Canton High School - Flash Yearbook (Canton, MO)

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---------------------------Senior Class Prophecy ------------------------------------------ I was recently able to return to Canton to visit my old school chums, the class of 88. (It was now 2008.) As I drove into town and passed Martin Park I saw stables with horses. I found out later that Chris Downs had married Gail Collins and their stables were a large tourist attraction. Behind the stables I saw a small repair shop run by Ricky Simmons, Billy Childress, and Doug Green. I stopped in and chatted with them and discovered that Devra Buckwalter had married Steve Uhlmeyer. They are expecting their twelfth child. Steve is still praying for their first boy. They run Uhlmeyer's Bar Grill in the hills of Georgia. Sara Small is also expecting and is a housewife. Jeff Murphy happened to drop by the repair shop because the rain hindered him from farming. Jeff saw Billy Wells and Stephen Nelson at his daughter's female Junior High School where they work as janitors. They seemed to be enjoying themselves. They were cleaning up after the Gospel Music Show that my old friend Chad Zahn starred in. It sure was nice of Renee Sherwood to hire him. I said good-bye and headed over to my old school, and who greeted me at the door, but Melissa Schuetz. She was happy to see me and immediately began telling me about my other classmates. It seems her sister, Michelle Schuetz, is working with Dr. Ruth on her new book. Brenda McCloy married Mark Walters and is living in Quincy where she works as a travel agent at Bergners. Naomi Schork works as a veterinarian in St. Louis. Tracy Fryer has just been elected president of Chi Omega sorority at Harvard. Cindy Carskadon has been on an African safari where she met Scott Bridgeman who has an acute case of malaria and is in quarantine. Robbie Sullens is unemployed at the moment, although he is writing country music for the Grand Ole Opry. James Parrish is a sergeant in the Army but his whereabouts are unknown. Jimmy Crenshaw married Ann Allison and they are robbing banks. They were last seen headed for Cuba. Traci White, her husband, and daughter are running a YMCA Camp in Colorado. Missy Brooks is a fashion designer in Paris. Krissie Penn and Teresa Bringer are running a Day Care Center next to Roger Hetzler and Davy Woodworth's Aerobic Fitness Center in Canton. Tonya Otto and P. K. Feldkamp have their own art gallery in downtown Chicago. This is just a little bit too much for me to comprehend and I remember the class clown, Eric Voss. To my surprise, I found out he is the head of the department of sanitation and waste for the entire New York City. I went into Ayerco and I almost fainted when I saw Candy Jacobs, Beth Ann Gaus, and Wendy Wilson all dressed in black and white passing out brochures for their new convent. I began feeling dizzy so I checked into a hotel. The manager was playing with her new SAC computer designed and incorporated by Sean Cooper. She told me that there was a basketball game at Culver. Head Coach, Andy Schroeder, and Assistant Coach, Michael Levengood, were having a good season. It seems that they were forced to take the positions because of damages done to the President's home while drag racing in the Fantom and Mustang down the concourse. I turned on the T.V. to watch the Head Coach, Mike Dunaway, of the Dallas Cowboys demolish the Pittsburgh Steelers. There was a news flash announcing the retirement of basketball star Kevin Scheufele of the L.A. Lakers. I flipped the channel and I saw Tricia Hardin on her Women's Lib Talk Show. A commercial came on and the old class Vice-President's smiling face appeared on the screen for Wilbur's of Hollywood, Lingerie and Intimate Apparel. As I was about to fall asleep, my football game was interrupted. I smiled as I heard the voice of the President of the United States giving in inaugural speech. It was my former Class President. 7

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Senior Class Will The L.A. IV class wills the L.A. Ill class their ability to stay awake in class. Eric Voss wills Ann Allison his positive attitude and his fabulous taste in music. I, Eric Voss, will Steve Merrell a box of Swisher Sweets. I, Andy Schroeder, will Randy Horner my common sense. (Ha, Ha) I, Tracy Fryer, will Tami Scott the ability to go out with a Canton guy instead of a Kahoka guy and not talk about him all the time. I, Candy Jacobs, will the Junior Class my ability to give blood. Beth Ann Gaus wills Mindy Boyd the traditional bottle of cover-up. We, the Senior Girls, will Jennifer Pierce a box of Kleenex. I, Sara Small, will Shari Small my reputation. We, the Senior Boys, will Todd Hinton a Cabbage Patch doll so he can keep his hands on it instead of all the girls. We, the Senior Boys, will Mike Bringer a mirror so he doesn't have to ask everyone if he's getting bigger. I, Tricia Hardin, will Pam Rudicil the ability to flirt with college guys. I, Wendy Wilson, will Angela Dennison my ability to drive my parents' vehicle without wrecking it. We, the Senior Boys, will Dennis Durst all of our class rings to give to all his girlfriends. I, Kevin Scheufele, will Mike Harris the ability to play cards. We, the Senior Girls, will all the Junior Girls the ability to walk down the street without drowning in a rainstorm. I, Candy Jacobs, will Mr. Rusk the ability to stay in a good mood for a whole day. I, Candy Jacobs, will Mr. Rusk the ability to make up better lies. I, Tricia Hardin, will Sean Flanagan my acting ability and a new hair-do to get rid of the quills. I, Kevin Scheufele, will Mike Bringer the ability to find a good “parking spot. I, Tricia Hardin, will Shelly Lewis my reputation. I, Wendy Wilson, will Amy James my chest. I, Eric Voss, will Ron Sweet a plug for band. I, W. G. Lewis, will the Junior Girls my wonderful driving ability. I, Eric Voss, will Jeff Knipmeyer my bass voice. We, the Senior Girls, will Angela Dennison a new saying because her “Oh, my God is getting old. I, Beth Ann Gaus, will Steve Jarvis the ability to comb his hair without going to the bathroom. I, Beth Ann Gaus, will Dee Raleigh the ability to keep her Blazer on the road. Tonya Otto wills Jennifer Pierce the ability to go to class and not say This is stupid and Well never use this in our life! I, W. G. Lewis, will Mike Harris my Boogie Boys' Rap tape. We, the Senior Girls, will Linda Coates a new hair color. We, Beth Ann Gaus and Candy Jacobs, will Steve Merrell the ability to not act ignorant. I, Tonya Otto, will Diahn Moline the ability to jam out on Whitesnake tapes. We, Melissa and Michelle Schuetz, will Tina and Gina Eisenbeiss our attitudes. The Senior Girls will Linda Coates dance lessons. I, Mike Levengood, will Steve Jarvis the station wagon so he'll have a car that runs. I, Andy Schroeder, will Sean Flanagan a picture of myself so he'll have something to imitate. We, P. K. Feldkamp and Beth Ann Gaus, will Sean Flanagan the ability to play an instrument because he can’t sing. I, Eric Voss, will Bobby Kennedy the ability to take his hat off. We, the Senior Boys, will Jamie Crane the ability to shop in the men's section. We, John, Andy and Sean, will the Algebra II class brains enough not to take Calculus. I, Wendy Wilson, will Jeff Knipmeyer the ability to accept the fact that Iowa is great. We, Beth Ann Gaus and Wendy Wilson, will Dennis Durst the ability to retell a story like it really happened. I, Naomi Schork, will the girls in my third-hour Spanish Class the ability to got the whole hour without gossiping. I, Chad Zahn, will Dennis Durst the traditional bag of ice. I, Scott Bridgeman, will Kevin Porter a mustache so he'll have something to trim. We, the Senior Class, will the Junior Class.. .well, what can we will them; they already think they have everything. 6

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Sponsors: Miss Moore, Mr. Lillard, Miss Gladbach, Mr. Rusk, President: John Collins, Vice-President: W. G. Lewis, Secretary: Tracy Fryer, Treasurer: Eric Voss. Scott Bridgeman 'Teresa Bringer Missy Brooks B)cvra Buckjvalttr Cindy Carskadon Bitty CfiCdress