Avon High School - Boomerang Yearbook (Avon, IL)

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 THE BOOMERANG HEREAFTER The last thing I remember was being lowered into my grave. When I regained the use of my faculties I was facing a new world. And whom do you suppose I saw? There were two beautiful angels gently playing upon harps. When they came closer I was surprised to find that they were Evelyn Niles and Grace Potter, classmates of mine way back in 1929. After all these years I was overjoyed to see them. Hello, Lach, old kid, they cried. Glad to see you. We'll show you around this joint. Business hasn't been so good lately, so we have plenty of time and will let you see your old classmates. You were lucky; you arc the last one to kick off. I’d sure like to sec the old gang again. I haven't seen some of the bunch since our class reunion in 1929, I replied. Well, here's the old cut-up, Louis Palmer, they said. I found that he had spent a successful life as a truant officer for a correspondence school in Borneo. He was now assistant to St. Peter at the Pearly Gates Then I found the great athlete, Bert Alden. After being the Governor of Georgia for fifty vears he had passed from that world and was now St. Pete's right hand cop. Presently I ran across Rea Walker in the role of Justice of the Peace He told me that he had represented Illinois in the Senate for many years before taking up his present abode. He also introduced me to Eula Buck, who was his stenographer. As we ambled on through the Holy City, another sweet faced angel appeared, and it was none other than Juanita Sebrcc. The three angels then rendered a beau- tiful song entitled Lace Up Your Shoe, Your Tongue's Hanging Out. That was mighty fine, girls; but how did you learn to sing so well?” Oh, we ll have to show you our instructor, they cried. They led me to the conservatory; and there was my old pal Donald Hatch, teach- ing angels how to sing. Talking with him, I found that he had been a great opera singer in Central Africa until his voice broke. Well, girls, where do we eat? was my next question. They took me to a lunch room around the corner. There Urith Cutforth dished me out some beans. She had established a chain of Maid-Rite lunch rooms all over the Sahara Desert. I picked up a paper to glance at the stock quotations on cat guts for harp strings, and to my surprise Bernadinc Spurgeon was the editor of the paper. I immediately looked her up and had a lone talk with her. Although she would say little con- cerning herself, I gathered that she had been a very popular short-storv writer and journalist in Labrador. While 1 was there, Alf Raymond dropped in He had been the business manager of a large electric fan corporation in Siberia and was now the president of the Last National Bank. A life of leisure and a life of laziness are tuo things.

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THE BOOMERANG GERTRUDE EVELYN MILLS Trudie Bucyrus, Ohio, Public Schools, '25; Declamatory contest, '27, '28; Glee Club, '21, '28, '29; Vice-president of the Junior class, '28; Glee Club Concert, '28; Her Step-Husband,” '29; Oration, '29; Cal- endar Editor of The Boomerang, '29. Happiness is a rare cosmetic BERT THEODORE ALDEN Aldy Avon Public Schools, '25; President of the Freshman class, '26; President of the Sophomore class, '27; Basket ball, '26, '27, '28, '29; Captain of the basket ball team, '28; Smile, Rodney, Smile, '28; Glee Club, '28; Glee Club Concert, '28; Track '26, '27, '28, '29; Tennis, '27, '28, '29; Advertising Manager of The Boom- erang. ''Consider the postage stamp! Its value lies m sticking to a thing until it gets there. URITH ELVYN CUTFORTH Avon Public Schools, '25; Vocal Con- test, '26. 'll; Glee Club '26, '11, '28, '29; Lass of Limerick Town, '26; Carrie Comes to College, '11; Glee Club Con- cert, '28; Smile, Rodney, Smile, '28; Orchestra, '28, '29; Snapshot Editor of The Boomerang, '29. Live, laugh, and dance. Some day you can't A little neglect may breed great mischief

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THE BOOMERANG In the afternoon I took in a show. You can imagine my delight to find Carvl Witter the heroine of the talkie movie. When her golden voice came to me, it brought hack the good old times we had in school. Inquiring of my guides, I learned that Caryl had become a famous movie actress and had found happiness after she married her seventh husband. The vaudeville presented a delightful dancing act featuring Doris Lemon. After the show 1 interviewed her long enough to find out that she had been a very popular singer and dancer in deaf, dumb, and blind schools. The next act was a very good piano solo, and the player turned out to be Gertrude Mills. I was unable to talk with her; but from her looks, she had had a very happy life. Coming out of the theater, I had the misfortune to be struck by an automobile driven by Catharine Gillett. She had been verv gossiping with Lucy Shumaker and had failed to see me. However, I was uninjured, so I got up and begged their pardon for getting in their wav. They were glad to sec me and told me all their lives. Cath- arine had discovered and perfected a practical route to Mars, which made her a multi-billionaire. Lucy had been successful as a housekeeper for absent minded professors. I guess I have seen all the gang now, I said to Evelyn. Now where do I sleep»? Oh, you don't get to stay here, she replied. Well, where do I go from here, then? I asked. I’ll show you the way, volunteered Grace. They took me to an elevator door, and who do you suppiose was the elevator boy? None other than Mac, our old janitor. I bade the friendly angels good-bvc and stepped into the compartment. Just then I was very shocked to hear Mac say, Going down. Lachlan Crissev Think of saving as well as getting.