Central Commercial Technical High School - Cog Pen Yearbook (Newark, NJ)

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it THE FRATECH LlIt'!ll1.Y of llvfclofviilg Pw'.r011r1I1'!y and Tart Most of us have found that enjoy- ment of life and suc- job are cess on the measured largely by our ability to get along easily with other people and to win their friendship and respect. Some of us are naturally inclined to be good ' - mixers. ln others, this ability must be cultivated. No doubt you have asked your- self: How do l rate learn to meet Iueople and make friends with them more readily ? Probably the biggest reason for our not hav- ing met with greater success in establishing social contacts and in making people like us, is that we have given little thought to the subject as a whole, and even less thought to the study of in- dividuals in particular. VVe make our contacts in a hit or miss fashion unmindful of the ulti- mate result. More often, we pass up altogether the opportunity of making a valuable social con- tact simply because of our mental laziness. Mak- ing a new social contact requires some mental exertion because, subconsciously, we try to make an impression on such an occasion. VVe are men- tally too inactive to be continually on the alert to study the likes and dislikes of the people we meet, to realize when to let the other fellow do the talking, to avoid making enemies, and to prevent or circumvent embarrassment to the other fel- low, or to know how and when to make a grace- ful retreat and accept the other fellow's opinion. A story is told about Theodore Roosevelt. who while attending a political banquet prior to the 1912 general election was confronted at the table by a cluster of strange faces. He realized that it was to his advantage to make friends of these people and he proceeded to do so. From amongst his intimate friends present, he learned some- thing about the likes and dislikes of these people as individuals. He then proceeded to fascinate them by having ready for each one a topic of con- MR. C. M. BEYER Instructor of Business Administration as a mixer. and how can l Tlzirly-si,r K SOCIAL CONTACTS versation that started them talking about them- selves. By one of the simplest of all methods, Roosevelt raised the ego of people who he wished to charm. Thus each one of these people left the table delighted and impressed. Roosevelt be- lieved that PEOPLE ARE ALL DIFFERENT AND MUST BE TREATED DIFFERENTLY. Of course, you might say that Roosevelt found little difhculty in selecting topics of conversation to fit each particular case because of his broad experiences 5 however, we can at least apply Roosevelt's method to our own contacts as far as our broadness and experience will permit and we will probably surprise ourselves with the results. How different is this method of approach as com- pared to the conversation in which Jones is try- ing to force Smith to listen to a lengthy discourse on a subject in which he is not a bit interested. All highly successful men have taught them- selves how to listen. They have considered it im- portant in a social contact as well as in the busi- ness interview. VVe all feel that the ability to address an audience is an accomplishment. but sel- dom think of the ability to listen intelligently as an achievement. Such leaders as Mr. Schwab, John Hay, Colonel House, Silent Cali' Coolidge and others felt that listening was far more than mere silence. They not only felt a genuine in- terest in what people were saying, but even more it. Yet many sort even with they took the trouble to display of us ignore precautions of this the very people who we are most anxious to im- remember that press and win over. XNe must whenever we are over-anxious to do the talking, we are liable not to listen attentively because we will be too much concerned with what we are going to say next. According to Isaac Marcos- son, celebrated for his interviews with the great, The highest compliment that you can pay any- one is to listen intently to him. To listen in- tently is not only in itself an easy way to charm people but. in addition, it is one of the best meth- ods of inducing people to talk. Unfortunately, in a few of our social contacts, as well as in our business associations, we make enemies instead of friends. This result is very often due to our foolish and childish insistence on showing our superiority. We demand satis- faction without really knowing what true satis- faction is. Sometimes we lack that bit of tact which is so necessary to shield the other fellow's

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THE FRATECH I AM STILL RICH By Rov L. SMITH We have passed through a panic, suffered from a crash on the stock market and are now more than -half 'way througlz the depression and I am still rich. It may be true that I have much less to live on than I had a year ago, but it is certainly true that I have just as much as ever to live for. The real values of life are unshaken and solid. The stock crash cost us much that we never had-paper profits which never got nearer our pock- ets than the financial pages of the daily papers. The market failed but nothing else did. Prices went down but not one acre lost its fer- tility and all the electrons, protons and ether waves went on working in their accustomed ways. When the depression came I was compelled to take an invoice and soon discovered that I was still rich. All my capacity for the enjoyment of life was intact. My two-hundred-thousand-dol- lar eyes are just as good as they ever were. Every landscape and sunset is mine if I want it. Twenty- thousand-dollar scenes and views are added to my collection almost every week. A hundred-thousand- dollar sense of hearing is still unimpaired and by it I become an heir to a world of beauty and in- spiration. Then there's my million-dollar stomach and a half-million-dollar appetite. No doctor has sen- tenced me to spinach for the rest of my life. Bet- ter to have plain food and an appetite than to sit down to a banquet with no appetite. No man can be rich who is compelled to take orders daily from his stomach. The depression has not lowered the value of a single friendship. Neighbors still greet us in the same old cordial way, business associates believe in us, and our sons hold us in high respect. The wife's welcome at the close of the day has not de- preciated in the least and our daughters continue to lavish their affection upon us with the same old extravagance. My faith in the goodness of the universe is un- impaired. By that faith I am emboldened as I face defeat and despair. The prayers my mother Here is an antidote for the business de- pression that has been so far overlooked by our financial experts, but which is neverthe- less heartily recom- mended at this time. taught me and the faith in God instilled in me by a devout father remain as priceless treasures no depression can touch. No nation becomes great by becoming rich. Neither does a man find enduring satisfaction in life by 0'wn1'1zg something-only by becoming something. The most degrading poverty is that which results from killing the spirit that the body may be served. This depression has cost us some of the things we created but it has robbed us of none of our power to create. We may lose some beautiful things but we have lost no love of the beautiful. It is a clzallmzgc, not a catas- trophe. A generation that has conquered the air and sent giant planes circling the globe, which has plunged into the deeps and disported on the ocean's floor, which has climbed above the clouds and lived in the strato- sphere, is now faced with the challenge to rise above its dependence on mere things and seek an emancipation of the spirit of man. The last six months have been for many men a thrilling spiritual adventure through which they have discovered their real wealth. Bereft of divi- dends and profits they are discovering the sustain- ing powers of a strong religious faith, the abiding values of courage, heroism, honor, charity, and trustworthiness. A financial crisis can wipe out profits and bring business to a standstill but character is beyond its reach. It can rob us of all we have but it cannot affect what we are. The investments we made in ambitious youth, hospitals, crippled children's camps, colleges, and service institutions go on paying dividends. The deepest satisfactions of life-those which come from sharing and serving-remain secure. I am still rich because I am independently rich -none of my wealth depends upon business con- ditions or market reports. -Reprinted from The Rotarian Magazine. Thirty-fi'vc

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THE FRATECH vanity. A shoe salesman told a woman trying on pumps: Madam, one of your feet is LARG- ER than the otherf' In the next shoe shop, the salesman said: Madam, one of your feet is SMALLER than the other, and she bought the shoes. The second man was a salesman, the first was not. Everybody knows the value of humor in put- ting people at ease and in winning their good will. A little humor sometimes helps to avoid an embarrassing situation which might otherwise possibly result in ill feeling. Like Lincoln, many leaders have been famous for their ability to make people laugh. Humor has been one of their rec- ognized methods of controlling men. However, let us not confuse humor with sarcasm. One of the shrewdest blows we can strike at the other fellow's ego is to make him the butt of ridicule or laughter. Irony, sarcasm, and satire are use- ful tools of combat against those who need to be squelched, but like those drugs and medicines labelled poison, a small dose properly applied may be beneficial while a large dose improperly han- dled might prove fatal. Kidding is of course a mock combat in which 'two people each get a thrill from their own suc- cessful thrusts. The risk of all kidding lies in those accidental thrusts which occasionally strike too deep. If we intend using humor as part of our plan of attack in incurring the good will of the other. we should remember that the safest types of jokes are ones in which we make our- selves the butt, or the joke that conveys a com- pliment, or the one about imaginary people who are entirely out of range. We can win people's esteem just by being good-humored and pleasantg emotion are contagious. As we develop our ability in making social con- tacts and increase our scope of friends, we should develop our personality. Now we might well ask: What are the facts about personality, and how can it be developed P Part of the answer we find in those words of Charles M. Schwab: We are all salesmen, every day of our lives. We are selling our ideas, our plans, our energies, our enthusiasm to those with whom we come in con- tact. After all, personality is only the total of the effects we have on other people. If we succeed in selling ourselves, if other people like us and our plans, we may be said to have a good per- sonality. Walter Gifford, president of the Ameri- can Telephone and Telegraph Company, the larg- est corporation in the world, believes that person- ality is one of the most important factors in the ultimate success of a young man. We could go on at length to discuss the art of making successful social contacts, developing a pleasing personality, etc., but after all for the vast majority of us who are amateurs in this art, the procedure for the start is quite simple and easily applied. MAKE AS MANY VVORTH WHILE SOCIAL CONTACTS AS YOU CAN so that by experience and watchfulness you will develop the ability to analyze and treat each new contact as that individual case re- quires. Keep in mind the various methods that can be used to win victory but remember too that PERSONAL SATISFACTION is not always victory. Remember that it is possible to talk yourself out of something as easily as you can talk your way into it, and that, therefore, it is sometimes wise to do the listen- ing, and above all be tactful. Three Gates If you are temped to reveal A tale some one to you has told About another, make it pass Before you speak, three gates of gold, Three narrow gatesg First, Is it true ?' Then, Is it needful ?,' In your mind Give truthful answer, and the next Is last and narrowest, Is it kind ? And if to reach your lips at last It passes through these gateways three. Then you may tell, nor ever fear XVhat the result of speech may he. -A 11011. 9 It lsn't To apologize. To begin again. To admit error. To be unselfish. face a sneer. Easy To To be considerate. To endure success. To keep on trying. To profit by mistakes. forgive and forget. To To think and then act. keep out of the rut. To To make the best of little. To shoulder deserved blame. subdue an ugly temper. To To maintain a high standard. To recognize the silver lining. --But it always pays in the end. -Jerome P. Fleishman. Thirty-seven