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Page 120 text:
Professor. " Man can never fly till he becomes an angel. " Professor Brooks (to Leavens). " Excuse me, I ' ve been laboring under the impression that you were a Freshman ; but you are Professor of English Babson, are you not ? " Professor Mills. " That was a good square bolt your class got on me to-day. I was off my trolley. " Hammer rooms at Mrs. Baker ' s. During an evening pillow fight Hammar throws his room-mate out of bed upon the floor. Mrs. Baker, hearing the noise, comes to the stairway. Mrs. Baker. " Aren ' t you making a good deal of noise, Mr. Hammar ? " Hammar. " Yes ' m. I just dropped my Webster ' s Dictionary on the floor. " Lewis, just starting for the World ' s Fair, is approached by Keith, who grasps him by the hand and says earnestly : " Good-bye, Lewis. God bless you. Look out for those d d Anarchists. " Professor Stone. " What is grafting ? " Barry. " It is cutting the tree open to let the air out. " Professor Stone. " What is morphology ? " Goessmann. " The study of moths and butterflies. " Professor M. " What do market gardeners build fences for ? " Rawson. " To lean shutters up against. " Lieutenant (to Bagg, ' 97). " You walk like an old cow. " Barry. " Say, can you bolt if you want to ? " Lieutenant (to J. Jones). " You have three unexcused absences. What are your excuses ? " Jones. " I haven ' t had time to make up any. " Lieutenant (in drawing room, temperature 43° above). " Are your hands cold? " J. Jones. " Yes, sir. " Lieutenant. " Mine aint. " J. Jones. " I know it. You ' ve got yours in your pocket. " Prexy. " Well, if I ' m here, I ' ll be here. " 92
Page 119 text:
31lean 3liUn! Professor M. " There are ten thousand acres of celery in Michigan. " Sully (with a tired expression ). " Do they use machines to bank it ? " Professor W. " If you are ready now, Mr. Hemenway, we will listen to you. " Hemenway. " I ' m not ready yet. My answer is six ten-millionths out of the waj " FRESH L x (to Prof. M.). " I can ' t mount this specimen ; the petals are very deliquescent. " Morse, ' 95 (defining function). " Function is the duty of an organ. " Professor. " A pipe organ or a reed organ ? " Morse. " I guess it ' s a melodeon. " Professor. " Does the salt come from the ocean, Mr. Read, or the ocean come from the salt ? " Read, ' 95. " The ocean comes from the salt. " TsuDA. " What is this cribbing ? " Stevens, ' 95. " It is biting the desk. " TsuDA. " Ah, ha ! I don ' t think anybody in my class does it. " Morse, ' 95 (outside recitation room door). " Prexy hasn ' t called on me for three days. " Prexy (suddenly appearing). " I ' ll try and get you to-morrow. " Professor W. (in physics). " If you were on one end of the rope what would the tension be, Mr. Boardman ? " BoARDMAN. " About one hundred and eighty-six pounds. " Morse, ' 95. " I wouldn ' t be seen cribbing. " Burrinoton. " Hemenway spends the least time between the College and the Boarding Club, and Brown, ' 94, the most. " ' Professor, " Are the nitrates generally applied soluble or insoluble, Mr, Burgess ? " Buk(;kss (waking up, emphatically). " Yes, sir. " 9 '
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