Boston College High School - Forbian Yearbook (Boston, MA)

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5 3 Hz 1' - L: Y. L F F F !. : 6 E f ff VE 9 4 t r 4 IZ THE FORBIAN WHERE HE GOT THE LAUGH

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THE FORBIAN Billiard Ball, and two live models. Frank Carey represented Be- fore Usingj' and 1ny old friend Andy,' O'Reilly was 42-Xfter Using. Quite apt and ingenious, I thought. John Fitz and Andy Ochs, t.he two prosperous owners of the Uphams Corner Market, Inc., Ltd., passed into the sanctum of their office and held a heated discussion as to whether or not the half-sour cranberries should be placed on sale at a slashing reduction. Instead their business sense won out and summoning VVarren, their office boy, they told him to raise the price three cents on the quart. Heart- less profiteersl Ray Hanlon and John Hartnett came walking along, bea.u1.iful and resplendent in their knickers. They had given up in despair their futile attempt to secure pants l-ong enough. -They were followed by a troop of children who were begging forone of their stockings to hang up for Santa Claus. Santa proved to be none other than Hap Vllard! VVasn,t he built great for a Santa? John and Ray worked for the Elevated, inspecting trolley wires. Pug Flynn, the Fighting Cop, when I saw him, had just arrested Cha.rlie La France who was trying to crash the gates at Fenway Park. Poor Charlie! He had gone from bad to worse and from worse- to College! John Elias Quinn was playing the outder garden for the Sox at the time. Though playing for twenty years he still hopes to make a hit. But he never will against Frank Deevy, the demon moundsman and pride of the Phillies. Joe Shanahan was in Keith's Vaudeville doing his two turns daily. He was billed as Professor Shanahan, Houdini's Protege. Joe had so-much practice getting out of jug that hand-cuffs and straight- jackets came easy in later life. On the same bill with Joe was that ini1nita.ble monologue artist, the comedy hit of the season, Joe Fitz- gerald. Passing a towering office building I noticed f'Kearns and Sugh- rue, Master Movers, rolling up before its gilded doors in one of their huge vans. VVho would ever think theytd go into the trucking business? 'They set about rolling huge bundles into the building and Old Father Time informed 1ne it was Billy Flynnis salary. You see Bill, after leaving school, wrote a really intelligible translation of the H-omer and now he lives handsomely on the royalties garnered during the sale of his laudable work. I sa.w Frank Kennedy using one 'of them. He was still vainly trying to make up that one day of class he missed. y Then Old Father Time handed me- a huge book which bore the inscription, 'tCity Directory, 19-453' Running through its lengthy pages I read as follows:

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THE Q FORBIAN Keleher, Pa.ul. R. I. P. Once a doctor with gi large practice he treated a patient for a cold who could have easily afforded appen- dicitis. Reinorse killed hini. Swanson. Tl1e Irish Terror. Known as tl1e greatest wrestler since the days of 'fBig Payne Munn. F. McCarthy. In the florist business. His work consists in pulling the buds from century plants. Doherty. Acting in a. Stock Conlpany, now out on the road. Was a positive hit last year as a cake- of ice in the scene where Eliza crosses the river in that old play, Uncle T011l,S Cabin. ,Leen. Now in Mexico and is a national hero, one of the great- est Etoreadors the industry has known. His high scho-ol start sent l1i1n out upon the road to success. Cavanaugh. A state employee. He recites, in his sobernioinents, Bedtime Stories tothe inmates of the Charles Street Jail. Sonietiines he sings. Now all the prisoners are clamoring for either pardon or innnediate execution. Hagan. Arthur' is still working trying tol niake enough money to send his grandfather to college. He has gone high, high in life. He works in the subway. His beautifully-trained voice now announces the coming and going of Park Street Cars. Haggerty. Someone told Frank he had a great pull so he be- ca.1ne a dentist. He was always heartless anyhow. He hopes to get the contract overhauling the tnsks of Tony, Molly, and VVaddy. Roberts. This cruel wretch is now out robbing orphaned widows and inotherless uncles, selling thenigworthless oil stock. He wears a bigcheckered vest and affects a twenty-live cent cigar. He is wanted in seven states. D McCrohan. Now teaching in the Elocution School for Little Tots. Little Els-ie and Mary just love their teacher! Last year he astounded the critics by teaching the word blue-'l to sound as tl1ough it had only two w's. Coinpliinentary tickets for his school's next prize contest are now on sale at the High School Lunch Room. Tiews. Salute our brave ferry captain. Len doesn't like the lferryg he says it niakes hi1n crossg but it affords a. line Chance to see the worldgand Len was always a bit of a traveler. Sliney. Friend Ed is right at llO1llC1l11 his new position. He is a bat boy for the Giants. John McGraw took an instant. liking to Ed. He likes men of snap and pep, who are continually on the run. Ed's salary is reputed to be greater than the Presidentlsff Of course everyone knows the President is Mike Farrell. Poor Mike, they nailed hiin for the job. No one wants to be president, now. In olden days Henry Clay remarked: I would rather be right than be president. Mike in his famous inaugural address remarks: 'fl didn't want to