Bourbon High School - Python Yearbook (Bourbon, IN)

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ooooooooov 4ooooooooooooooooooooooooo We have put this heading here so that you will know that these are jokes and that they are supposed to be funny. Do your duty by the Senior class by trying hard to laugh at them. ' Here's the first one. Naturally Mr. Ferguson in History class, Coratori- callyj And now we come to General Starke. He was a great man. His wife was a great woman, too. By what name is she known in history, Donald ? Pawnee Joe-- Mrs, Starke. Found in a Senior girls Physics Note Book-Question No. 17: What is the result when an irresistable force is applied to an immovable object? Answer unknown. A Great Demand. One Saturday morning as Mr. Parker was working very hard painting, he became very hungry and desired one of the doughnuts from the girl's pastry sale up town. As 'Doc.' Delp came along, he inquired of him whether he knew the price of the doughnuts. Three cents each, was the reply. Mr. Parker gave him six cents and told him to get him one and to get himself one with the other three cents. In a little bit, Doc came moseying back munching a dough- nut and as he handed back three coppers, he remarked, Sorry, Mr. Parker, but there was only one left. THE PYTHON '21 Je- Q. Another good one is told of Mr. Parker when he was painting a church. He was whistling a lively jazz tune and keeping time with his brush, when one of the trustees of the church came in. You shouldn't whistle in church, Par- ker, he said. I can work better while Whistling, he said. Then whistle some other tune. Mr. Parker promptly began whistling Nearer My God to Thee and also keeping ooooooooooooaooaooooovoooo time with his brush. The trustee, noticing the diminished speed, immediately said, Whistle the other tune, Parker. ........-......................... Miss Perkins, 15th grade teacherj- Rip Van Winkle went into the mountains, drank with some strange people and soon fell asleep and slept for 20 years. Carl Hand- Well, I don't doubt it, there's no tellin' what this moonshine licker will do to a fellow. The fair Junior, Eleanor Delp, had a lover in Gary who had joined the navy and was going to leave soon. She was much worried about him and so she sent a note to the minister to be read at church that ran thus: A man going to sea, his sweetheart desires the prayers of the congregation. The good man made a mistake and read it this way: A man going to see his sweetheart desires the prayers of the congregation. Little Polly Pritsch Fell in at ditch And cooled her pretty toes. Her mother came and caught her And whipped her little daughter For spoiling her nice new clothes. When Rev. Powell was making his first call on Mr. Ferguson, he, trying to be friend- lv. said to little Billy, How old are you, my little man ? I am five at home, six at school and three on the railroad trains, was the prompt re- ply!! oooononuoaaeoooooooo Page Fifty-four

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THE PYTHON '21 oooooooooooosoooooooooaoo-Qooooooonoaoooooooooooooooo Where Does He Get That Stuff? The following was found in Mr. Sellers' Physics Note Book: Eperiment 97. February 8, 1921. The Attraction of Unlike Objects. Apparatus: Cozy room, dim lights and a settee. Material: A Junior boy and a Junior girl. Process: Place the boy and the girl at op- posite ends of the aforementioned settee. In about 30 minutes sneakingly observe the result. Observations: They have moved together, so close that a fly counld't fly between them. Sonclusion: Unlike objects attract each ot er. The Domestic Science girls were soft boil- ing eggs and had been in the practice of timing them with an alarm clock in the class room, but one day it was out of order and as they all had wrist watches, Miss Habernicht told them to time the eggs by them. When they were served, she noticed that some of them were decidedly hard-boiled. Upon in- quiring of the girls, Thelma Eby spoke up: I thought,I ought to keep them in more than three minutes, because the minutes aren't as big on my little wrist watch as they are on the alarm clock. His Best and His Next Best. This happened at the fair about 6:30 Thursday evening. Virgil- I spent 851.00 on my girl today. Daniel- Does that count what vou spent Virgil- Oh. I forgot about Audra: S1.'80. on Audra Harmon, too? A Sample Conversation Between Daniel and Donald. CShakespearnean Stylel Donald- Youth, must I knock thee cold? Daniel- Thou wouldst if thou couldst. Chas. Rettinger to Ev. Eakins, on the way walking home, after a wild night in Etna- I may be broke so that I can't ride home, but there was a time when I rode in a car- r1age. Ev.- Yes, but your mother pushed ot. Hein Delp- I never smoke anything but quarter cigars. Winny Stoffer- Well, I smoke quarter cigars too, when I can't find any half cigars to pick up. - Ruth DeVore, fat the breakfast tablej- I read yesterday that wives were sold in the Fiji Islands for S5 apicef' Hack, fgrouchily, on account of a quarrel with Zelma the night beforel- Yeh, more profiteeringf' ,i. Mr. Ferguson- Well, William have you got your history? Bill Delp-- Yes, most of it. There was one thing that I couldn't quite understand, though. Fergy- What was that ? Bill-- It was about that Boston masquer- ade. Donald Fribley, the little Freshman, was sitting on the doorstep crying bitterly when a kind lady came along and inquired what was the matter. He wailed: I fell down and got my clean pants all dusty and ma wouldn't let me take them off before she dusted them. Butch Welch- I heard the other day of a man that lived on onions alone. Raleigh Sellers-- Well a man that lives on onions ought to live alone. , Claudie Vanner- I've traced my ancestry back to an English king. Fritz Bertsch- Sure, that's easy, a dead man don't have any chance to defend him- self. ,l.l.1l.l-.-ii Discussing the Fair Sex. Teak Erwin- What a high color Mary Slough has. George Wright- Yes, they say she won't have any of the cheap kind. -,- ,l.-1.111 An answer received on a final examination paper in Freshman Botany to the question- Name two articles that contain startchf' Two cuffs and a collar. Dire Consequences of Irrigation. Mr. Ferguson tsome more history class stuffl- What was the result of digging the Panama Canal? Wayne Stoler- I suppose the water ran in U one-..nu.-.unnfnu.. Page Fifty-tive