Bloomington High School - Aepix Yearbook (Bloomington, IL)

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T H E A E G I S VIVE LA COOKERY MAID Zan THAXTON. There was a young maiden, to cooking school went. Vive la. cookery maid. On dishes delicious her mind was intent. Vive la cookery maid. Her apron was dainty, her cap it was neat, The figure she made was distractingly sweet 3 Brut the things she concocted, a goat would not eat. Vive la cookery maid. She started on doughnuts that would not cook through. Vive la cookery maid. She toiled with the soup but they used itlfor glue. Vive la cookery maid. They used her plum pudding to poison the rats 5 Her griddle-cakes might have been used for door-mats 3 With her biscuits, her brother disabled six cats. Vive la. cookery maid. At last she made something, a pie so she said. Vive la. cookery maid. ,Twas tough as sole leather and heavy as lead. Vive la cookery maid. She put it away and went Straight up to bed, A burglar broke in and upon it he fed, When they came in the morning, the burglar was dead. Vive la cookery maid. THE FRONTIERSMAN'S STORY CHARLES Pnrrvs. It was a. cozy little hut. On one sidfe there was a huge fireplace, while on the walls were hung skins of various kinds of animals. A great log lay sputtering in the fireplace, and before it were three boys sprawled on the iioor. Two men past the prime of life were sitting together and gazing absently into the fire. Tell us a story, Uncle Bob, requested George Mason, a lad of fourteen. The old man filled his pipe and smoked in silence for awhile as though to collect his thoughts before he answered. The boys settled into comfortable positions for they knew they would hear something worth listeninl to. At length he removed his pipe and began. Well, it war about twenty-six year ago. The snow come early that winter and humans war caught unawares as well as beasts. There war tour of us in the shack 28 .

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THE AEGIS MR. DOOLEY VISITS THE DRAMATIC CLUB'S ENTERTAINMENT Q- JOHN O'NEIL. Shure Hinnissy! Wantin' to kape up wid th' dlreft iv th' times, I im now enteristin' mesilf in th' dhramatik club in Ameriky, consiquintly I go whir'r th' viry bist is oflired. Not many weeks sinse, I attinded thra plays all in wan evenin', an' they were all iv thim Aixeillint, upliftin', and well dun. By th' well selieted audjience prisint, I cud till at wunoe thet no pains had bin shpared tu make 'th' produeshuns faymus throo th' lingth an' brith iv th' land. I woz glad tu find mesilf whir-r I cud du viry keerful obsarvin'. Th' fir-rst ixhibishun tu be perfarmed wuz wan iv a sintimintal an' dhramatik nachoor. Lookin' on me progrim, I saw it wuz written by a ledy iv th' name iv Jinnie Smith. It wuz a play showin' how difyeult it is f'r wimmin to keep shtillg but ther tungs were held back by th' idee iv a new dhress f'r an approehun weddin'. Becuz iv th' quare acshuns which they hed to go throo, th' nayboors conelooded they hed sum kind iv peshtilinee an' th' helth offiser wuz called, but it all inded in a gineral reeoneillyashun. . Hinnissey, it wuz in this play thet Retehil Harbur, Gleddis Heyden, Lorin Loois, an' Howr-rd Ray made ther futur-rg an' th' City iv Blumin'tun wil-l sind furwurd an army iv players. The nixt play wuz Th' Unixpioted Guests by Willyum Dean Howells. 'Twas here shown eoncloosivly that womin is nachurly a pervarieater. A womin invites a number iv eupples to hev dhinner with her an' her husbind. Th' frinds all begin to come, an' tu th' sorrer iv th' hostis, an unixpieted cupple come. Th' hostis pertinded that she hed ixpieted them, whin indade she hed n't. Thin Hin- nissy, th' poor ledy wuz in thrubel. But her val'unt man hilped her out. An' it all inded by the' hostis raydin' the unixpieted guests' note iv ixeiptince instid iv rayfuzal as she hed thot. The ithieal valyoo iv the dhrama. wuz here appharint thet nhonisty is th' bist polyeyf' This play projooced tu blazin' lights in Hazel Smith and Frasher McIntosh who will hereafther, I im thold, make ther livin' on th' stage. Thin Hinnissy, I shtarted to go but a fellow thold me ther wuz anither play. I thot he wuz wan iv th' frishmin thryin' tu kid me, bu whin I looked on me pro- grim, ther wuz wan an' it wuz called Set in Turkquoisf' Th' seen wuz layed in Oryintal parts an' the seenery wuz butayful. Tl1is play had a viry complyeated p-lot. Th' Count made a wayger wid th' Countis thet he will not be jilous iv her. She wid th' hilp iv a gir-rl frind ar-rouse th' jilousy iv th' Count so much thet he choked th' aeeumplace iv the Countis. It wuz so thrue tu liff thet I lifted me sate to interfare in behilf iv th' ledy, but wuz called to me sinses by th' kindness iv a mimber pullin' me by me coat tail. Thin the Countis explayned an' got an imirild nieeklis as th' wayger. The wurruds iv the seen, wuz large, mouth-iillin, an' poetic. Mr. Fir-rohmin wuz lookin' f'r Earl Ewert and Hilin Parmilee but ther parints objietid to ther beeomin' perfesshunils, an' ther ye ar-re. The plays wuz th' bist T ,iver seen and the admishun wuz only fiftayne cints, an' by th' time th' perfarmers hev perfarmed a ye-er more, large silaries will be watin' f'r thim. E 27

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THE AEGIS and we had two big deer l1ounds. One mornin' we wakes up and everything war white. We thought we'd spend the day loaiin' but when Hank Evans the war the eookj goes to git brekfust he. says: 'By Jinks, boys! it's a. bad day out, but I reckon its rustle for yer eats'. Sure 'nough there warn't 'nough meat for two men let alone four, and two hungry dogs. It war snowin' purty hard so we didn't take the dogs but depended on ourselves. It seemed to git colder all the time and all the game must have been in shelter for I didn't see none. I war jist about to give it up when I see somethin' standin' up aginst a big rock. I knowed it war a deer so I shot, and run up to the rock and thar he war, a time fat un. I cut his throat and let the blood run and then I slung him acrost my back and started fer home. I hadn't gone more'n a mile when I heard a howl that made me shiver and you'd orter seen me make tracks. It war the pack howl of a. wolf and I knowed that purty quick there would be a. bunch arter me Yow see they had been huntin' and had found the blood of my game. Purty soon I hear 'em in all directions and all makin' for that spot and then they took up the tra.il. I didn't want to give up my dinner, so I started to run jist as fast as I could. They kep' gittin' nearer all the time and I knowed I would git the worst of it, if I didn't drop that deer, but I held on. Purty soon I looked back and seen the leader about fifteen hundred feet back of me. I hadn't gone more'n half a mile since I first heard 'em and here they war already. Well say, do you know I jist barely clumb a tree when they war all around me. There war only one shell in my gun and I killed one of 'em but while I war' loa.din', I had the muzzle turned downwards and one of them critters jumped up and knocked it out o' my hand. There I war, up in a tree and my gun 'on the ground. I begin to holler for help. I knowed I eouldn't be very far from the shack and I thought mebbe they'd hear me. Well I was up there for purty near an hour I reckon and it war mighty cold, cramped up in there 'atween two limbs. My legs war gittin' numb and I war so hoarse that I couldn't hardly holler but I kefp' it up. I war jist about ready to go to sleep Qthat's the way you do when you are freezin'j when I heard a crashin' and all of a sudden a big bull moose come tearin' through the brush with three or four wolves after him. It had stopped snowin' and the game had begun to stir a.gin. This moose had come onto us by accident and the first thing I know of, ever' one of them wolves war after him full tilt. I stayed up in the tree till I couldn't hear 'em bay any more and then I clumb down' kinder ea.sy7like and picked up my gun. ' ' I warn't bothered no more that day 'cause all the wolves had gone after easier game. I went home and there war all the fcllers sittin' down eatin' a good dinner. They all had purty good luck and there war 'nough meat to last us a week. When I told 'em about it you ortcr heard 'em laugh 'cause I let a dumb brute take my gun away from me. Did they get the buck ? asked George. A 'fHow would I know, boyg but I'll tell you what I do klnow: I'm goin' to bed. It was bedtime and soon nothing was heard but the heavy breathing of the sleepers. 29'