Belfast High School - Memoirs Yearbook (Belfast, OH)

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An undertaker found a donkey lying dead in front of his premises and went to inform the pvlice. What am I to do with it? he asked the officer in charge. The officer had a sense of humor. Do with it? he asked with a grin. Bury it, of course. You're an undertaker, aren't you? That's true, replied the undertaker, but I thought it only right to come around and inform the relatives first. Assault and Battery Mrs. Newlywed: We hadn't been married a week when he hit me with a piece of sponge cake. Judge: Disorderly conduct. Five dollars and cost. Mrs. Newlywed: QSobbingj And I made the cake with my own hands. Judge: Assault with a deadly weapon ------- ONE YEAR. Anyone not able to pay, and stating so, will be buried free of charge. When her baby cried so loudly Mrs. Smith felt obligated to drop everything and investigate. Tommy , she called downstairs, What is the matter with your little brother? I-Ie's crying because I'm eating my cake and won't give him any, Tommy replied. ls his cake finished yet? Sure--and he cried while I was eating that too. DoctorZ Doctor! screamed the hospital patient, why have my shades been drawn and rny room darkened? There's a fire across the street, replied the doctor, and we were guarding against your waking up and thinking your operation had been a failure. Shopper: May I try on that tweed suit in the window? Salesman: Certainly, lady, but we'd rather you used the dress- ing room. The minister's sermon will be How Can We Deal With The World Crisis? and Mrs. Jones will sing Search Me, Oh God . Have you ever appeared as a witness before?- Yes, your honor. In what suit? My blue serge. DONALD KE LLE Y Z2

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. s '?,29FX5i2?'Ef57 '1fTi-'ilffif Jokes The hunter was showing off his collection of trophies to a group of visitors. He was explaining how he had acquired the various exhibits. See that elephant? he said, I shot it in my pajamas. My goodness, murmured the surprised young lady, how did it get in there? fTeacher trying hard to unfasten coat for little pupil.J Did your mother hook this coat for you? lPupilj No, Ma'am. She bought it. Shopper: I like the cloth material, but not the design. Shop Clerk: Don't worry about that, Madam. After you have washed this once, the design will disappear. Motorist Qln dense fog, after crashing into driver aheadjz Why don't you signal when you're going to stop? Znd Motorist: Why should I? I'm in my own garage! Pilot: Wanna fly? Coed: Oooeoh, very much. Pilot: Wait, I'll catch you one.' Prof.: You can't sleep in my class! Student: I know it. I've been trying for an hour. ' Visitor: What a glorious painting. I wish I could take those lovely colors home with me. Painter: You will. You re sitting on my palette. It says here that in some parts of the world fish are used for money. That so? Must be awfully messy putting them in gum machines. Young Mother: Why so gloomy? Young Father: I was just thinking, here we spend a year trying to get the baby to talk, and the next twenty trying to get her to shut up. He: I see that in London a man is run over every half hour . She: Poor fellow . Z1

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Around About School The gossip around the Junior Class is that all the girls are getting kissed but, Mary E., just the class play kids. Leo: just what is interesting about the- seventh and eighth grade this year. We have been noticing a certain young lady who is just dying to be a Sophomore, aren't you, Lula. Fellows, How's Halloween? I have heard a 1ot's been going on around Belfast. So beware of people with guns. Especially Mr. Glauner. Riley, why watch the door, Mr. Freemen's gone. It has been estimated that the Seniors now have the brightest gang of kids in school. They even have the smartest boys--when it comes to teasing and joking. After the past IZ long years, the Seniors now discover, that their one and only Pete is among the graduating class of 1950. Folks, a great occasion is about to appear. Our only Joyce Eakins is about to be wed to that handsome Harry Phillips from the city of Berrysville. Gee, that Helene Edingfield sure has a sit in with the Freshmen. Benny, how is this. Warnock's been to Texas--guess what she saw. Oh: a great big foot- ball player. She says she's going back in a year or two. And fellows, I doubt if she'll come back anymore. FLASHZ Wai-nock's changed her mind about Texas. It's Berrysville or bust. Did the Seniors a few nights back have a wiener roast and skating party? Did all the boys but two work out a plan to get all the wieners, leaving behind poor little Pete and Ed with nothing but a gang of girls. Richard, what do you mean letting Pete swipe your girl at a certain basketball game. Bob Williams, what do you mean flirting with Anna Dodds, and letting her wear that flashy red sweater? I know a certain young fellow who is as jealous as he can be, isn't he, Anna? Richard Walker! haven't heard? There's a certain girl in your class, who is dying for a date with you. Mary, just what is this about M. Daglier being late for church. Dora Bell and Shirley REALLY have something on each other now. I heard they are both dating the same boy. And you know it couldn't be any- body else but that Dick Clemens. Riley, why do you always laugh when Kelley does. He hasn't figured out what he's laughing about yet. Couple of the Senior girls have -found out that Pete, Daune, and Benny have girl friends in Belfast High. When asked who they are, this was their reply. Pete said, my girl is medium height and pretty, and a Juniorg Benny said, mine is a Sophomore and is slie fine, tall, and handsome, and beautiful eyes and hair g and Daune said, mine's a Freshman, bet your boots Before school started Mary Alice's heart was everywhere, then it crept into the Farm Bureau, and now it has landed in the Shaffer Super Mar- ket , Charles is there, too. It has been fully explained to me that Ed's girl at Seaman has deserted him for another man. Ed, divorce herl By Leota Edingfield Z3