Barrie Central Collegiate Institute - Vox Collegii Yearbook (Barrie, Ontario Canada)

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Page 64 VOX COLLEGII June1935 A GOOD JOB Frank Muir- What have you been doing all summer? Perry Ryan- I had a position in my father's office. And you? Frank- I wasnit working, either. One End As Good As Another Mr. Scott- Harold, why are you always at the bottom of the class? Harold-'Alt really doesn't matter. dad, you get the same instructions at both ends. NOT IF HE'S A GOOD SHOT Do you think he will miss me? sang the entertainer in a cracked voice. If he does, he ought never to be trusted with a gun again, shouted one of the irate audience. ADOLESCENT LAUGHTER Bill Norman- Why does a stork stand on one foot? Wallace Coutts - I'll bite, why does he? Bill Norman- lf he'd lift the oth- er foot, he'd fall down. Miss Kelso fafter several periods explaining the functional values of X and YJ- Are there any ques- tions? Harold Patterson fmuch puzzled! -- Please, ma'am, would that work with A and B? It was in the classroom of 4A His- tory. Miss MacDougall looked out upon a group of eager faces as she put the question, And now, can any oi you tell me what is a stoic? Only one hand went up. Does only Allan Patterson know what a stoic is? Silence fper usuall. Well, Allan, tell your classmates. Allan - A stoic is a bird that brings babies. DIPLOMATIC Wallace Coutts - You ARE a lucky man, father. Papa Coutts- Why, my boy? Wallace- You won't have to buy any school books for me next year. I'm to stay in the same form. I I l E x I N t Could If He Hadn't Miscalculated The driver of a F-D car speeded out across the street and struck the street car squarely amidships. The street car conductor got off to in- vestigate and collect evidence for his official report. What's the matter with you? the conductor asked the driver. Don't you know you can't run under my car with your top up? GROWING Jim Stephens- Dad, give me a nickel. Papa Stephens- Why, James, you are too old to be asking for a nickel. Jim - 0.K. then, how about a. dime? ' Miss Henry was just in the midst of her grammar lesson discussing the proper use of sit and set, Notic- ing George Thompson was not pay- ing attention, she said to him, George, which is correct? 'A hen is sitting' or A hen is setting'. G.T.- I don't know and I don't care. All I bother about is when she cackles-Then I want to know 'Is she laying, or is she lying'?' Ralph and Enid were Walking through the fields when they noticed a cow and a calf rubbing noses in bovine love. Ralph spoke up: The sight of that makes me want to do the same thing. Enid- Go ahead, it's father's cow. ' CONCLUSIVE A quack doctor was holding forth about his medicines to a rural au- dience. Yes, gentlemen, he said, I have sold these pills for over 25 years and never heard a word of complaint. Now, what does that prove? ' From a voice in the crowd came: That dead men tell no tales. Francis Hinds treading his own story?- It was a dark night, two forms crept out of a house-the clock struck one. A Betty Murphy Cbored listener?- Which one? .L WEBB - FOR BOYS' WEAR - ALLANDALE - Phone 178

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1935 VOX COLLEGII Pg 6 SMART LUGGAGE FOR THIS COMING VACATION For LADIES-Sta-Paks and Overnight Cases For MEN-Gladstone Bags and Club Bags W. R. ALLEN LEZIZTIESSEQREQIE elm. rs fQBg535 Ev BOATS, CANOES, 1 OUTBOARDS, TENTS SAILING DINGHYS FOR HIRE -- Excellent Schools SAVVS FILED -- Fine Churches Skates Sharpened -- Good Stores SPECIAL RATES BY '-'- Beautiful Homes WEEK OR MONTH RECREATION Foot Mulcaster St. FOI' All TQISJECS Telephone 431 69 Elizabeth St. W. D. MINNIKIN Funeral Director AMBULANCE SERVICE DAY OR NIGHT Fine Boots and Shoes at Reasonable Prices EMPKE HARDWARE - QUALITY AND SERVICE

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