West Virginia Wesleyan College - Murmurmontis Yearbook (Buckhannon, WV)

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Diversions Speaking of running around and flitting about, think of all of the things that you should have been doing over the past semesters, that you never quite completed. Humans have a tendency to recreate as often as possible. Just the other day, Tumstyle almost got squashed by some people running around throwing a pigskin back and forth across a grassy field with white lines on it. Some fun, huh? For the few humans who have never stepped out of their rooms I had better tell you about the wonderful opportunities which you may have overlooked. During the day, aside from what you are supposed to be doing — such as attending classes, there are all kinds of athletic possibilities. The gymnasium has all sorts of things to do; racquetball, basketball, soccer, volleyball, squash (not Tumstyle, please), weight lifting, and just about any other activity that the human mind could dream up. 4 Diversions

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My credentials? 1 would have to say that my age is my best credential. I am 94 years old, so I have been around. 1 have lived here all of my life and i have seen what really goes on around here. What I have not seen, Turnstyle has. Turnstyle? . . . Oh! he is my pet gremlin. You may have met him at one time or another and never realized it. Did you ever break your key off in your lock? Well, that was probably Turnstyle, he likes to take naps in the key holes. It is a combination of bad habits, he likes to nap in key holes, but even worse is that WVWC metal is his favorite snack. It is not that the college makes keys that break easily, it is that they taste great. Turnstyle also has a favorite prank. Did you ever look up at the chapel clock and wonder what time it really was? Turnstyle likes to play games in the tower, sometimes he jumps around on the hands of the clock. Remember being late for class? It was all thanks to that gremlin. Where was I? Oh, my age. Even though I seem very old to you, I am not. You see, we hobbits live longer than humans, consequently, my mind is still very good. I live in a humble hobbit abode in- side a big hollow tree on Agnes Howard ' s front lawn. You may have seen me once or twice in the wee hours of the morning feeding the field mice, or helping one of those poor rats escape from fourth floor of Christopher. Other than that, I just try to keep Turnstyle out of trouble, and keep an eye on what ' s happening on campus. Diversions 3

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« Perhaps you are not into these things, or maybe you just do not enjoy the sweat scene? Well, right next door to the gym is the SCOW. Out of ail of the buildings on campus, humans consistently choose to enter this one. Let ' s face it, the building has it all. One of the highlights is the post office, home of the often dreaded mailbox which blows dust and air into your face every time you open it, except when you get an occasional check from mom. Other attractions are watching music videos, shooting pool, killing a few aliens, or catching a bite to eat in the coffee shop. By the way, so far I have been lucky, you humans have not invented a game to kill hob- bits yet, everything but hobbits. After a long day of classes and wandering around in search of nifty things to do, you probably retire to your room to study for a few hours, right? Now when that is all over, you peak over your Intro to Humanities book and realize that it is night time — time to explore the night life of the campus and Buckhanno n. I hope that you do not get too rowdy, I am tired of cleaning bottles out of my front hall every morning. There are plenty of great things to do around here at night. With good movies, plays, bowling and the rest, there is always something to do. You could check out the sports events, sit in on a good lecture or head down to your favorite night spot. 1 have noticed that one of the most popular past times involves humans sitting around their rooms and talking or telling tales with their friends. Well, 1 am exhausted from telling you all about your campus, so 1 think I ' ll go back to my abode, sip on some brandy, and retire. Tomorrow is another day.