Auburn High School - Trojan / Oracle Yearbook (Auburn, IL)

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THE ORACLE-1923 23 CHAPTER III. Now as this band was gathered together and lead on into the midst of this new land by Elvira Ehnbom, they were rejoicing over their rapid prog- ress, when suddenly a great cry went up from the throats of the greedy Class: “Lo! if it doth happen that we are to graduate after many days, it ap- peareth that there is much need of many dollars wherewith to provide the song and dance thereof!” And so, thinking these things, the Class made many a feast, and the public was bidden that money might be brought into the treasury, and the coffers were filled. And behold, it did come to pass, at about this same time, that the Class did aspire to histrionic honors, and did present to the people a great and wonderful play, wherein each should act what he was not; and they did choose as a sacrifice one of the great comedy dramas once so thoughtlessly committed by a great man of recent years, and “Bashful Mr. Bobbs” was once more “butchered to make a Junior holiday.” And lo! again the awful deed was done; and the multitude did cry out in their hearts, “Heaven for- give them, for they know not what they do,” and with their lips. “How grand and wonderful this thing which ye have done!” and the heads of the Class did become swelled to their fullest capacity at the praise they did receive for the murderous deed they had done. Now, when the nineteenth day of the fifth month of the year of Two-and- Twenty was fully come, this Class did give yet a great feast, and did send messages over all the land, east, west, north, and south, to all the Seniors thereof, saying, “Come ye, and make merry with us; for the Class of Two- and-Twenty is to depart to a far country, and all things are now ready for a feast.” And as they were bidden, so come they in a large group to the place set apart, and did eat of the good things of the land, and did rejoice with the Class of Two-and-Twentv at the good fortune which had come to them, in return for all their long and patient laboring at the tasks that had been set before them. And men of high standing in the land did speak unto the people words of wisdom, and of cheer, and of encouragement, and did in many feel- ing words say farewell to the Class that was departing. And when guests did at last depart from the festivities, they were ex- ceedingly glad that things were as they had been proclaimed, and did give much thanks to the Class of Three-and-Twenty for the pleasure they had pro- vided for their enjoying. And behold, as the Class went on its way in great rejoicing through the land of plenty and of promise, they were suddenly astonished to find that two fair damsels who had been wandering along tlie path alone were lost and after a long and careful search without finding them, they proceeded on along the path hoping that some other company would rescue them at once and that they would bo carried on safely through the journey to graduation. And lo, the whole number at the end of this third year was nine-and- twenty. And it came to pass, at the end of these three years, that Lee Russel Carlson, the professor who had thus far traveled in their lead, did go from this country to far distant places, and there was much grief and sorrow in the land. For verily, had he made himself dearly beloved by the Class of Three-and-Twenty.

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22 THE ORACLE —1923 And it came to pass, after some months, that their eyes were turned toward graduation, but many, with one consent, began to make excuse. The first said: “I am poor in health. Therefore T cannot graduate.” Another said : “I must needs toil at home. Therefore I cannot graduate.” A third said: “I am dull and cannot learn. I pray thee have me ex- cused!” So thus did this class decrease in numbers until the whole number at the end of the first year was twenty-nine. CHAPTER IT. Now it came to pass at the beginning of the second year that a new band of youths did come up from the adjoining territory, and the Class of Three- and-Twenty, in the new dignity of their promotion, remembered the days of their own greenness, and as the Sophomores of their day had done unto them, even so did they do unto these new Freshmen, and did show no mercy unto their sufferings, and no heed unto their lamentations, until all were bruised and full of much sorrow. Now it came to pass, soon after they entered the land, that they were one and all seized with a strange infirmity, which did cause them to act with much fierceness and strangeness of manner, and to grapple and wrestle with their fellows in much rage and seeming ferocity. Wise men were called to look upon them, who did examine them with much care and pains, and did finally pronounce the infirmity in the male 1 ‘football” and in the female “basketball,” and did assure the frightened leader, Edith Paddock, that the malady while it needs must be contagious and likewise sometimes fatal, was yet a necessary evil, and one that even the wise men knew not the way to cure. So, with many anxious fears and dire forebodings, did the instructors allow the disease to run its natural course, and lo, none were killed, and few were seriously injured, whereat there was great rejoicing throughout the land. And as the Class did journey through the land, behold, there were two maidens who were fair to look upon, who had strayed far from the companies which they had set forth with, and were much sorrowful. And as the members of the (’lass did look upon them in their loneliness, their hearts were stirred in pity for them, and did open wide unto them that they should be gathered in. Straightway our class made money enough to have a party in the middle of the year. Now it was a rule that everyone in the class should bring some- one to the party. Therefore, we had a good attendance and everyone sajd that they had a good time, but behold we still had some money left in the treasury. And behold someone said: “Why couldn’t the Freshmen and we have a contest and see which could sell nine hundred bars of candy first.” Lo, the Freshmen had sixty in their class to sell their candy and we had only eight-and-twenty to sell ours but we were such good workers that we sold it before the Freshmen were hardly started. Behold! what a slow bunch they were! After the first semester was over the Sophomores had now laid away some money. Therefore the Sophomores and Seniors intended to give a party and entertain the Freshmen and Juniors. But time sped rapidly and the Seniors were too busy. Therefore the party was called off. Now at the close of the second year the whole number that had survived was thirty-one.

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24 THE ORACLE —1923 CHAPTER IV. Now it so happened that there dwelt in an adjoining territory, Charles Barts, a man of much learning and good repute, who hearing of the departure from his post of Lee Russel Carlson, removed from his field of labor, and dwelt for a time in the Land of Learning, that the travels of the Class of Three-and-Twenty might continue for many days. And it came to pass that the Class of Three-and-Twenty found favor in the eyes of this wise and worthy stranger, and success looked fair before them, and they were much glad. Now this, the fourth year in the history of this great and wonderful Class of Three-and-Twenty lias been one of much hard labor, and but little resting by the wayside; for preparations have been making ready for them to take their final departure from the land. Now it came to pass, a. their pride grew to a great bigness within them, that the Class began to wish for badges befiitting their station; and many messages were sent to the big cities and all the towns round-about for samples of their fine jewelry; and at last, after much considering, the Class professed itself to be satisfied with its choice, and rings were purchased with which they rested well content. Then it straightway came to pass that the members of the Class began to work on the Oracle and to write down the greatest and most wonderful of thoughts, such as no one ever had thought before since the beginning of the world, upon sheets and sheets of foolscap, that the people who should come unto them to listen unto words of deep scholarship upon the night of their Commencement should not needs be turned away in disappointment. Likewise did they sew and sew and sew upon yards of fine silk and linen, that the eyes of the multitude should be gladdened by the glitter of their fine raiment, even while their ears should be enlightened by the wisdom of their much speaking. Now there was in this Class a certain few that had a certain likeness, who were descendents of William Aaron, of the House of Weeden, a man of war and of much valor. But behold! they did grow fearful of that heavy course that the other members of the Class of Three-and-Twenty had to carry, and their hearts felt heavy within them as they communed with it from day unto day, till they resolved not to take their departure with the Class of Three-and-Twenty, but to stay yet a twelve-month longer in the Land of Learning, and finish their journey with that company which should come this way in the year to come. For verily, had they studied their arithmetic long and faithfully and had learned by many strange and curious ways how surely two and two make four. And their feet grew heavier and heavier at the bidding of her heart, as they lagged behind in their classes, and would not move ahead unto the gates. So with many tears and much bewailing did the Class of Three-and-Twenty bid them farewell, and sorrowfully pass on their way without her. So it came to pass that of the three and forty that entered this land in nineteen, only four-and-twenty will depart, for verily, verily, 1 say unto you. that broad is the gate, and wide is the way that leadeth to the High School, and many there be that go in thereat; but straight is the gate, and narrow is the way that leadeth to graduation, and few there be that find it. Four years hath the Class of Three-and-Twenty sojourned in the land, and gathered in large portions the fruits from the Tree of Knowledge. But it is written, “In the day when ye shall have eaten of all these fruits, ye shall surely be driven forth from the land!” Now, T say unto you, they must