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Page 17 text:
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DROPPING COURSES Withdrawing from a course here is kind of like escaping from Chinese fingercuffs, you've got to ease your way out. You should make the decision to drop a course as early as possible, preferably within the first five minutes of the first lecture, because the further you get into the semester, the greater the likelihood that some C.P.s will drop by your room wanting to know what's up? Having made your deci- sion, you should hint at it- before, during, and after class. Before: It's recally too bad. The syllabus coincides with my biorhythm. Dur- ing: In a stage whisper I must be back in the coffin by noon! After: You know, now I know how Adam and Eve felt. Just before you drop the course entirely, you should go by the registrar's office and discreetly drop off a little note. Proper Bruin form dictates that about ten minutes into your last class session you quietly rise, side-step along the wall to the door. Touching but never crossing the ankles. As soon as you get outside run back to your room, pull down the shades, lock the door, turn off the lights, and hide under your bed for about 24 hours. Professors and, of course, the Curricular Police, are a bit touchy about the whole matter, but if you must, play it cool and there shouldn't be any trouble. TAKING AN INCOMPLETLE Taking an incomplete is like borrowing money from a loanshark. Don't do it. Sure it seems like the only way out at the timethe IGHA end of the semester is so busy between trying to keep a balanced inventory of speed and bar- bituates, and plotting to hold up the reserve reading room, but it really isn't worth it. Living with an incomplete is like hell on Earth. The C.P.s come 'round you room three or four times a week: How's it coming along, kid? Oh, pretty good. I should have it done any day now. Sure, you will. Mind if we test your reflexes with a sledge hammer? And if it's over-the-summer, no matter where you are they'll track you down and remind you. One student who went off mountain climbing out West came to the top of a snowy peak to find a billboard asking, Is it done yet? Another reported lying on a beach on the southern coast of France when a prop plane flew over pulling a streamer that read, Ce n'est pas Y fini? MOOD OF THOUGHT COURSES These seminars provide a unique introduc- tion to a field of study. They are specifically designed by the instructor to suit his her mood. Some MOT courses which have been offered recently include: Angry Mathematics, Listless Religous Studies, Passionate Computer Science, Irritrable Urban Studies, Self-Pitying French, Horny Political Science, Giddy Biology, and Spiteful Comparative Literature. For many students, the approach is, at first, somewhat disturbing: For the first half of the semester I couldn't bear to look at my geology professor. I mean, I've never seen anyone 7 . 1 A W MACKIE 13
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Page 18 text:
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s0 anxious twitching, sweating, shifting, chain-smoking, cracking his knuckles. Then suddenly it dawned on me what a great metaphor his demeanor was for geologic forces. Like the tectonic plates of the Earth and metamorphic rock and volcanoes, they're all under extreme constant pressure! OTHER ACADEMIC OPPORTUNITIES Auditing- With the concurrence of the in- structor, the fact that the course has been audited shall be entered on the student's permanent record. The course may be taken for credit if the decision is made by mid- semester. Vagabonding- A student, with the in- structor's permission, may visit a course oc- casionally. HeShe is entitled to participate in class activities at the instructors discretion. Sleazing- A student who attends class on a regular basis with his her clothing and hair in dissarray i.e. dirty, shoeless, etc. may have this noted on his her transcript with the in- structor's concurrence. The decision to clean up one's act must be made by mid-semester. Stowaway- A student may attend a class regularly without the instructor's permission by arriving early and hiding under a desk, chair, or table. The decision to come on out and face the music must be made by mid- semester. Hijacking- With EPC approval, a student may abduct a class of fellow students not more than three times a semester. Partial credit will be given as long as everyone is released unharmed. Joking- With the concurrence of the in- structor, a student may enroll for a course for which heshe is ridiculously over-qualified or extremely under-qualified on a mock basis. SOCIAL LIFE Traditionally, this section has begun with the statement, Neither orgiastic nor monastic, your social life at Brown can be anything you want to make of it. This, however, is no longer true. For years the orgiastics were burdened with guilt by the blatant non-indulgers i.e. nurd city. On the other hand, the monastics resented the orgiastics for having so much obvious fun. i.e. Dont those people ever work? Slowly but surely, the two have solidi- fied into rival factions on campus. After your first month here, you will be asked to sign up for membership in one group or the other. Failure to submit your Social Registration Form S.R.F. will result first, in a late fee, and ultimately, if it is not turned in, in social ostracization by both sides. There are drawbacks and benefits associated with either group so you should get as much in- formation as possible before making a final decision. The whole situation is not as innocuous as it seems. There are undercurrents of tension between the two groups and incidents have occured with increasing frequency. Last spring, for example, an orgiastic disurpted a monastic study marathon by spiking the coffee. As is often the case in such
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