Bennett Medical College - Em Dee Yearbook (Chicago, IL)

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Wi All if i fx ,i gl f 1 Doctor- Who was your doctor? Patient- DL lVlCClurg. Doctor- What l-:ind of idiotic advice did he give you? Patient- He advised me to send for you. As toward them the exam days came fly- ing, ln terror for text hooks they fled: For something within them was crying, You must show up now, or you're dead. The naked hills lie wanton to the hreezeg The fields are nude, the groves un- frocked: Bare are the limbs of shameless treesg No wonder that the corn is shocked! Full many a man, both young and old, Has gone to his sarcophagus By pouring water. icy cold, A-down his hot esophagus. l wrote to the college and asked how my boy Dick was getting along, and where he slept nights. What did they say? They wrote back saying, Dick is all right: he sleeps in classes during the day: but we are unable to learn where he sleeps nights, U30 ,-

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BEANS. A student was I at college you see, My purse was always light. l dined at places where lunches were free To get rid of my apetite. l discovered, however, this couldn't last, You had to spend money or git. So I bought me a peck of navy beans, And started right home with it. l soaked two pounds for one whole day, And cool-:ed them in a pot. l cooked them several hours or more. Then ate them while red hot. I decided that beans were a student's dish And not very expensive eating. A couple of pounds would go a long way Toward reducing the cost of living. But after six meals of this wonderful food l could not eat so well. My appetite suddenly disappeared, And l craved for something swell. So l decided they're not a student's dish. They are better in the can. And if you wish to economize, Do not use my subtle plan. Beans, beans, glorious beans, They pack in snug and tight. There they remain, and remain, and remain 'Till dislodged with dynamite. -C. E. BOYER, 'l6. ,- ff' t ,, A , gap- .- 2' ' ifllf , ,Q 6 lpn s 'gl I nu' W f MV: Y fi. I' ,I A .V n 1 r Q' A N , , ff' 5' , x . ff! N J 5 1- I 1 ' r x iffy. W ' f..lUgSp p-rvraofs W 1' , U The BcLu.Lled SUUJQHLU lr-H,

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::ivWm . Now lVlary's famous lamb is shorn, And shivering, poor brute, While Nlary dons each winter morn A brand new union suit. First, man invented clothing And then invented cooksg And then, to earn our loathing, The wretch invented books. And still, not quite contented With normal day and night, He turned in and invented The artificial light! Lives of proteins all remind us They may make their lives sublime: And in dying leave behind them Fat men on the shores of time. Little pounds of sugar Nlixed with grains of sand. Malte the grocer's bank roll Gradually expand. Little schemes of Wiley, The graft to undermine, And soon that grocer's bank roll ls used to pay his fine. We were, we know not why, begot: We are, while here, we know not what. We go at last we know not where. For the where. the why, the what and when Are mysteries beyond our ken. H. WIGMORE, M. D. nl work because I love my work: But let it here be stated- l would not love it if my love Were not reciprocatedf' Of all sad Words from the tongues of men, The saddest are these: 'You're Hunked againf H Lives of freshmen all remind us, Things that are seen when in their prime: All they lack is growth and culture- They'll come out all right some time. Motto- Work like Helen B. Happy. Aeroplanine fnew all-zaloidj. Dose, one drop fusually fatalj. Antidote-Pick out a soft green spot fgroup of freshiesl or a body of H20. 231