Weymouth High School - Campus / Reflector Yearbook (Weymouth, MA)

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MARCH REFLECTOR 1 1 Danny Spirit was, if you asked him, ex- tremely annoyed. 10 A. M. and the bell wak- ing him already; enough to give a man the pit, the absolute pit. Dragging on his purple dressing gown, he received this from his man, Pjones : ' ' Danny, old thing, the guv ' nor has landed the Presidency of Wales. We ' re shipping over on the Mauretania for the good old thing. Buzz along, we need you. ' ' Nancy, Wynnie, and Jymmie. Painfully Danny concentrated ; old Cun- ningham-Cunningham had cinched the Presi- dency ; Lady Nancy, Jymmie, and Lord Edwynne Cunningham-Cunningham were go- ing to their father ' s inaugu — ah! he had it! They wished him to go back to England with them. Wouldn ' t he just! At the very moment that Danny was tripping up the gang-plank, Nancy was sitting on the deck waiting for her brothers. Wynnie and Jymmie were in the saloon, figuring out their exact social status, now that their guv ' nor was President of Wales and their mother, honorary President of the Goldfish Protection Association. How- ever, Danny joined none of them, but dashed directly to his cabin. After the Mauretania had weighed anchor, the others followed his example. Not until two days later did Danny emerge, and then only to sink weakly into a secluded steamer chair. Danny ' s eyes sud- denly bulged ; his ears ceased drooping. There was that blighter, Comus, who had nipped him for a thousand pounds in New York ! And he was talking to Nancy — no less. Yes, Lady Cunningham-Cunningham, I shall aid you while your brothers are — er, — indisposed. You are doubtless cognizant of the fact that I am in a position to — er — let you in on the ground-floor, so to speak, of — er — a certain plan. Here Comus paused, not for breath but for effect. To pass the time he polished his spectacles. This act was char- acteristic of Comus ; he was always polishing something that it migh better lend itself to his own immediate end. Really, cooed Nancy, I couldn ' t think of returning without asking my brothers and they ' d hardly appreciate the opportunity just now. Lady Nancy, Comus ' Combs for Combing Comely Coiffures are worthy of your invest- ment. But— No ' buts ' , my dear. In the city of London alone there are 9553 girls with bobbed hair. Right there you have 9553 prospective cus- tomers for Comus ' Combs for Combing Come- ly Coiffures, and on these sale you would net a profit of 10,000 pounds a week on your small investment of 5,000 pounds; which if placed on Comus ' Combs for Combing Comely Coiffures would — Danny waited to hear no more. He shim- mered off to find Wynnie and Jymmie. He found them pale, but living. What ho! That blighter, Cosmus — Nancy — I mean to say, what ? ' ' blurted poor Danny. Elucidate, commanded Wynnie. Cosmus nicked me for all my ready, in New York and now he ' s fishing for Nancy ' s nickels. He ' s off his onion on some plan. Nancy mustn ' t fall — yes ? no ? ' ' Quite right. ' ' chimed Jymmie. Cluster around, old bean, while we do the elder brother act, said Wynnie, and the three pals tottered out on deck. Sign right here, Lady Nancy, Comus was saying. Danny dashed the contract from his hand and tost it upon the waters, while Comus, not wishing to renew his acquaintance with Danny, executed a skillful fadeout. What — ho — I mean to say, what, Deuced- ly lucky, I mean — well lucky, what? Danny was becoming loquacious. Nancy, however, did not seem satisfied with this lucid explanation. So it was Jymmie who pointed out the fallacy of Comus ' Combs for Combing Comely Coiffures. Following this event the strained relations which had existed between Nancy and Danny were relieved, so quite a jolly party disem- barked from the Mauretania and took the train for Wales. There the Cunningham-Cun- ninghams were surprised to find that Danny and Nancy were engaged. Yes, said Nancy to her Mother, we are engaged. It was like this: Danny said, ' Cheerio. ' ' Oh, yes, Danny, ' I told him, and he chirped, Too-dle-oo ! M. De Boer ' 30.

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ia WEYMOUTH HIGH SCHOOL most of the vitamines. Owing to the discovery of the Oleo content in ordinary electrical waves, one of our foremost scientists discov- ered this means for furnishing Vitamines Y and Z which we had been sadly lacking. ' ' Just then a bell rang and my host pressed a button on the side of his desk, whereupon a section of the outside wall slowly descended, on an angle, until it reached out horizontally into space. It was then butted against one of the queerest craft I have ever seen. This vehicle measured about ten feet long, and five high. It had short blunt wings, the entire wing spread of which could not have been more than six feet. ( I learned later that these were used only as an automatic gyroscope apparatus.) My guide, Azo 12, led the way over the sec- tion of wall, which served as gangplank, to the plane. The doors shut and the plane started, yet I could not see any pilot. Axo 12 seemed to know what I was thinking and said : ' ' Our planes are driven by forcing an energy wave through an electric field thus separating the units of an atom; when the various satelites of the nebula of the atom are thus separated an enormous amount of power is created. We store his power in great tanks and it is used as it is needed. ' ' The ships are controlled by radio energy waves so that no pilot is needed with the plane. We will soon arrive in one of the traffic routes. Each line has a certain speed which is automatically attained by each of the planes traveling on it. Thus every plane goes at the same rate of speed and accidents are elim- inated. ' ' We soon reached one of these lines of traffic. On every side of us myriads of planes of all sizes and shapes scuttled along. All of them maintained the same distance from each other and from us. Presently Axo 12 asked me if I felt hungry. When I replied in the affirmative he turned to a small control board on the wall of the plane. He pressed a button and said, Inter- national Lunch. A few seconds later we glided along side of a peculiar framework at- tached to the side of one of the immense build- ings. A section of the wall fell forming a gangplank and a waiter walked over it to us. He held a tray which he unpacked onto a table. Then he returned and the doors shut. Azo 12 said, ' ' In this era if we want to have our lunch in the country or at the seashore it is very simple. Where would you like to eat your meal? I replied, ' ' I think that I would like to get away from this awful turmoil for a while — the countrv will be all right with me. He pressed the button and said, ' ' Fairfax. ' ' Instantly we gathered momentum and pres- ently we were traveling at an enormous rate of speed, although the only way I could tell was because the skyscrapers seemed blended into one. Then we slackened speed until we were lazily drifting along. We were directly over a beautiful lake surrounded by virgin forest. As we made our repast, I became curious about the food, for it was of a strange char- acter and highly concentrated, yet it required a thorough mastication. At that moment Azo 12 said : It is a compound of animal product, vegetable matter and a fibre extract. Different flavors and varieties are produced by the u-e of various synthetic properties and different types of fibre extract. We found long ago that our entire health was determined by the condition of our teeth ; for that reason we produced a food that would automatically prevent tooth decay. And thus did my mirage end ; nothing but my musing remains. What is the real history of man? No one knows, but I shall devote my entire life to the solving of the problem. Already several evidences of this civilization that may have existed before the Pleistocene age have been discovered. Will our civilization ever result in such a world as my dream portrayed, by the further- ance of the merger idea ? Time alone can tell. Arthur L. Garland ' 30.

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12 WEYMOUTH HIGH SCHOOL Julius Caesar TRAGEDY Two Acts Act I Place : Rome. Time: Supper Hour. Caesar: (Entering lunch room) Thank heavens it ' s time to eat. That was a pretty fierce scrimmage over in Gaul this A. M. If the 26th Division hadn ' t come up with those machine guns, I should have missed the 4:15 from Paris. (Sees Cicero) Hi, Cic, how ' s things percolating? Cicero : Ubinam gentium sumus (meaning pretty punk). By the way, how ' s that fight in Gaul coming out ? Cae : Fine. I beat Aristovistus so bad in craps the other day that he had to go home in a barrel. Waiter : Ham and eggs waiting ! ( Caesar gets order and sits down beside Cicero). Cic : The weather man predicts that the Ides of March will be stormy. That means danger for you, old dear. The state can ' t spare your services. Cae: Di immortales! (Equivalent to Hot Dog!) — but that weather man ' s no good. He ' s absolutely cuckoo. When he sends out storm warnings, we ' re sure to have a week of dead calm, and when he says there will be fair weather, it rains flivvers. Cic : Better take it easy, old man, there may be something in it. Cae: (Rising) Thanks, I will. (Pays check and goes. ) Cashier: (Yellmg) Hey! this is a lead quarter ! Cae: (Running) I know it, it ' s the one you gave me last week ! Act II Time: The Next Afternoon. Place: Caesar ' s Kitchenette Apartment. Cornelia : Jul, the landlord says if we don ' t come across soon, we will have to be moving. Cae : The Ides of March ! So that ' s what the weather man meant. Cor: No, Jul. This happens every month. The Ides ef March comes only once a year. This the Ides and I ' d rather not go to see the Sheik tonight; it migh prove dan- gerous. Cae: We must see it. Owing to a pressing engagement in Athens, the film is only showing one night. Are you coming? Cor: Yes, I suppose so. Brutus and Cassius are going to meet us at the show. Cae: Fine! I ' ll sit right next to my dear friend Brutus. Don ' t invite Cash to dinner, he eats too much, (both exeunt). (Later, Brutus, Cassius, Caesar, and Cor- nelia pass down the theatre aisle.) Bru: Where ' 11 we sit? Cae : Oh, down front. They have wonderful looking girls in the vaudeville here, real Charleston and Black Bottom steppers, im- ported from Alabama. (Sits down next to Brutus) Caes (Sitting on a very sharp tack) Yeow! ! ! (Rules sore territory) Oh, you brute! ! ! (Et tu, Brute !) Finis Muriel Golby ' 30. The Autobiography of a Hockey Puck It was Christmas day, and I was presen ' d to my owner, Tom Brown. Gee! When he got me he was so happy, and he exclaimed, Now won ' t I have some fun with this puck, (meaning me) on the ice! Well, seems to me as though it was the day after Christmas when I first got these scars. I was brought down to the frozen river, by Tom and his pals, and there I was thrown on the ice, and before I could holler Jack Robinson, I received such a blow on the side of my face, as would have felled an ox. Well, after that, things flew hot and heavy and I felt sore all over, but pretty soon I was left to lie in the middle of a patch of extra smooth ice. It was at this time that Tom called something like this: Hey! Gang ! What do you say, let ' s pick up a game. Jim, dash over to the dump and get four tins, for the goals, and Mac and I will choose up sides. Well, that met with the approval of the gang, and pretty soon there were two tin cans on each side of the smooth ice, and there was I, in the middle.