Benjamin School for Girls - Tusitala Yearbook (New York, NY)

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TUSITALA FOR 1928 ---------- If a male goose we call a gander A male moose must be a mander If one who fails is a failure One who quails is a quailure. If a female duke is a duchesse A female spook is a spuchesse If drinking too hard makes a drunkard Does thinking too hard make a thunkard? OUR SENIORS LUCILLE MENSCHEL I They do not know who Caesar was Nor when Columbus sailed the seas Cine may, for all she says or does Think Botticelli is a cheese- Now gentle reader, don't commence To say you think it is a pity To live in ignorance so dense- You see-they're pretty. II They'll tell you Socialisrns l'Cute Because a friend whois rather plain Is lecturing from here to Butte- And has so many in her train- They cannot tell what is meant By the philosophy of Ibsen- But theirs is beauty that is blent- Theyire Fisher-Gibson. III Of differential calculus- They may discourse in language c ear Until at last-it comes to us- They mean an automobile gear But-Sigh not that they must dwell alone Their ignorance don't pity They know all that need be known You see-theylre pretty.

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L TUSITALA HEROES? ADELAIDE SALOMON We all think that Lindbergh had courage, And Columbus was brave on the seas, That Sir Francis Drake was a hero, And that Grant commanded with ease. For bravery Peary was noted, He discovered the chilly North Pole, Abe Lincoln was known for his honor, For his justness and kindness untold. Of course all these men were great heroes, They had valor and courage galore, But one man surpasses these others, The window cleaner on the top floor! CLEMENTINE HARRIET FREEMAN Your eyes are like the dew-drops, The corn flowers in the lane, The heavens in the morning, The flowers after rain. Your lips are sweet and loving Your hair like gold new spun, Your teeth are sparkling diamonds, Lying glistening in the sun. When I embrace your softness, And gaze in your eyes divine, H I'm proud to know that you're my dog, My darling Clementine. LINES TO A DENTIST LILLIAN GRUBER Oh, dentist, you heartless extractor, Purveyor of pains none too few, Professor courageous of torture of ages, I hate you, I hate you, I do. I've learned to abhor and despise you From earliest days of my youth, You used on a molar, Your painless controller, But, goodness! You pulled the wrong tooth. FOR If-728 L Page Seven-ty

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f -- TUSITALA FOR 1928 Rzzila N.-I'm not going to be married until I'm thirty-five. Ruth B.-I'm not going to be thirty-five until I'm married. Stzzdent.-Do you talk in your sleep? Mm Wagg.-No, but I often talk in other peoples sleep. Student.-How's that? Mifr Wegg.-Ilm an English teacher. Mirr Hufztevz' fin European History Classj Ethel, who invented the steam engine? Ell9elLaml1e1'g: fnot hearingj What? fwattj. Mlfr Hzzlzzfer: Thatis right! . Mr. Solomon: Conduct, badg reading, badg composition, algebra, Latin, bad--bad- bad. What's the meaning of this, Sallie? V Sallie: I cannot understand it, Daddy-Do you think it might be a forgery? Helen Geller: Did you really understand the scientific lecture you heard last night? Adele He1'rir0n.' No,-but that didn't matter. I had a free ticket. Latin Teeclaer: Slave, where is thy horse? Szffzrtled Senior: 'lIt's in mydesk, but I wasn't using it. Page Seventy-Two