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Page 26 text:
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The Cr uci! TD TF ° Day City JUN (all (5@ a D. [43] , The Spring Delusion T SEEMS that Lord Alfred Tennyson, poet laureate of England in his day, started some- thing when in an emotional moment he composed Lockley Hall, which has in its body the immortal couplet: “In the Spring a livelier iris changes on the burnish’d dove; In the Spring a young man's fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love.” Since the day this blithe and flowery quotation was foisted upon an unsuspecting public, it has been employed by hundreds of writers in their description of that pleasant season in the year. From the time in the year when the first robin dares to life a peep, budding authors and seasoned scribblers, who should know better, all over the land resurrect this saying, enlarge upon it, bring about new variations, steal upon it from some new angle, and chen pass it off to their readers as an original thought. Far be it from me co cast reflections on the intelligence and good intentions of that honored gentleman, who was the originator of chat statement, but were Lord Tennyson’s corpse able to see what he started, it would turn over in its grave in horror—Yes, I believe it would do a double flip. The saying has been passed on from generation to generation until today it is practically accepted as a proved axiom. It may have had its place in the romance loving age when it was first originated, but it hardly seems to fit in this hectic day and age of speed and hurry. Did Mr. Tennyson in propogating his theory—for that is all ic may be classed until it is proved—get the opinions of the young men of his country on the subject? No straw vote was taken as I recall. So it seems that the English bard has rashly taken it for granted that he knew the sentiments of the male youth. Ic is a pity that he were not able to seek the council of such an authority as Dorothy Dix. He was not a young man any longer at the time chat he coined the expression, so he would not have any grounds,for an argument encrey- rec is very apt to discount the period of youth and look back on it as a period of frivolty. Being a young man myself, I believe that | am able to look at the subject from an ideal viewpoint. And J think chat I have the backing of many other young men who have been maligned by the statement. Is the spring—as Lord ‘Tennyson would have it—any more Conductive to love chanthe summer. autumn) or winter’? I dowbr ic. The springtseason is a period of turbulent change. It opens with che blustering month of March when the raw winds sweep down from che North and effectually discourage any love making on the part of the said young man. Ic, in turn, is followed by the damp, foggy, rainy, and unhealth- ful month of April. A wet skin is far from being an inspirer of romance. And wading in mud does not help ic much either. Next comes the month of May with its tropical rain- falls and more discomfort merging into June, which just as ic becomes enjoyable and con- genial becomes the summer season. No sane young man is going to think of anything, let alone love, when he is baked on one day and frozen to death on another. Weather conditions are ideal in the spring, continues the song of the poets and sooth- sayets. Have they overlooked the fact that for every fair day in the spring, there are three on the summer? And in the autumn there are as many balmy days as spring ever had. May 1 go on? Has Lord Tennyson ever attended a sleighride party in the crisp outdoor air of winter? Or has he ever sat before an open fireplace and listened to the roar of the elements on the outside? It appears that he has not. | am not condemning spring as a total killer of romance, True, there are very many spring evenings that are cut out for love-making. But ‘t seems ludicruous to set one season aside and label it as the one in which Cupid makes his biggest killings. This is not a mere treatise to show that spring is a disagreeable season. Merely do | wish to get justice for the other seasons. It is time that Lord Tennyson's false maxim should be revised. Here is the way it should read: When in the mood in the Spring, Summer, Autumn, or Winter, a young man’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love.
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Page 25 text:
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-- l@talids, (Sid Vala Ble The Nut-Cracker TIS May, 1931, and the Crucible year book has come out. Students stand around in groups, whispering excitedly. An angry group collects around locker No. ..... waiting. But nobody comes. For the Nutcracker is smart enough to stay home this day of days, and there he sits, chortling and fiendishly laughing. The scene is in front of Locker No. —.... , the academic abode of the Nutcracker. A number of students stand about. It is just before noon. Bill Groening: I told you so! It wasn’t me—now you better apologize for chat shiner Vou Pavermes last wtiday prebmmary 30rhy 1981, =A -b, Herb Bean: Ha! Good old Brams—I knew ’twas him all along. Ruth LeRoux: I was hoping the Nutcracker would be a handsome, dashing man, ahhhuhhhummmmm.... | ance Awe Aaa ee ee: Marion Meisel: | knew all along that he was a young German Student. Harry Connelly: Pershnally, I haven’t got a thing t’say—shintz I’m still a Republican. Mearle Willett: After | had made a scientific examination of the situation, I knew who it was, because according to the facts unconsciously submitted to the unwary reader by the author of said column, and under act no. 1586 P. A. 1916, Michigan, the defendant is also subject to trial for schnitzling. De Kahn: My Pal-phooey!!!! Archie McMillan: The facts in the case show that there is no chance for error. If you should read whoosiz on Pht, you would see that there is no room for doubt that the man is guilty of gjkimbgfxxsting, if not blrgstnding. Jack Nichols: All I can say is—that wuz adequate! Helen Severance: Huh? Freddie Tonks: Hel - lo, there, ' 2 . $')oca!? '? The mob turns and makes a rush for the door, where the foolish author hereof has chanced to enter, There is a thickening Sud. The crowd passes through the door, a writhing figure carried above. Shricks of goulish glee rent the atmosphere—it might have sold the atmos- phere, but good old atmo couldn't furni sh a down payment. The figure is carried to the flag- pole, where that object is lifted and let fall on the head of the unfortunate several times. But they have failed to reckon on one thing—the head. Disgusted with this, they carry him up the tower. A horrified world watches breathlessly below as they realize what is about to happen. A figure rises into the air, and falls over the side. A lone scream is heard from the mob—apparently a woman's, but since no further trace could be made, ventriloquism is sus- pected. Ihe body flies out, clearing the walls. Women hide their heads. Men begin to re- pent. Everyone looks another direction, but when no thickening sud is heard, they turn again to see our sheer ho foat gracefully down (under a Doty (p’t’d) portable umbrella which he had concealed in his pocket), just in time to have the keys to the city of Fghjbdsmkl presented him by the mayor, who has been awaiting his arrival ever since the Freshmen engineers’ as- sembly, April 21, 1931, A. D. which so bored him that he was ready to do anything, even to listen to the discussion at a Freshman English lecture, every Friday at 8:00 A. M. Eastern Standard Time, if you live in Bay City? ee)
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