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Page 29 text:
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PROPHECY OF CLASS OF 1951 Upon finding ourselves scattered about the ground of a strange land, Betty S. and I, Quita U., slowly picked ourselves up after recovering from our 10,000 feet fall form an airplane and decided to discover what this fairyland was all about. After walking in the desolate wilderness for days and days, we finally stumbled upon an old tee-pee bearing the sign, psychiatrist. When we drew back the door of the hut, we were amazed to see Jo Ash, administering aid to Elmer Lauer who had recently been hurt as the result of a head-on collision of a hydroraatic atom corn picker and a jet-propelled combine . Since both of these people were our former classmates, we drank a cup of Dr. Ash's strychhine brew and continued on our mysterious Journey. Then--suddenly—out of space—there came a blinding blue streak which took Betty by surprise and she fell to the ground. The streak, having circled us several times, came to a stop. We then discovered Gene Loercher, the driver of the blinding streak--a stock car. He informed us that he had just copped the feature classic, the 500-lap destruction race, at the Indianapolis Speedway. After chatting with our long-lost classmate for a while we picked up our crutches andcontinued on our way. As we hobbled lazily in the sunlight, we passed a row of small business establishments with various names. But our eyes stopped on one outstanding sign which read, Orville Jackson, Esq. Junior Chemist; Specialist in Emulsified Concentrated Hog Mash. Junior has convinced us that there was no hog mash on earth that would leave your hogs with that regurgitated feeling. He gave us such an interesting sales talk on this fine product that we decided to buy a sack Just for old times' sake. Junior thanked us for the sale as we picked up our mash and walked back out the door into the seemingly enchanted village. As it was nearing 12:00 noon, we decided to eat dinner at Ye Olde Soupe Shoppe on North Perch Street. Just as we sat down, a familiar looking woman walked in. Trailing on to her skirts were four dirty, frecklefaced, red-headed, little demons—three boys and a girl. As she neardd our table, we Immediately recognized her to be the former Fonda Spaits now Mrs. Alfonse Leroy Carter, heir to the Carter Liver Pill millions. After downing a frong-leg sandwich, we bade Mrs. Carter and her four little pills goodbye. Then, upon leaving the Shoppe for a stroll, a right violet-red Seraibearing the names, Bruner and Johnson, Kidney Bean Freight Lines, whizzed by. I guess they must have seen us for they made a U-turn in the loop of this fair city and came back to chat awhile. Wendell told us that he and James were co-partners in the International Kidney Bean Plant overlooking the busy metropolis of Kruger, India. Then, James politely informed us that they were already late with a shipment of beans to the Institution of Feeble-minded where Miss Joan Schmidt is the head specialist in the speech correction department. We were amazed to hear this because Joan was so set on going to ballet school. We said our goodbyes as Wendell took the wheel and drove away. As we turned to walk away, we saw three handsome men walking down the street toward us. We recognized them to be Leonard Cook, Earl Long, and Bob Rawlins--our old friends and former classmates. They, proudly and with much dignity, informed us that they were all junior partners in the Wall Street Insurance Agency, and said that they were on their way to the state house for a conference with the governor. This little conference was to determine what punishment should be given to Bob (Toughie) Ellis for a recent riajor robbery of the No. lWtetll Street Bank in the heart of the city, toughie is a notorious robber who operates along waterfronts and rives a Model T Ford, stripped down to ahot rod, which he uses for his getaway car. We understand Toughie's case, as he was never interested or very intelligent in our school days; Always teasing girls, and stealing small articles from the school. We shook our heads at the fate of our old school-mate and walked away. As we walked along, we kept hearing a high, shrill, beautiful tune , floating above the city from nowhere. Then, by accident, we looked up at a towering buildingto see a lovely maidenwith long black hair singing, Wabaeh
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Page 31 text:
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Cannon Ball accompanied on the mandolin by another lovely woman with glowing red hair 1 Lo and behold It was Mary Jo Briggs and Dorothy Bayles, two brilliant students who had emerged from A. C. H. S We called to them and chatted awhile about this and that and finally learned that Mary Jo and Dorothy have been music partners touringthe country since we graduated— back in »5l. Because it was getting late in the day, we politely but quickly said our farewells and shuffled along. As we wore talking over our adventures for the day about reminiscing with those who had graduated with us, a long, black Cadillac convertible with loud speakers attached, slowly drove by. At first the sound coning from the speakers was muffled and hard to make out, but then—suddenly with all cleamess--we heafd, Charlotte (two-ton Tessie) Mitchell, renouned lady wrestler would clash with Betty (the angel) Speclale tonight in Madison Square Garden with none othM ) | gps(? geJ;eJtUpton officiating, n y®11 this is the morning after the'morning' after the fight. And the Angel is 50,000 richer. Just as soon as we eat breakfast we re going to look for one of those atom-pulled Jet planes and take off for the land we know so well.
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