William Howard Taft High School - Senior Yearbook (Bronx, NY)

Page 8 text:

'F f N-J -S 5+-rs, M. . . .1 X L. I ' V .1 pf! . if T3 ' ' 1 i I? '- .' . A fr- gf f ,-'Z ,Jilin ' '- ssiiiiii. . I 7' Huw- ' J . X-., W .ag 5 4.4 .? In the beginning, when nomadic tribes wandered over the face of the Bronx, sojourning one season at Evander Valley, another at Clinton Plains, forever seeking a final resting place for their weary bones, the Great Spirit, sorrowful over their plight, decided to grant them their fervent wish. Lo and behold! Where once there were vast, swampy tracts of barren land, there now appeared vast, dusty tracts of land adorned with a new camp. Great feasts were held, and in the midst of their rejoicing, they christened their new abode in honor of a great former chieftain. And soon afterward the inhabitants paraded throughout the wastelands proclaiming the new tribal name: TAETITES! But all was not peaceful. Teachers, foraging for educational material in the halls, disappeared for days at a time. Searches were organized and many of these older members were found wandering dazedly through the empty cor- ridors, in search of the rooms they had left so many days earlier. But never daunted, the patriarchs solved this problem by appointing a committee to survey the building and draw rough plans of its layout. lt was at about this time that the attention of the elders was drawn to the activities of the students. Every day, in the large hall of study and the room for eating, there was a great battle for seats. lt was especially noisy in the eating room as there were more loose articles for the young combatants to toss at each other. At first the rulers smiled at this show of youthful exuberance, but as the casualties mounted and the tribe showed definite signs of thinning out, they made laws and decrees against the popular sport. Of course this caused much comment among the younger generation, and the more athletic refused to sub- mit to what they thought was an unjust rule. This group continued their noon- time practice despite the opposition they encountered. Une measure taken against these rebels was the institution of a publication called the Taft Review which issued an edict against uncouth behavior at mealtime. This was carved on a stone and placed at the door of the main exit, where it not only served as a warning but doubled as a doorstop. However, despite all these disturbances, the majority of Taftites lived happily and peacefully. Except for one thing. At various intervals, huge monsters stalked the halls and took their toll of stu- dents. These predatory beasts were called the Dynosaur Regents Rex . The battle of resistance begun then, although modified, has never ceased. Time passed and the tribe became a well organized unit. A new group of youngsters, the class of forty six, were initiated into the clan and with them came unique and novel ideas. The Taftites embarked upon an age of simplicity. Education grew in leaps and bounds, and a new cultural height was reached. The large hall on the first floor became a great social center to which the tribes- men flocked to discuss the great questions of the day. lt was here that the philosophers of Taft leisurely reclined in their togas and discussed recent best sellers such as the one by the rising dictator, Adolphus Caesar. which began: High School as a whole is divided into four sections, hrst of which the Eresh- men inhabit, second the Sophomores, third the juniors, and last the Seniors.

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Sv- Q,o S 4 42' 4' ' v an , Y Y 3' ' '4 ' ll :Q el ., . 5. , Q 0 4 4 - '. 'Q f A A , 3 -3 I0 ' f 'Q I' ,i . 4 'Q db r f 'QQ' Q, q ali if .1 Q 5 , . Cr an lf s' I 4 1. 'se' .5 F . 'Z sn -' 4 A 'g 4l : ' ' I 'I 5 ' 9' Yiv Q ' , gi lv 1 ' Zh' CD ll ll ll AV .V rl 0 'Q 'of , lr, ll 1,11 4. O 101. 1' lhvyb N a bright summer's day in the year 2000, a young boy, leisurely flying in his heliocopter over an overgrown swamp, was suddenly startled when his radar dial began to spin wildly indicating the presence of metal in the ground. With the curiosity of the young, he descended and proceeded to investigate. He came upon a metallic cylinder partially imbedded in the groundg but before he opened the tube, pangs of hunger assailed him so he swallowed his condensed lunch tablets and took some vitamins for a chaser. I-le then examined the tube and found that it contained some ancient documents concerning a long un- heard of educational institution called Taft. The name struck a responsive chord in his memory-why that was the school that sank into the swamp until neither brick nor girder was left. I-le read on and found that the documents contained a history of the first five years of Taft. It began . . .

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All these people differ from one another in language, customs, and laws. Of them all, the Freshmen are the bravest because they are the furthest removed from the civilization and requirements of the departments, and because they are seldom vi.ited by things that have a tendency to weaken their fighting spiritf' There arose great literature in which the learned men told of their deities. The gods of English and Physical Education ruled the heavens while the many headed dog Math, guarded the entrance to the dark regions, and Science, son of Charon, ferried the doomed across the river Styx to the caves of judgment. Perhaps the most important events in the lives of the Taft youth were the contests of physical prowess. Taftis discus team was known in all the far corners of the earth for their great skill, and bards sang of their valiant deeds on the court. The beautiful girls of the tribe crowned the winning athletes with laurel wreaths as signs of their love. During this time art developed greatly also. Sculpture was one of the greatest forms and the majority of Taft students were master chiselers. The Taftites had a simple and beautiful court in the center of their building in which they spent much time worshipping nature and writing of the wonders of the world. Here, placed in small tubs of rich earth, were handsome shrubs around the cloistered walks where the young intellectuals found peace and quiet. In the spring, their toga'd forms reclined on marble benches while slaves hastened back and forth with pops and Dixie cups, and in one corner an old crone vended her pretzels. The Taft Preview also made great strides of progress. From a small cube of rock, rudely inscribed, it developed into a four-page, hand-printed circular. ln it was printed all the news concerning sports, government, sculpture, litera- ture and the theater. And of course, the Taft Review never forgot its prime purpose. ln every other issue they printed a beautifully decorated editorial warning the populace of the evils of noise and dirt in the large lunch room. And so the Taft tribe made progress. They no longer feared the elements and had made considerable advances in the elimination of natural hazards. But as time passed, the citizens of Taft became more and more self- satisfied and complacent. Surrounded by luxury they were loath to exert them- selves and spent most of their time reclining either in the main hall, or the lunch room. Classes became smaller and smaller and education began to ebb. Bad influences from the hostile outside world seeped in, and the Taftites, used to soft living, were unable to fight them. VVithin a short time the gates of Taft fell, and the greatest civilization the world had ever known was almost com- pletely wiped from the face of the earth. The Facultyn, a group of deities the class of forty six had once worship- ped, suddenly rose to become the greatest power in the land. They ruled with an iron hand, and soon the Taftites were in their power. Every week f'The Faculty levied a tax called the Examl'. The students crammed in order to pav it, but in many cases could not meet its requirements. ln some quarters, where Bvil.. i. 4 :- ,u. i x .ann k 'Tlx sl, is ' nl' t'IN lllli if ll l' A :lr 1 I'I1l 1 I M I T 'X l T' ttf , 'FQ - . ,Q 1 1 vf '-x if 'ICI' . 5 X Q 'ri ' - , X lh ost X I