Agnes Irwin School - Last Strand Yearbook (Rosemont, PA)

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JAYNEZ Don't be foolish. TYsoN: I to catj Darling, precious snooky, did he love his mother? fPoking him at Jaynej Kiss your da-da. JAYNE: Frances, do behave properly. TYsoN: Very well. But really you can't do those things, all at once. JAYNE: fpleadingj But I want to. TYSON: There are many things I want too, but I can't have them. JAYNE: Well then if you must have your own way. TYsoN: freeing Bean amd M eirs j Why hello there! Where did you come from? BEAN: Hello Frances and Kate, how are you? JAYNE: Fine, come sit with us. I Clock strikesj TYwN: Goodness gracious, it's time for Angel's teal Garcory Du cream! I Enter Martin. She takes cat to corner and pro- ceeds to give it its suppenj JAYNE: Whom do you think we met? TYSO-NZ I cutting inj Edith Gillingham and Hope Mc- Michael! They were having a fine fight over a bone of one of Nap0leon's dogs. It was very funny. You know they are writing a book about the great hero. MEIRS: fsarcasticallyj Great jellyfish! TYSON : Hope does the illustrating. They are on the forty- third volume. You should have seen them. Their heads were masses of green veils and goggles, to pre- vent sunburn, and they had a big van of notes following. JAYNE: Oh I must tell you! Emma Dorr has learned to draw the most wonderful caricatures. She has a regular job on a paper to make funnies. I often help her. She's on the highroad to becoming an artist, MARTIN: fwith catj Well, if you speak of artists, I can beat any of your tales. Maria de Kosenko has been struggling along in the Latin Quarter for years. MEIRS.: fsarcastically to Tysonj Living on roaches, I suppose. TYsoN: fsentimentallyj Oh to have art! Anything for art! MARTIN: She has at last had one of her pictures admitted to the Salon. It is most beautiful, a dirty piece of glass with some soap smeared on the corner, and she calls it Clean-up Week. It is inspiring!

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I make the children learn those by heart. And the next week she tells how to be beautifulfiip until aftern the a e of nineteen. It's most interestin . g 8' MEIRS: Did you hear about Hansell Earle? She has been suing Leokowards Zacharewcz, the Polish actress, for daring to call herself the most beautiful woman on earth. I read all about it in the paper. Hansell always was a beauty. I hope she wins her suit. I Enter Frances Tyson with a cat in her arms and Kate Jayne in a brown gollatea costume of the Eliza- bethan period. They are arguing so violently that they seat themselves at a table without seeing Bean and M eirs, who listen attentively to the discussionj TYsoN: But Kate, do listen to reason. JAYNE: Reason? I never listen to reason! 'I'YsoN: I brushing catj You can't build that new theater at Manayunk, and an amphitheatre at Brown's-Mills-in- the-Pines, and start a new circus company all at once without mining yourself, your health, Anne Meirs, and me. JAYNE! fpeevishlyj Frances, please let me be. Am I not the most successful theatrical manager in the world? You might think from the way you talk to me, that I have no more common sense than a baby. TYsoN: fdrylyj At times, I believe you haven't. k vw- -1- , , JAYNE! Very well, if you're going to say nasty things I won't talk to you. I Martin brings in tea. Tyson and lane drink, each reading a paper in stony silence.j Mamas: fta Beanj They're at it again. Kate has another wonderful idea, but just watch her come down to earth. I had a talk with her on this very subject last night, and she thinks it's all practicable. BEAN! How does it happen you two are in it? MEIRS: We own a share in her business, and ever since she went in for theatrical work she has come around to our store for advice. BEAN: Your store? Mains: Yes, Tyson and I keep a store for fresh fruit, vegetables, and flowers, which we grow ourselves. She has horses and cats, and I have dogs and cockroaches for sale. It's great fun. Come see it some day. JAYNE : Frances. TvsoN: Yes. JAYNE: Don't let's fight. TYsoN: We're not Fighting. It's merely a debate. Ques- tion, can Kate Jayne do or not do what she wants? fHolding up cat.j Angel here shall decide.

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Marks: fwho thinks she can drawj Tush! BEAN! ftactfully changing subjectj Did you know that Huberta Potter is giving dancing lessons? She is so very graceful and attractive that everyone goes to her. Katharine Ogden assists. They have the most perfect dancing parlors, done in magenta and crimson. I took a lesson in the latest dance today, and am wild about it. Marks: K to Tyson who has just picked up the last enormous chocolate cake on the tablej Frances, do give me a little bite. I Tyson holds it out, and M eirs swallows the whole at one gulp. Tyson gazes blankly at her empty fingers.j JAYNE: I just received a letter from Anna Binney Brinton, who is down in the Kentucky Mountains, teaching school with Miss de Long. Her only pay is that they call her Binney, and she is so pleased that she swears she will never leave them. ' MARTIN! Who's Miss de Long? JAYNE: The lady who lectured to us once at school. MARTIN: Oh yes! just as they say Frances Randall does to all who come near her. Her everlasting theme is Conscience She keeps a school for it, and in the summer indulges in Mr. King's favorite pastime of hunting it up in the dictionary to write about in spare moments. fTumult, band music, and other disorders float through window. Mad rush to look out.j TvsoN: I grabbing catj There goes a parade. Let's follow. fEa-it Jayne, Bean, Tyson, and Meirs through window. Martin goes to sleep in corner. Enter Bailyj BAILY: Thank goodness they're gone. I thought those gossiping old hens would never leave in time for me to get ready for that meeting. Get busy, Helene. Where is Mary Laird? Call them all in. fE.rit Martin. Baily steps on cat s saucer and uses appropriate language. Enter Martin, housemaid, Marry Laird, meeklyj and cook, Sarah Morton, defiantlyj BAILY: Mary, dust the room carefully, and be sure to brush all the dirt under the sofas. Sarah, water the milk, as there's a big crowd comin', and put plenty of strong sauce in that crab left over from last week. Onion's a good thing. MoRToN: Sure, don't you think I know my business? I've learned your tricks by now. fExit Morton.j BAILY: Helene, wash those salad plates we used a while back. You'll need them tonight. Be sure to clean them well, as our guests are mighty particular. Mary, go get the bell boy to clean my shoes.