Alexis High School - Memoirs Yearbook (Alexis, IL)

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A Negro ' s Prayer Oh Lord, give Brother Jones the eye of an eagle, that he may see sin from afar. Glue his ears to the Gospel telephone and connect him with the central skies. Illuminate his brow with a brightness hat will make the fires of hell look like a tallow candle. Nail his hands to the gospel plow and bow his head in some lonesome valley whsre prayer is much wanted to be said, and anoint him all over with the kerosene oil of thy salvation and set him on fire. Too Late Frank Mathers to Photographer — I don ' t like those plates at all. I look like an ape. Photographer — Ycu should have thought of that before you had them taken. Phelix Nelson — Ed, what ' s your favorite wild game? Ed Rohr— Football. Polite Hint Mr. Gates — I say, do you ever play anything by request? Delighted Musician — Yes, certainly. Mr. Gates — Then I wonder if you would play dominoes until i finish my lunch. Mr. Borland — Was your garden a success this year? Mr. Lung — Very much so. My neighbor ' s chickens took first prize at the poultry show. Just Overhea rd Mr. Doyle (coming into office) — Good moning. Miss Treadwell, and what are you going to do? Miss Treadwell — Oh, I ' m going to keep house. Mr. Doyle — Oh! I didn ' t think you would take me up so quick. In Physiology Miss Emery — ' T mma, what are the three parts of the brain? Emma — Cerebrum, cerebellum and maeduUa oblongata. Miss Emery — Now are you all sure that you have them? Dale Wixson in History — Offices are given to men who are vacant. '

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OurA - B-Cs — stands for Alexis, our good little town. P — stands for Bee Hive, we all like to read. — stands for cases, we all do get. . P — stands for Doyle, our intelligent Spaniard. F — stands for Emery, our some classy cook, p ' — stands for Fame, that we read of in books. — stands for Gates, our superior coach. J-J — stands for History, in which many turn pale. — stands for Index, we students use much. J — stands for Joking, we all dislike. — stands for Kicks, which are made now and then. J - — stands for Lung, our some smart Prof. . - — stands for Mac, who we wouldn ' t call short. — stands for Notes, a student ' s great folly. Q — stands for Orations, which are given with ease, p — stands for Parrish, who we all like to see. — stands for Quietness in the students study. J - — stands for Roads, which are sometimes muddy. 2 — stands for Student, of which we have none. P — stands for Treadwell, who sure can sing some. U — stands for the Union, to which all students belonj. — stands for Victory, which we always get. --stands for Work, we all like so much. — stands for Xmas, when we get a vacation. Y — stands for Yelling, we all do so well. 2 — stands for Zeal, which we have nix. What Do You Think About This 111 Information has been received that Mrs. Brown, who was spend- ing a vacation of several weeks in Colorado, was killed in an auto accident over long distance telephone by her husband. Lynn Wixson — My ancestors came over in the Mayflower. Bill Farrell — Yes, but the immigration laws weren ' t so strict then as they are now. Mr. McKelvey — Have you ever done any public speaking? Roy Edgar — I once proposed to a girl over the telephone in my liome town.

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l e, Mistook I waited for her on the porch; The sky was black as ink. The roses red breathed incense round; The tree birds chirped, I think. Soon came she softly to the door And groped to find the light. I did not want the darkness spoiled; I love to love by night. I clasped her in my eager arms — Our lips met one another. She screamed, and pushed the button on. Ye Gods! It was her mother. Phelix — Well, Doc, did you get the dime cut of the boy that acc-ideiit- ally swallowed it? Doc — Yes, and two and a half out of the father of the boy. How do you like it here? asked the Cape Colony girl to the new girl next door. I like it. We got crematsd cellars, cemetry plumbing, elastic lights and a hoosit. What ' s a hoosit? Oh a bell rings. You put a thing to your ear and say ' Hello ' and then some one says ' Hello ' and you say ' Hoosit ' . Mr. Farrell (With Newspaper) — Do ycu know William, that every time you draw your breath some one dies. Bill — Wel l I ' m sorry; but I can ' t help it and if I quit drawing my breath I ' d die too. How is it, demanded Mr. Lung, that I scarcely ever find you fel- lows at work when I come in? Well sir, replied Mike, It ' s on account of those rubber heels you wear. Miss Parrish— And then the knight ' s heart was filled with joy, for he saw by the wayside a beautiful damsel. Now you all know what a damsel is don ' t you? Ralph Johnson — Yes, teacher. — a small plum. Sorry