Bureau Township High School - Beuro Yearbook (Princeton, IL)

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THE BEURO Donald: How can you chew your gum so long? Willard: Oh I soak it in gasoline to get more mileage. The Iaziest woman in the world is the one who will put popcorn in her pancakes so they will turn over by themselves. Gail fmopping his browlz Gosh, boss, it ain't much fun workin' with the thermometer 98 in the shade. IVIr. May: Well, you darn fool, what's that to you? I'm not asking you to work in the shade, am I. MAN IS LIKE HIS SHGES I-Iow much a man is like his shoes: For instance, both a sole may lose, Both need a mate to be complete. And both are made to go on feet: Both need healing, and oft are soled, And both in time all turn to mold. With shoes, the last is first, With man, the first shall be Iastg And when shoes wear out they're mended new, When men wear out they're deadmen, toog They are both trod upon, and both Will tread on others, nothing Ioath. Both have their ties and both incline, When polished, in the world to shine, And both peg out. Now, would you choose to be a man or be in his shoes? Mr. Forster: Good heavens man, what is the matter with your face? Were you in an automobile accident? Mr. Troyer: No, I was being shaved by a lady barber when a mouse ran across the floor.' ' Leslie: Well my father has another wife to support now. lVIarjorie:. I'low's that? Is he a bigamist? Leslie: No, but I just got married. Verda: I'll give George credit for getting me a nice engagement ring. Arzellaz I understand that's what the jeweler did too.

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THE BEURG Jokes DO YOU BELIEVE IN SIGNS? If you drop a fork and it sticks in the floor, it's a sign that it's a good fork. If you spill the salt, it's a sure sign that you have salt room frheuml. If you break a looking glass, it's a sign that you'll have to buy another. If you spill the dish cloth on the floor, it's a sign that you'II have to pick it up again. If you see a man going into a pawn shop with a bundle, it's a sign that he's going to take the pledge. If you help your self to a piece of butter when you already have a piece on your plate, it's a sign that you will have two pieces. If you see a cat drinking milk, it's a sign it's dry. If a boy falls in the river, it's a sign it's wet. lf you believe any of these signs, it's a sign you're a fool. She: Did I ever show you the place where I hurt my hip? He: N-no. She: All right, we'II drive over there. How is your son getting along in the Ford factory? Fine, Ed. I-Ie's been promoted. Promoted! You don't say! Yep! I-Ie used to put on chassis nut number 34 and they jumped him up to chassis nut number 37. Small boy: What is college bred, pop? Pop fwith son in collegelz They make college bred, my son, from the flour of youth and the dough of old age. What kind of a car have you? I got a Wreck. A Wreck? Yeah. Every time I park it a dozen people come up and ask me if I have reported the accident yet.

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THE BEURO Scotchman: Give me five cents worth of poison. Druggist: We can't make up five cents worth. We can only make 25C worth. Scotchman fafter deep thoughtjz Aw well, l'm not gonna commit suicide. Saint Peter gazed from out the pearly gates one morning recently to discover a person shivering in the cold outside. Why Orville, he exclaimed, how did you get here? Flu. Father: This show is not what l expected. l'm afraid it's scarcely the right kind of a play for a girl of your age. Mildred: Oh, don't worry, it may get peppier as it goes on. Phineas Shark, the eminent statistician and mathematician, estimates that if all the persons who drive from the back seat this summer were placed end to end it would be a good idea to push them off a bridge. Arthur: Do you object to petting? Martha: That's one thing l never done yet. Arthur: Petted? Martha: No, objected. DO YOU REMEMBER WAY BACK WHEN- Orville fell down stairs. Arzella had a boyish bob. Dorothy talked only of Oley. Willard took Ruth to the Freshmen Party. Gail and Evelyn studied Physics in the dark. Evelyn and Ruth were kicked out of Clothing Class. i.ii,,..,-11 Little drops of water freezing as they fallg Fat man's feet fly upward--biffl and that is all. Orville: Why are doctors the meanest men on earth? Gail: Because they treat you and then make you pay for it. .,....,,,..... Lap: What is the difference between a cat and a match? William: Because a cat lighted on it's feet and a match on it's head.