fer w'ile cl' men wuz at dis circus, an' d' women wuz - discussin' who wuz d' aut'or of David Harum, an'-w'y shirt waists was goin' out of style, d' ships got on Ere, but before de 'engines be- gan to play on de ruins of d' ships, an' d' ire lines wuz established, a big storm came up an' put it out, so d' game wuz called on ac- count of rain. Afterwards dey- left Sicily an' went to Italy. An' now, Dink, comes d' part' I don't like to speak- about. It's embarrassin'. Y' ought t' read it yerseli but you can't, an', as some feller said, If d' mountain won't come to Mahomet, w'y it's 'up to' Mahometj' so I'll explain. D' feller wot wrote d' story smoothed it over as much as he could, but de only way I can look at it is, dat in a moment of forgetfulness Eneas jes' common got loaded to d' brim, an' had a bad. case of d' willies, for he t'ought he went to d' f-1 M LET? Jes, common got loaded to d' brim.
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