Blue Mound High School - Blu Mo Illio Yearbook (Blue Mound, IL)

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one of the most unusual tuxedos I have ever seen- orange with pink stripes? Accompaning him is America's most eligible bachelor, Rodney Baughman and his current flame, Nancy Forneris. Most of you will remember that Nancy recently acquired the title of Miss Measurements of 1969. Some- thing seems to be caught in the car door. Yes, Miss Measurements has caught her -- well, she's already won the title! Tugging at my coat sleeve is the world's mad scientist, Steve Hanover. He is trying to persuade me to sample his latest discovery, Steve's Instant Hangover. Let's see-the simple instructions on the pack- age read: Dissolve one tablet in a fifth of whiskey and three quarts of gin. Then swallow rapidly. Sounds effective to me. Everyone's attention is now focused on the person entering the lobby. Is it Yul Bryner? No, it's Patty Mark who has just developed a new hair spray. It will soon be available in stores everywhere. You will recognize it by the slogan No fuss , no muss, no hair. What's causing all the commotion outside? There seems to be a traffic jam. Can someone tell me who is causing the disturbance? Oh, you say it is Nancy Gibson, the wife of Texas' most outstanding rancher. What seems to be her trouble? Well, no wonder. Who ever heard of trying to steera hor e into aparallel-parking space. Tha.t's a woman driver for you! Here comes amanwho has dedicated his life to aworthwhile humane project. It is none other than John Kirk, the optometrist who specializes in contact lenses for cross-eyed cats. How do you like your work, John? Oh, purr-ty good. Entering the lobby is a man whose work is really a grind, but even so he is a sharp worker. I am sure that most of you know that I am speak- ing of Murray Becklin, whose life's work is being a toothpick sharpener for the PICK-STICK TOOTHPICK COMPANY. Here is a little lady who seems to be rather nervous. Why yes, I recognize her now as Evelyn Atteberry who is a. target for a knife-throwing act. Do you like your work, Evelyn? Oh, it has a lot of good points. A Following close behind Evelyn is her hopeful companion, Karen Alsbury, the friendly undertaker. I hear that Karen's business has been going under for several years. Trudging toward us now is a glum trio. On parole from Song-Song Prison is Joann Jockisch, who has been in solitary confinement for the past ten years, after having been convicted of burning up the road between Bethany and Blue Mound. Flanking her on both sides are two uniformed police ladies--Donna Staley and Carolyn Ross. They are, you remember, the same two police ladies who successfully captured the teenagers who tried to steal the Pacific Ocean.

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PROPHECY Here we are ladies and gentlemen in the lobby of the SEE-MORE Theatre, where tonight, Thursday, April l, 1969, is the premiere of Tarzan's Fight for Wife, starring he-man Wendell Rosborough, and co- starring Lynn Downing as Jane. Standing here inthe lobby, I will be able to interview for your listening pleasure several of the spectators as well as the celebrities as they come to view the spectacular new movie. I see our first arrival hasjust come bouncing through the door-too bad we hadn't unlocked it yet. As they pick him up off the floor and wipe away the shattered glass, we can see that it is Rollin Davis, better known as Twinkle Toes, dancing star of Light-Hearted Studios, Inc. Setting up his stand in one corner of the lobby is Roger Baughman, one of America's most prosperous gum salesmen. We can read his sign from here-- Have Gum, Will Chew. Entering the lobby is one of America's most devoted missionaries , Carole Edwards, who has spent the past several years working in deepest Africa with her pigrny friends to whom she is known as Big Mama. Walking toward me is an attractive young woman whom I see quite often when I stay at the SLEEP-LESS HOTEL, where she is an elevator operator. Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to present Judy Hamilton. How is the elevator business, Judy? Oh, it has its ups and downs. Have any of our old friends been in your hotel lately? Why yes, last week our hotel was host to the woman who won the Mother of the Year award, whom I am sure you remember as Chris Bailey. Her fifteen children are really darlings. Standing beside me is a man with an unusual occupation. Sir, would you tell us your name. John William Hall. What do your friends call you? Well, due to my occupation, many of them call me Johnny, the jolly jelly bean polisher. A shiny black limousine has just pulled up in front of the theatre and a crowd has gathered around it. Emerging from the deep plush cushions is the well-known beauty-contest judge , Mick Fleewvood. He is dressed in

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From the world of sanitation comes Rodney Gorden who has spent the last five years in Australia, satisfying his life-long ambition-cleaning pouches for kangaroos. Does Lestoil really do everything, Rodney? Here comes a girl who really fits into her surroundings. Yes, Mary Fortner's position as a leotard model requires that she put everything into her job. A loud fanfare announces the arrival of Rick Brett, Illinois' most honery senator, whose prime ambition in life is to get the state capital moved to Boody. Shadowing this great statesman is the private detective, Saul Blake, whom I remember as Dale Jenkins. Saul is the trusted com- panion of Terry Lason, the famed lawyer, who is currently working on The Case of the Shrinking Curves. Terry, whom I remember as Richard Dowling, recently announced his engagement to his attractive secretary, Stella Avenue , the former Phyllis Showalter. Have you watched TV lately? If so, I'm sure you've seen the girl who just entered the lobby--Barbara Shride, who is the model for The Lady Is You advertisements, which as you remember read The lady is you in your Mercury outboard motor. A great cheer outside has just announced the arrival of the lady who accomplished one of the most highly-publicized feats in the history of woman. Every newspaper and magazine in the country has featured her story. Hello there, Jane Scott. I'm sure you folks all know that not only was Jane the first lady to reach the moon, but that she went there self- propelled. I understand, Jane, that your trip was made possible only by large masses of hot air. Could you tell us exactly what happened once again? Well, actually it was nothing. One day I was just talking real fast and all of a sudden I just took off! Coming out of the rest room with a happy and relieved look on her face Qbecause of the fact that her play is such a success, is the writer, Judy Curtin. Judy's love for the jungle has paid off in two ways--this successful movie and her discovery of a precious Jim. Before I sign off the air, I thought you would like to meet the stars of the show, so let's take the mike over here to see if we can edge ourselves through the crowd to where they are busily signing autographs. First, let's talk to Lynn Downing who is successfully playing Jane. We've noticed you have several unique costumes. Which one did you like best, Lynn? My bear- skin. The co-star of the movie is handsome, he-man Wendell Rosborough. What was the hardest line for you to learn, Wendell? Me Tarzan, you Jane. Well, the lights just dimmed here in the lobby, which means the show is just about to start. So, this is your Hollywood reporter, Marvin Widick, returning you to Radio Station B CNU . Good evening, friends.