Waltham High School - Mirror Yearbook (Waltham, MA)

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22 'THE MIRROR There were two fellows there that the still-vigilant female cops should have evicted from the hall. Maybe they were lenient-or timid, I dunno. But these two were really too boister- ous. Two sun-tanned heeled and spurred cowboys with hair pants on were gallivantin' about the hall, oc- casionally uncorking a wicked-look- ing twenty-two pistol and discharg- ing the firearm carelessly into the air. And once, when I was floating about near the ceiling I actually felt one shot drill thru' me. Of course, it didn,t hurt much, but itis the idea of the thing. Why, I might have been killed! Who were the dairy- men? Robert Meactoa's and Earle Harvey. I heard they had their bucking Fords outside, saddled, bri- dled, cranked, and champing at the bit rarin' to go back where men are men. At the rather discourteous request of the female coppers, the cow- chasers beat a hasty exit, onsthreat of an indefinite incarceration at theilo- cal hoose-gow, and I once more took -up my 'sight-seeing trip' about the hall. it . - A gentleman clad in the regal, sombre habiliaments of a common butler, Fifth Avenue variety, strange- ly attracted my attention. It was Mayheni Angiig. All his youthful ambitions to be President, a senator., or at fireman had gone Hooey, and he had been forced to 'buttle for his breadt ' - Walking with Mayhew was Gosta Zanelen, who was dressed in the grey livery of the common chauffeur. The pair were arguing as to should take the parlor maid to a coming Hifi-Jinks for Hired Help, providing she re- covered from- the severe attack of house maid's knee with which she was afflicted. Gosta inadvertently let drop her name-Katherine Mitr- filiy. Katherine had been unable to attend the Reunion because her house maid's knee was worse, .so much worse that Charlestoning was a painful impossibility. Speaking of Mayhew's ambitions reminded me to look aboutfthe hall for Gerald Young, who 'had in his days of adolescence entertained a very laudable ambition to wield the fire-ax and' hose. I found him, in full parade regalia talking with- why, the little rascal Y-with William Sinitli, who also was decked out in helmet and night-hitch. They run in pairs. I'll bet Jed and Billy have the time of their tlives smashing windows, saving dogs and children, and having la good time in general, incidentally covering themselves with glory and soot. l I happened upon a very interesting character in Rath Sanderson. It was not until I had watched her puzzling antics for a fepv minutes that I could devine her vocation. First she would pass her hands a few times before the startled face of some classmate, anl hurl a few incoherent syllables into her teeth, and then-Saints above, she ,was queer! - whirled about thrice and spit contemptuously over her left shoulder. But after seeing her repeat this mad perfofm- ance a few times I guessed, and, I have reason to believe, rightly, that she was 121 hypnotist., V V y Following the .hypnotic :Ruth war- ily about' was Beatrice Andrews. I guessed ,that she intended to convey the idea -that she was a detective or detectivess- In her right hand. the females Sherlock'-:carried a large mi- crosco-pe, thru' which -Bea was in-- tently peering at all and sundry. She carefully scrutinized the -floor, the ceiling, her' hand, a mole on so.nebody's neck-in fact, she scruti- nized so scrutinizingly that I was forced to decamp to -another part of

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THE MIRROR 21 Charleston, I was. The world is made up ofsurprises. Eleanor Totten was dressed-er dressed-you help me out and imag- ine for yourself how a children's nurse would be dressed. Perhaps the print of small dirty fingers on a not overly-clean apron, safety pins, whistles, tops, and divers pieces of sticky candy artfully concealed about the person-just a case of using your imagination. As would be expected, Eleanor had seduced or coerced or maybe forced her bosom friend, Eleanor Magoon, to enter the same profession, if profession it is. Elean- or the Second wore a tired harassed look, but that's probably because shels the type that would spare the rod. I wager none of Eleanor the First's children spoiled for want of good sound chastisement. Just between you and me, Ivhave a sneaking suspicion that Marjorie M acN eil's senior play triumph went to her head, and stayed there. And not only that, but she, like Eleanor the First, beguiled an otherwise per- fectly proper young lady to join her-Ruth PVlialen. Actresses! Those wicked individuals referred to who wear extre ne, radical, silken cloth- ing. And I can remember Ruthie to be-b the kind of girl you could take home and introduce to your proud parents and maiden aunt and still get your weekly allowance. Ah, me, the lure of the footlights! ' In one corner 'Qsurprising how many people are tucked away in cor- nersj I ran across a group of young ladies animatedly discussing beauty culture. Seems there were lots of beauty culturists from our class. There was Susan Sibley, who used to worry so much over her coiffure, and Lorraine Downing, who used to pes- ter her classmates so much asking them if her lips were on straight, Natalie Mosher, whose pink, shell- like ears caused her so much loss of sleep because of their tendency to pro- trude, and Olga Larson,whosemilky- I mean milk-white, complexion was both the envy and pride of the school. There, I thought that was all, but it isn't. Edna Finney was there too. The part of the female physiognomy in which Edna specialized was the temple. Edna's temples are univer- sally considered the best developed, best proportioned, most expressive temples. anywhere around. Men nev- er notice such things, but much beau- ty lies latent in the female visages ab-out us. I may mention the beauty of our female friends, the dancing talent, the dramatic ability, and so on, but I really must pause a moment on the physical development question. Why, our school has turned out Goliathsl Mercuries! Samsons! Take Eleanor Childs, for instance, clad just as she is in bloomers and middy. A veritable he-woman! Twists iron bars, binds horseshoes, opens hermetically sealed sardine cans-a wonderful girl. And Doro- tlzy Taylor is another. Her chief ac- complishment is managing' a way- ward husband. And she's got that down to a science! And Elna An- derson- there's a marvelous speci- men of verile womanhood! Cranks the family Ford Qpre-1928 varietyy, stokes the family fire, and earns the family food. A woman of the ages, no less. Gertrude Main is anot'her. Teaches discus-heaving in the School for the Muscle-Bound. They use a man hole cover for a discus. But then, remember she is a graduate of Waltham High. It must be in the blood. Our Alma Mater has turned out some of the bloodiest athletes of the century. Already have I dwelt overly long on the prowess of our ladies of the so-called gym.

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THE MIRROR 23 the floor, for fear Bea would see me, invisible tho' I was. Arm-in-arm about the auditorium paraded four be-aproned females, smelling to Heaven of catsup and cheese and coffee and liver and onion. Rath Evans emitted an odor of roast turkey, while the stench of good old cheese of pre-Civil War vintage could be traced to Silvia Canter. Dorothy Mankozoitcli, Ismelt, was stationed at the fruit counter, while Deljina Ciarletta emitted the odor of good strong coffee. I don't want to convey the impression that these waitresses sznelt badly. On the con- trary, the whole concourse of odors blended aro natically and sweetly in- to one appetizing perfume. Oh, yes! Willingly would I omit this that is to follow. And yet, I must gird up my loins, bolster up my courage, draw my belt a notch tighten grit my teeth, go thru' various other ac- tions designed to instill fortitude and unwavering purpose, and tell the truth. It wouldn't be half so bad if there was only one of them, or we might even be forbearing and lenient with two, but alas and alack, they num- bered six. Six what, you ask? Six tramps, vagabonds, knights of the road, or just plain burns. It matters little what we call them, for the shoels on the same foot, no matter what color sock you wear. Paul Carey and Vincent Tracy were im- peccably clad in a much-worn outfit of beard,rags and yawning apertures. Willard Brown and Alvin Linnell wore toeless shoes and tieless collars, and Gay Perry and Herbert Howe went them one better, in having shoe- less feet and collarless necks. Ah, well, there are some people always within our midst, attired perhaps more meticulously and with more of a fastidious eye for the niceties of dress, who do not a whit more Work than do our track-walking brethren. In one section of the hall, farthest removed from the wail and blare of the laboring musicians I found a sizable gathering of twenty-eighters huddled like so many sheep about one central object. The nucleus of this herd of lambkins I found to be Beth Higgins. At the point of my arrival Beth, on being severely pressed by the crowd, had consented to pass out some vocal selections. Perhaps you'll remember Beth's vocals in high school. On hearing her declare that she would sing, I quit the hall, and continued my stroll on the unyielding waters of the Charles. It was while I was sitting perched precariously on the prow of a con- venient canoe that was parked in mid-stream minus tail light or for- ward parking illumination of any sort, trying not to watch the en- amoured couple contained therein- it was then that It happened. The It referred to was nothing more or less than the abrupt appear- ance of a brother ghost. As com- mon courtesy is due to all brother spooks, I greeted the apparition, al- beit in a perfunctory manner. You see, I was afraid it might be a lady ghost, and any cordiality towards that form of Wraith could easily end in embarrassing complications. However, a well-delivered not-too- gentle clout on the back proved that the newcomer was no lady, and a yelled Horackl told me that I was known. It was Walter Peirce. After I had affectionately mas- saged his misty person with playful wallops and loving thumpings, we sat ourselves down for a long, heart- to-heart talk. First Walter told me about him- self. After his high school days Mr. Peirce had taken up his cavalry work