Canastota High School - Toot Yearbook (Canastota, NY)

Page 30 text:

CLASS PROPHECY Hello, folks! Here we are again, about to delve into the past of another one of our friends. As our guest tonight, we have none other than the inventor of that ultramodern time machine, Sir Ty Mout. As a special treat, he is going to let us review his life by taking us back in his machine. We had planned to go back to 1955, but most of his friends were in high school then, so we’ll stop at 1970 instead. All set? Sir Ty Mout, This-is-your-life! Here we are! Here’s Ty, but his son’s across his knees. We find that the boy has thrown paint at his teacher, Miss Theila Bowman. But he’s only in 3rd grade—when he’s of an age for Annapolis, I’ll bet Miss Pat Miller, a teacher there, can make him behave. And if he goes to Notre Dame, he’ll receive the necessary discipline from Dean Rosalie Finocchiaro. Here we go to another scene in Ty’s life—on a visit to our old friend Liberace. Let’s peep in the window before we ring the bell. Oh, look, he’s getting his aged fingers massaged by our own Chuck Sgroi, the well- known masseur. And there’s Liberace’s dental hygienist, Mrs. L. Picciano, once Bobbi Farfaglia. She’s getting ready to brighten up that toothy smile of his. Why, there’s Ty’s wife, the former Mary Ellen Schepp. She’s having quite a time with their nine boys and two gilds. It’s really something to be able to raise a champion baseball team, plus two coaches. With a family that size, I’ll wager that Ty has many times wished he had as much money as our millionaire friends, such as Russ Boston, Pat LaVancher, and Mrs. Mayda Munney, formerly Barb Peron. Barb didn’t waste time making her million—she just married a tall millionaire. Even with a big family, Ty’s worries are almost nothing compared to those of Archie Argentine. He’s living in India now, with his happy harem. Think how much it must cost him to send all his wives by plane to N. Y. C. to the world-famed Be-Bop Beauty Box. Joan Bayliss and Mary Ann Dilettoso, co-owners of the beauty shop, can really make them look beautiful, too. At the Be-Bop Beauty Box now is Ty’s wife, getting her hair done by their head beautician, Miss Shirley Hepler. She’s getting ready for a wedding coming soon. Barbara Kincaid's going to become HIS. Say, where does that door lead? Oh, yes! Kenny Barres’ 5th Avenue Pool Hall. Whom do we find there but our friends Mike Carney, Louis DeBalso and Fred LaVancher, all taking it easy after a hard day’s work. Fred’s now a beer sampler at a brewery, Mike’s an air wick adjuster in a sardine factory, and Louis has a pleasant job as flower-stretcher in Dick’s (Fults) Flower Shop. We’re going out tonight, to the grand re-opening of the Avon Theater, now under the new management of Janice Kneeskern. Lots of Ty’s neighbors are at the Avon tonight. There are Mr. and Mrs. Murray Kilts and their four boys, and Mrs. Sweet and her five little “honeys”. Mrs. Kilts used to be Gloria Patterelli, and Sara Narehood married her honey, Mr. Sweet. Home again with Ty, where Jean Wollaber, a secretary, who in her spare time is the baby-sitter, tells us that one of Ty’s sons, Darrell, is sick. To the telephone we go, to tell the operator, Nancy Newcomb, to call Dr. Carol Myers, family doctor. Dan-ell has to go to the hospital, so shall we pay him a visit? The nurses, including hospital supervisor Kathryn Capparelli, head nurse Judy Galton, and Darrell’s special nurse, Carol Heffron, all give him good care. Ty’s been at the hospital all night, and is getting home now, just as Dick Stokes is delivering Grade A-l, pre-homogenized milk from his dairy. He gets his milk, the very best, from David Niles’ “Dear Dairy Farm”. No sleep last night and now Ty must (Continued on page 55) page twenty-eight

Page 29 text:

her? But much to her dismay, who should come swimming out to rescue her—none other than good old Smitty! After we had finished playing our strenuous games of Ring-a-Round-a-Rosie, Drop the Handkerchief, and Farmer in the Dell, we decided to have a good old water fight. The bus driver did not appreciate it, however, when we returned, soaking wet, to his nice dry bus. Our last three years had gone by so rapidly, it was difficult to believe that we were at last seniors. Our officers for our last year were Carol Myers as president; Rosalie Finn, as vice-president; Patty Miller as sec- retary; and John Reitano as treasurer. We held our light bulb sale and magazine campaign almost at the same time to earn enough money for our “Toot”. At the Hallo- ween dance we put on a floor show and our seniors showed their many hidden talents. Mike Carney was especially good as the hula narrator. Our senior girls made outstanding football players, and did you ever see such can-can dancers? We had our graduation pictures taken early and we waited patiently to get the first glimpses of them. Such groans were heard when we realized they looked exactly like us. It wasn’t long before we were busy working on the Toot. Kathryn Capparelli was (Continued on page 55 SOPHISTICATED SENIORS page twenty-seven

Page 31 text:

go to work. He’s doing research on the very time machine in which we’re now traveling. He keeps both his secretaries, Shirley Janovsky and Mary Pulverenti, busy record- ing all his research material. Let’s leave Ty to his research, and visit his wife, who is shopping for groceries now. With her, we enter Dunn’s Bakery, where we see Jack Dunn at his celebrated job, taking the holes out of donuts. Now, down the street we go, on our way meeting lots of friends out shopping, too. Here’s Mrs. Fred Smith, the former Helene Sgroi—doesn’t she look happy? And Mrs. R., who’s happy, too. She used to be Miss Joyce Robison. Here’s the meat market—we’d better stop and get some meat. But will we buy Vienna sausage? A friend of ours, Gib Tornatore, is horsemeat grinder in a Vienna sausage factory. After a couple weeks of worry, Darrell is well and comes home from the hospital. Now his parents and the rest of the family need a rest and vacation. Send the kids to John Reitano’s summer camp, where they can learn a few navy tricks from Bud Mc- Killip, the dry dock sailor. They can learn lots of camp fire songs from music counselor Sandra Grago. During school season she’s Dean of the Crane School of Music. Next, we’ll send all Ty’s accounts to be settled and bills to be paid to his private accountant, Kenny Fox, to take care of them. That’s too much for him to do alone, so we’ll hire the services of Elizabeth Winnie, cer- tified public accountant, to help him out. Now that they’re relieved of financial cares and cares of the children, Ty and his wife can rest at last, at Roemar’s Summer Rest Home. There they will be ably cared for, by Alice Bennett, head nurse and pro- prietor of the home, and her two assistant practical nurses. They are Millie Cross, who also entertains with her singing, and Pat Curtis. Many of our friends are also taking a well-deserved vacation at the Rest Home. Two private secretaries are there, Sylvia Turner, who is secretary to a general in the Army, and Joyce Bellinger, Eddie Fisher’s private secretary. And the super-salesman, Charles Hood, during his vacation is selling happiness. We’re all rested now, but why go back to work? The children are enjoying camp, so let’s go with Ty on a long vacation. First comes a trip to the Powder Puff Derby, a stock car race, thrilling right to the finish. Listen to the crowd roaring, cheering the new champ, Judy Smith. Now we pay a visit to Rocky DiVeronica, busy at his annual job (?) of judging the Miss America beauty contest. The contest isn’t over yet, but we have to leave to catch our plane to Africa. Our pilot is that ace, Gladys Ryel, who took to flying to ease the traffic situation. Our plane develops trouble over the ocean, and we have to land on the nearest island. We’re greeted by none other than Toby White, a practical nurse who lives there all year ’round to care for everyone who crash-lands there. But what island is it? Toby tells us its name—“Geeg’s Tropical, Romantic Beach,” owned by Geeg Musacchio. Soon the plane is repaired, and we fly on to Africa. Tony Polidori, the renowned big game hunter, and his gun-bearer, Bobby Cesarini, will guide us into deepest Africa. You needn’t fear the Mau Maus, because missionary Paula Hazen has taught them to hunt for friends instead of hunting heads. On our trek through the jungle, we meet a group of the friendly Mau Maus, and find that they’ve been taught by that educated hobo, Donny Galavotti, who met them in his wanderings around the world. Before we return to the U. S., we’ll go to Iran and pay a visit to ex-premier Mossa- degh. But we’re met at his door by his nurse, Elsa Haldenwang, who tells us we can’t see him—he’s having a crying spell. Home again at last. Traveling is fun but it’s wonderful to be back home with the (Continued on page 55) page twenty-nine