Warsaw High School - Blast Yearbook (Warsaw, NY)

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Page Thirty T H E B L A S T June, 1924 old Shylock, the miser, look like a Ford parked beside a Rolls-Royce. Question-why the economy, anyway? Ancient men and philosophers have all devoted their best efforts to solving this problem, but as yet, have arrived at no so- lution. The chances are that they will not arrive at any solution, either. Their last hope is the Oracle of Del- phi, and if that fails, then the problem will go down through the ages as one of the unsolved questions of mankind. Miss Hanchette alone knows the answer-and her lips are like unto those of a graven image. Another thing-she keeps us in a constant state of suspense about her engagement. Sometimes she is wear- ing a diamond, and then again, it is conspicuous by its absence. At various times we wonder if she really is en- gaged. Probably she is, and merely grabs off the ring every time she has a tiff with her man. She's temperamental like that. To Miss Ruth Luckey, our beloved History teacher- words cannot do her justice! She hails from the village of Houghton, N. Y. It's so dead there that the inhabit- ants think that all the opera stars of New York city live in the Singer Building. ' Oh, we forgot-there's a college at Houghton, the one redeeming feature, Say, folks, did you hear the Hough- ton Harmonizers at the church the other night? Were- n't they the berries, though? Miss Luckey was as proud as a peacock because they came from the college of which her pater is president. We have it from good authority that she flirted with one of the good-looking young chaps, but of course, we can't vouch for that re- port. We do not think that her school-marm dignity would hinder from doing it, however, if she felt so in- clined. We would suggest that Miss Luckey take a course in English at some good school before she returns to her duties in the fall . During the two years that she has imparted knowledge to us dumb mortals, she has always emphasized the necessity of using correct Englishg in fact, she said that the incorrect use of the mother tongue grated on her nerves. Oh, man! Did you ever hear her say, No, it d0n't,' 'etc.? Don't you love that, fellow students? Don't all speak at once! Oh, Miss Luckey, practice what you preach! Miss Cassidy, we mean Veda, is the goddess who gives wings to words. Hers is the ability to pound the keys- no. don't fool yourselves she is not an accomplished pianist. So, by the process of elimination, we'll admit that she's a typist. Wonderful deductiong worthy of the great Plato! She had one wild time in Washington, all right. She simply cut loose and threw all discretion to the winds. On the way down, the dining car held a great fascination for Veda, for some reason or other. We don't know, but We think it was' the good-looking chef who reigned supreme in the dominions of the dining car and kitchen. In Washington and Philadelphia she was out so late every night, or rather, so early,-that she generally ov- erslept the next morning, and was compelled to rush to catch up with the party. KA slight hyperhole, perhaps, but nevertheless, not far distant from the facts.J Of course she couldn't get breakfast, under the circumstan- ces, and so it would not be strange if she lost a few pounds as a result of that folly. If this occurred, she achieved her life-long ambition. Of late years she has been picturing herself as a sylph indulging in aesthetic dancing. Veda is wild, not only away from home, but actually in Warsaw! After one especially interesting date, she seemed to be feeling rather Moody. Heavens!! Did he have such an effect on you as all that, Veda? Miss Iva Chase, she who presides over the Domes- tic Science department of our ancient and honorable school-we drink to her health. Wonder how she hap- pened to take up that course, anyway? Sh-h, we'll whis- per it to you. It's a dead secret, so please don't let the cat out of the bag! You see, Miss Chase doesn't think that she will always teach, and her motto is prepared- ness, hence the Domestic Science course. She thinks that she can mask her real intentions by perfecting herself in these arts, under the disguise of teaching, but it's all as clear as daylight to us wise young students. Oh, you can't put anything over on us, Miss Chase, we weren't born yesterday! Remember the punch that the Juniors treated us to at their Prom, folks? We have it on good authority that Miss Chase concocted that mixture. Wonder if she thought we are all Chinese? We don't know how to ex- plain it otherwise, the fact that that punch tasted as though it were made nine-tenths of tea, yes, TEA, peo- ple! Is it any wonder, then, that everyone woke up with a ripping head-ache, the morning after the night be- fore? ' They tell us that Miss Chase is a good Presbyterian. Wonder if she thinks that that will help to secure her entrance to the Pearly Gates? She sure will need help, when St. Peter hears about the effect of that punch! Ooh,-Miss Searls, what's this that we hear about you and your wild dates? You must be SOME vamp if you can make Lewis B. succumb to your charms! Think of it, folks, Lewis the Invincible, Lewis the Woman-Hater, was so entranced that he was caught in the net of the beautiful Miss Searls, and as a result, actually asked her to go to a show one night. F' Heaven sake, be careful, Pose ! What would Carl say if he heard about it,-or Windsor? We're willing to wager as much as a half a cent that you've broken a good many hearts already. Will you take us up on it? Ah ha! You decline to bet that much, because you know you'll lose!! Ask Miss Searls about her trip to 'Washington,-no,

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June, 1924 T H E B L A S T Page Twenty-nine usually at a base ball game, or other exhibition of ath- letic skill. Just ask the fellows who play, if you want any further particulars on this subject. He is such an ardent devotee of the school that it makes him nervous when our opponents are ahead. Well, he has to have a safety-valve some way, or he'd blow upg hence, he takes it out on the fellows. Therefore, fellows, when he's balllng you out, take it with good grace, because you see, you are in reality doing a great deed for humanity. So Miss Ward is next? Ah, yes-she is the short, stout, little instructor whom one can tell a mile off. She teaches English, and they say she's a whale at it, too, Did you ever know that Miss Ward is a nature lover? Yes, she really is. Why just the other day her wonderful sense of natural beauty was displayed when she remarked that the carrots she was eating tasted iden- tically like geranium plants smell. How's that for a poetical thought? It is generally understood that ever since she was knee-high to a grasshopper she has always regarded nature study as her true vocation. Wonder how she happened to miss it? Of late, she has been evincing a growing interest in German-no, don't make any mistake. It's not the lang- uage: it's just-well, A German . Get the JO-ke, Miss Ward? Oh well, we won't say any more about it. We know that we already have your goat securely tied, and the possibility of its getting loose again very soon is slight, indeed. A certain Moon has looked sort of muddy of late. What's the matter, Miss Ward, haven't you had any spare time to wash her up? How well we recall a certain day when-'Nuff said! Miss Ethel Edick has a sweet job! Kismet has de- creed that she preside over the Biology department, at least for a short length of time. Oh, boy-how she does preside!! They have a holy circus in that room most of the time. Anyway, so it sounds to those who happen to be in the adjoining rooms. Frankly, we wonder just what sort of discipline she has? She is very devoted to her pupils-and, strange to say, she jumps on their necks when they don't happen to have their lessons. Some system, we'll say! We have often wondered why so many people take Biology, but now all things have been elucidated, Mr. Preston is pretty wise in employing a teacher whose methods are so unique, A little bird told us that Miss Edick has an ardent admirer in Rochester. Small wonder, then, that she vamps her dad into getting a pass for her on the B. R. Kr P. Railroad! Somewhere, we have heard that passes are issued only to young people who are dependent on others, that is, who have no direct source of income. How about it, Miss Edick? Can you explain that? If not, you may go to the office at once! Our friend, Andy, seems to be sort of a magnetg at any rate, he possesses the ability of attracting. Miss Edick and Miss Luckey are aparently trying to outdo each other in winning his favor. Whom are you betting on, folks? They're both SOME vampsg they certainly make Theda Bara look sick. We shouldn't be surprised if there were a chance for them in the movies,-in the comedies. Miss Esther Cofield is the absent-minded teacher of Warsaw High, we take it. Honestly, this is a factg ev61'Y time she starts to say anything she forgetswhat she .is talking about and veers off on some other subject utterly foreign to the one supposed to be under discussion. Now we ask you, isn't that terrible? We're awfully afraid that she's beyond all help! There's one consulation, tho--every time that Esther gets to day-dreaming, her pupils can take a much need- ed rest. As this occurs quite often, it is safe to say that no one in her classes is what one might call overworked. By resting all day in school they are fully prepared for the coming night. When a person comes to think of lt, that's mighty considerate of Miss Cofield. All together, now, three cheers and a tiger! Ah, tha,t.'s,.the spirit! It shows how much you appreciate what she has.,done,.B.nd. What she is doing for you. She hails from out Leicester wayg you know, on the road to Geneseo. Have you ever been to Leicester? If so, we think that you can readily find an explanation for Esther's apparently somnolent mind. Environment has a great influence on moulding character. Oh, by the way, remember that trip to Rochester last winter? Oh, you know which night we mean- when a whole crowd went down to see Macbeth. The next day, when Miss Cofield was walking down Main Street, she startled her companions with the cry, Oh, look quick! There's a policeman eight feet high over there! , Now eight feet is rather an unusual stature for any mere man of today, so naturally everyone looked! They saw-guess what? No, not a giant, as you may have sur- mised, but a policeman of ordinary height, adorning a box! Say, it was rare! Those who were present at the time will not forget that little incident very soon. Miss Hazel Hanchette teaches Francais and Es- panol, if you please, 'What a soft job, you'll say. Wait: pause a little, and reflect. A great many heated argu- ments come up in her classes, and the pupils invariably win. Imagine poor little Miss Hanchette, modest and un- assuming, pitted against a band of very knowing stud- ents, and trying in vain to tell her side of the story! Now, hasn't she your sympathy? If ever anyone was deserving of sympathy, she is. Have you heard that Miss Hanchette specializes in economy? She no sooner gets her check than she salts it down in the bank-and it stays there, too. No fol-de- rols for her, she is preparing for a rainy day, She makes

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June, 1924 T H E B L A S T Page Thirty-one to Philadelphia, if you want to hear about a spree. Oh, well, we don't blame you in the least, Miss Searls, for Carl certainly IS a nice looking chap. It's a beastly shame, tho, that that picture of you and he didn't come out! You remember the one, Jimmie O'Donnel snapped en route. Carl was so anxious for a picture of you and he together, that he told Jimmie there was five dol- lars in it for him if it was good. It looks to us as though Jimmie had a streak of bad luck. At the beginning of the term, Miss Searls was mighty strict about note passing during her study periods. Have you fellow-sufferers, which being interpreted, means school mates, noticed how differently she acts about it now? Notes are humming most of the time, and, as a rule. the greater part of them reach their destinations without being intercepted. How do you explain that? Oh. well, it's springs-and in the spring a young lady's tin this case,l fancy, lightly turns to thoughts of love. And still they come,-so it's Miss McNamara this time, is it? She's small, but oh my! There's just a little hit of his Satanic Majesty peeping out of the depths of snapping black eyes-and Mr. Hurry immediately fell a victim. The full Moon is on the wane, and now it has diminished to such proportions that we find two's com- pany, and three's a crowd. Miss McNamara loves her chosen vocation to such an extent that she would rather lead the Glee Club, or Warsaw Symphony Orchestra, than eat. Now what do you think of that? Isn't it just too wishy-washy for anything? Did you ever notice how late in the afternoons of practice days the members of these two noted organi- zations are dismissed? Well, Miss McNamara is of the opinion that everyone feels the same way she does a- bout itg viz, that they would prefer to spend these nice spring afternoons in developing their musical talent, than to-ah, go for a ride, perhaps. Say, do you happen to know that Miss McNamara is acquainted with Vincent Lopez, the leader of the famous Lopez Jazz Orchestra? Yes, she is, and she thinks that he's all to the mustard, too. Her highest ambition is to be leader of an orchestra which will far excell both Lo- pez's and Whiteman's. She doesn't want much, does she? Well, well, well,-here is Miss Bishop, or, in more affectionate terms, Bess. if you prefer. Did anyone notice a certain add in the Evening Tel- egraph some-ah, four weeks ago, we think it was? Here was its content: Wanted-a man: one of the tall and dark type preferred, but almost any kind accepted. Apply at ,........... West Buffalo Street, Warsaw, N. Y. The add at once attracted our attention, inasmuch as we recognized the address mentioned. Since then, we have awaited developments with great interest, and it seems that the add is at last to bear fruit. Advertising pays, all right. We have noticed a 1924 model, Buick coupe, is now at the beck and call of Miss Bishop, together with a chauf- feur who seems eager and willing to do his stuff, whenever Bess signifies her desire to go anywhere. Why, once right during school hours, when we were engaged in doing our beloved two minute drills, the Buick rolled up, Miss Bishop leisurely strolled out of school, got into the car, and was driven off with a great deal of pomp and ceremony. Can our Bess teach? 'We'll say she can! She some- times is compelled to use strenuous methods to impress her knowledge on the ivory domes of her pupils, but eventually, lt is absorbed,-so why worry? We'll admit that sarcasm is a mighty sharp instrument of torture,,but at that, it works. How about it, Bess? Here endeth this chronicle of ye teachers. SENIOR CLASS NOMINATIONS Class Crank ..........,.....,,,....,........,.......,.......... Happiest ........ .. Worst Flirt ...,....... Noisiost .........,... Freckliest .....,.,.....,.. Biggest Grind ..,.. Class Slacker ....... Biggest Bluffer ,.....,..,. Gayest Deceiver ........ Quietest ........,.,.,........,..,................ Biggest Swelled .......Louise Bristol ....,.....,,.Belle Evans Mary Howard ..........Hazel Luther .James 0'Donnell ......Stuart Shapiro ..........Lucy Tuttle Seth Wright Head .......,, ........Walter Ahner Margaret Calmes .Margaret Fisher Biggest Talker .....,............ ........... V incent Higgins Laziest .......................... , ........ Clayton Madison Class Sheik ................ .......... J ames Prentice Fastest Flapper ........... .... ..... M l randa Spink Class Hoodoo .................. ............................................ M lldred Weber Most Fickle ...,,.,...,.........,............................................................... Iola Baker Greatest Men Catchers ...... Mary Coleman and Mary McGee Softest Sissy .............,.,........................................... - .............. Norwood Hain Class Twins .,,.....,......,,.... Harold Kiel and Gooliest..- ....,... Harold Marchant Kendrick Richardson Fattest ,,,. ....................... ................... . G ladys Smith Most Religious .... ,.... ......... E 1 eanor 'Winger Class Vamp ......,... .................. J ulia Boyer Ugliest ................... Silliest. ...,.... ,......., , Greatest Liar .......... Handsomest .................. Class Dumbell ........... Biggest Eater ,....,... Most Athletic ........... Featherweight ........ Man Hater ......,,.... Dizziest ....,.......,,... Sleepiest ..............., Woman Hater ......... Gigglest ..,,............ Worst Mess ..... ...... Ruth Embury ..........,Albert Hemenway .........................Leona Kiel Lyle Miller ...,.....Elsle Schneider ........Edward Thomson Edythe Winger Lois Andrews ........,.Charlotte ......Campbell Helen Gardner .......Elwln Johnson ...............James Reid Leila Snow ..........,Karl Weber