Berlin High School - Lamp Yearbook (Berlin, CT)

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Jack Ulkus, the new politician under Stalin relating, Why you should join the Communist party. As we listened to his speech we heard him say, What have you to lose? With David Clark (ivinsky), the atomic physicist, we shall create a bomb vich vill surpass all other bombs. With our secretaries, Joan Daigle, Catherine Rossi, Lucille Malone, and Betty D'Amico, who can take dictation at five hundred words a minute, our Comintern will progress faster than any other government in the world. That I promise. India! Our latest report reveals that our little Norwegian lass and lover of biology, Ann Karlsen, has put her magic to work on snakes. She sits on the steps of the Shah's palace blowing her magic flute as the snakes twine around her neck. Inside the palace sits Donald Barrett with his harem of women, including his favorite, Jeanine Drouin, assisted by Audrey Cooney, Tina Marino, Alice Gall-not, Janet Kullman, and Betty Knight, who keep up the life of the party. Cairo, Egypt! A new method of preserving mummies has been discovered by Richard Fiori, and his assistant Bob Dornfried. Research on the subject was done by Helen Konefal, under the direction of Donald Falcetti, the greatest mortician of the United States. From Sweden comes the news that Betty Blom-gren is living in solitude in a castle high in the mountains. Once a year she is entertained by a renowned group of clowns, namely: Bobbie Davis, George Cable, and Johnnie Padelli, from the newly formed circus. Frances Recck thrills Betty with her daring acrobatic feats. Back once more to the United States. We have been receiving numerous reports about the ability of our ace detective Slick McMurray and his aid Jeannie Langdon. In their latest case they caught a notorious gang of shoplifters, the biggest operators in New York City. Now we will adjourn a moment while Fred Guite, our announcer, tells us about that super-duper new Suzie wave for football players. We hear our former star football player, Phil Tinsley, suggested this to keep the hair out of the player's eyes. The Catskill Mountains now loom up before us. Seated on the very top is Billy Cole. Curiosity led Bill to take up his abode in these mountains, for when he was asked if he had ever seen the Catskill Mountains, Bill replied that he had only seen cats kill rats. Texas. Flash! Prices on chickens are definitely decreasing since Jane Conger opened her chicken farm. With the aid of Bob Lenois and Lucy Leone, her right hand helpers, the chickens get expert care. Double flash! A trip is now run by Dick Avery and Louis DeVivo from the United States to Canada. They can boast of being the only fellows who ever succeeded in seating 17 persons in a Ford , thereby accomplishing a feat that would make Henry Ford smile in dismay. Dick and Louis never use a speedometer. Speed is reckoned by physical phenomena. At a speed of 10 miles per hour the fenders rattle, at 15 the driver's teeth rattle, and at 20 the gold fillings fall out. And that concludes our broadcast for today. You have been listening to station WACK. After Thought These scenes may never be thus; 'Tis but with fun we wrote; Prophetic vision tells us None will our thoughts misquote. Signed: ANNE PATTERSON JANET AUSTIN Your mysfic eyes for 1949. 21

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CLASS PROPHECY We interrupt this broadcast to bring you the latest news from station WACK. Flash! Hot off the wires! Around the world with our snooping reporter, Audrey Barber. To bring you today's commentary, we present the second Louella Parsons, Gloria Hardisty. Bulletin from Rome! Proceeding up the street whom should we meet but Ralph Meyer, standing in his golden chariot arguing with Georgius Pollardius (alias George Pollard) over the contest in the arena between Frankie Hercules Nolan and Douglas Nelson. In the Senate House we see none other than Paul Kornichuk, a startling figure in a white tunic, orating vigorously for the rights of the Roman people. But before Paul can say another word, we feel a rumble under our feet. Run for your lives, an earthquake, is the cry heard by all. And so Rome fell. Why, you ask? Of course, because Anne Patterson hiccoughed. Flash! Flash! Across the wires to Paris. Mary DiCenzo is suing the famous hair connoisseur, Stanley Zipadelli, for damages. While giving Miss DiCenzo a permanent wave. Monsieur Zipadelli accidentally spilled a chemical on her hair, causing it to fall out. Also in Paris we hear that Charles Genovese, the cassonova, is still wowing the girls. On our nightly tour to one of the ritzy Casinos on the Riviera, owned by Richard Luddy, we were entertained by dancer Doris Treece and the lilting crooner Carl Focareto. Cigarette girl Pat Brennan, presented us with a package of Chesterfields; so round, so firm, so fully packed. Since we had been informed by our French teacher. Miss McBrien, never to miss going to a great Parisian opera or symphony, we spent the following afternoon at the Edifice de Musique where we met Thomas Dennis, Linda Wickland, Jane Barber, and Robert Brown, who had just flown over in Connie Vandrilla's newly designed super-sonic transport. You can imagine our surprise when Kenneth Schultz, the long-haired violinist, stepped onto the podium. But that's not all. To accompany him Doris Welz and Faye Gooding, the world-famous metzo soprano, sang his newly composed, Aria to Berlin. We always had been told that Paris was a place for fanatics, but we never quite believed it. However, as we left the theater we bumped into poet Aline Silsby, muttering this to herself: It was a winter day in summer. The snow was raining fast, A bare-foot boy with shoes on. Was skating on the grass. From that time on we knew anything could happen in Paris. London! After practicing as a teacher for a few years, Marty Thomson could not resist the lure of the stage. Marty prefers life behind the headlights. She has starred in the following Shakesperian plays: Hamlet, Egglet, Omelet, and Eyelet—every time Marty played in Hamlet she got Egglet in the Eyelet. Irene Pipkin and Lillian Radion own a large glove store in Lancaster. We were surprised to learn that they dealt with such unsalable articles, for gloves are made to be kept on the hand. Barbara Margnelli is a successful novelist. Her best book, The Romance of a Sour Pickle , has caused mouth watering comments all over England. Russia, next stop. Before we had gone far towards Moscow, we saw a crowd of people gathered about a man standing on a soap box, who was frantically waving his arms in the air. Out of pure curiosity we stopped, and whom should we recognize but 20

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SENIOR CLASS HISTORY Fresh men September 23—Initiation today. Went to the football game in war paint. November 20—Senior reception this afternoon. Big success. (Party was free) March 22—Roller skating party. Ohl My achin' back!!! June 18—Class Picnic. Nice way to close the year. ter 3 , -M U S°ci° y ' ' 00s. °y P G0 d SUc ss, d°«ce 9o c Rush . ' One Ji “PrU A®e -. un 'Or, e6 • c °°rn c®. ’ a, 01 7 l'e Seniors September 24—Freshman initiation and reception. Sweet revenge! October 22- Harvest Ho-Down, big success. Loads of fun. March 17-18—Senior Class Play, Gangway for Ghosts. Spooky! June 3—Senior Ball. Gooding and Genovese produce second smash hit. Commencement Week—Senior Banquet. Good food, anyway. Class Day. Fond farewells. Graduation. Oh Happy Dayl