Winter Park High School - Towayam Yearbook (Winter Park, FL)

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frmmnwsm A s Further exploration of the island revealed still more startling discoveries, which can best be told by a newspaper we found and read. On the front page were the headlines, PAT MEY In Bad Shape, But Can Be Fixed by Plastic Surgery Claims JOE MAT- TOCKS , spokesman for the great plastic surgeon, DOT HILL, whose slogan is A stitch in time saves --some of my patients! More headlines read, Lonely Hearts Club Elects Officers. They were JANICE ELDREDGE president, BABS HEARD I. C. P. M. tin charge of prospective malesy and BEVERLEY BOWER C. M. T. M. tchief mode of transportation of malesy Looking over in the gossip section, we were shocked to read columnist BILL CALDWELL'S open letter to BABS CRISLER, Twenty-first Century's answer to Mae West, who just married her forty- ninth husband, VERNON CHAMBERS. His famous last words were, IlYes I know, but this is differente she love; me. We also learned from his column that LYNNE BAILEY, local girl who made good, was doing well in a play entitled Rip, Was That My Slip or HI Vant to Be Alone. Co-starring with her was BILL WRIGHT, great lover of stage and screen. He also loves radio. Between acts, the audience was entertained by the comic couple SCOTTY SULLI- VAN and ANNIE MAE STINSON, doing the female impression of Mutt and Jeff. GAY AYERS also made the news when she and BETTY RUSSELL had an argument over who would get DICK WHITE, young street cleaner Who became disgustingly rich after making a clean up. Turning to the sports section, we saw a picture of two well-known hot-rod celebrities CLIFF twho put the Benzedrine in my limousiney WRIGHT and DENNIS tFlash Abouty STEDMAN, captioned with Jet Races Tonight. Also on the sports page was a picture of the fearless pugilist, JAMES DO- RAN, knocking down his tenth straight opponent to cop the Old Ladies Home boxing championship. After the fight was over he commented to his 0p- ponent, It was a great fighteMom-e Under this picture we saw the headlines I'ROBERTA PERRY, Nine Times Contender for the Womanls Weight Lifting Championship, Lifts Again. She is to be managed by those two great managers of renown, CAROLYN SIMONDS and ORPHA VAIL. Enough information extracted from the newspaper, we put it down and continued our wandering. En- tering the business section, we passed by a smoke shop and instead of a wooden Indian we saw an Eskimo. Closer investigation revealed this Eskimo to be none other than TED WEILER, who welcomed us with the delightful greeting 0f, IIUGH! Further conversation with TED informed us that the propri- etor of the store VIRGINIA RUSS and her assistant PEGGY REDMON, smokers of the world's finest cigars, had placed him there to further their trade. Over this store was a sign which read, The Utopia Wildcats, ta team made up entirely of rO'SteensQ play tonight . Further information stated that head Coach and Proud Father, PAUL OISTEEN was confident of victory. We were interrupted from reading the rest of this sign when we heard a loud clash of cymbols and a beating of drums. Looking up the street we saw what seemed to be a large parade made up entirely of women, and apparently in honor of MILTON SAWLEY, for on one large banner were the words, We Want Milton . As it drew Closer I read the bottom words, uDead or Alive. Realizing that this innocent boy must be in trouble, I hastened over to the leaders of the mob, EDDIE ADAMS, MARILYN RITTER and ELAYNE LOTT, to learn what news I could extract. It seems that MILTON had promised to marry each one of these women, but while Visiting a circus he became infatuated with ENICE CARDER, the snake dancer, and when last seen, they were slithering off to Justice of the Peace, LEROY BEASLEY. BOBBY BOYD, fearing mob Violence, offered himself to the women as the solution, but was quickly arrested on charges of bigamy by JOAN RICHARDS and VIOLA MAR- CHAND, two Utopian flatfoots, who dragged him off to the cooler. The mob soon broke up and I was left alone on the streets of this strange island, a little disturbed by what I had seen throughout the day, but very happy that I had made the trip to learn the fate of the Class of 50. - s :' 9V51$55 f? e'w'aw MM

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f z: i; ? m RN i iiiluiqq f, wing; 14!? ni' l: Willi? LJQr'CtLL ' Vi'ht'ufas! nhV LLJQM Lamas .. With a swirl of mist and a cloud of smoke our rocket ship soared from its mooring and headed for the promised landga land, we were told, that sur- assed and outdid the beauty of Mother Nature her- self-a true paradise! A living Utopia 1n the year Of 2000. Because the trip would take a few hours to corn- plete, I set myself down alongside the pilot to see if he might render some information about thls won: drous land we were to visit. llWell now I tell ya itis this-a-way . . Realizing that this voice could be none other than FRED tSPEEDYy LEMOSY, I took an instant interest in what he had to say. llBack in the year of 1950, FRED began, things werenlt going so well in the world of ClVlll- zation. So, thinking they could better themselves by leaving their present positions, the class of 1950 founded a Utopia. Among the first class members to arrive was BETTY BATE, who was the stellar attraction at the Silver Star until she had bubble trouble and was forced to leave with her co-partners, SHARON JOHNSON and DIANE SCHLEY. Next to arrive was none other than THOMAS MOORE HENKEL, the famous author who had just written a book enti- tled SHE WORE A YELLOW RIBBON or BABY, IT,S COLD OUTSIDE. Following this disturbance came DAVID tTHE NOSEy DONNELLY and BOB tEAGLE BEAKy WHITE who we're caught dueling over who would take the place of Jimmy gurante, who retired after seeing what they had to 0 er. PETE NEIDE, daring young modeler of Menis night gowns arrived in Utopia after being banished from the country for indecent exposure, by DORO- THY WHITMORE, newly elected President of the Woman's Morality Club, their motto being We want more Nighties on Neide. The real reason for the prominence of the club, however, is due to the eminence of its two sponsors PETER ODELL and RlAbY LAVENDER who set all examples for the c u . Once this Utopia was firmly established FRED continued, llmembers started pouring in froin all parts of the country. Among this new onrush x t. thhgxxeV Q. . CLASS PROPHECY was the deadly and dreaded l'BANKS' BOOBS gang which for some time had been terrorizina Eatonville and Vicinity. These hoodlums, consistin 0f JERRY BANKS, tTHE BRAINSL CHARgms WELLMAN, tDRIVER AND HENCHMANy RONALD MASTEN, tTHE CREEPy and DAVIF: SIMS ifUNDERCOVERMANy, were persuaded to leave the country when their acting shyster laWyer JERRY KIBBE, lost the court battle being Wageci by the Famous Prosecutor BILL HENRY. At this point FRED,S voice was cut off by a shrill whistle which spierced the very core of our 0 cockpit. Pulling alongside and looking very sinister was the notorious rocket c0p, MARCIA WALTERS with her left-hancl man and real reason for her suc: cess, MARY LOU WILLIAMSON. They motioned to us that we were approaching Utopia and that We had better slow down. Following their instructions FRED reduced his speed and soon we were over the island, which was to reveal some very interesting surprlses. As soon as we landed, we were greeted by a gala welcoming party consisting of that great orchestra of renown, made up of four former band students, JACK LANG, JOAN SEELEY, JAMES MOORE, and JOHN NEAL, who played two jazzed-up fun- eral marches and a chorus of Save Your Confeder- ate Money, Boys, The South Is Going To Rise Again. After this first disturbance quieted down, another one was started by DOROTHY SPRING- STEEN, present mayor of Utopia, who delivered a long soliloquy on the beauty of the surrounding environment which began with Welcome to this here dump. The greeting was soon over with, however, and we moved about freely to have a better look around. The first thing to catch our eye was a big neon sign advertising the championship bout between the women wrestlers, JEANETTE OWASH EMi OUT WRING EMi OUTT O'STEEN and MAGGIE tTHE MUGT ATHERTON, which will be held at the Old Men,s Home where Messers. Jones, Miller and Baker are the chief residents. ANNETTE CRO- LEY, janitor of the home for the past thirty yeaIS, gave up her position to JOAN BLEDSOE, number one on the waiting list.

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