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Page 97 text:
Fl-nt. — " Deep versed in books but shallow in himself, female of sex he seems. " F-SH.— " O flesh, flesh, how art thou fishified. " H-WE, E. D. — " A sweet attractive kind of grace, A full assurance given by looks, Continual comfort in a face, Tlie lineaments of Gospel books. " P-EK-NS. — " Now will I show myself to have more of the serpent than the dove ; that is, more knave than fool. " H-LL-ND. — " Here is everything advantageous to life ? " Fl-tch-r. — " A kind ot excellent dumb discourse. " M-Y. — " That man that hath a tongue, I say, is no man, if with that tongue he cannot win a woman. " K-NGM-N. — " I hold you as a thing enskied and sainted. " Sh-ver-ck. — " One Pinch, a hungry lean faced villain, a mere anatomy. " C-NG-R. " Egregiously an ass. " Pl-mb. — " Thou wilt depart and leave the world no copy. " Ch-ndl-r. — " The baby figure of a giant mass. " K-NPi-LD. — " Thou art proclaimed a fool ; methinks thou hast no more brain than I have in my elbow. " L-BL-N. — " Green in judgment ; don ' t know a hawk from a handsaw. " ' 81 — Index Board. — " Fellows of no marked likelihood. " 79
Page 99 text:
ei4 § h ' C tc c , UST before going to press, an Index editor found the following letter in an ash pan in one of the halls, and thinking it too good to " ( be lost, even though the production of a Freshman, before return- ing it to the author, obtained a copy, which reads as follows : M. A. C, Nov. 8th, 1880. My Dear Friend : — You are probably waiting to hear from me, and anxious to learn how I am getting along. I am well settled at last, and find the Agricultural College a very pleasant place to pursue my studies. I will not weary you with a dull account of my daily routine, but perhaps you may be interested in learning something about my associates and the Faculty. One poor fellow they call " Megalops, " for what reason I cannot say. Another is called " Fiend, " because he smokes so much. This I think is a very appropriate name for him. He has a wee bit of a moustache, the color of brick, and the boys say he is afraid to cut it off for fear it won ' t grow out again. But the fiend that beats them all is the " Fiddle Fiend. " He hails from Berkshire, and plays at the piano, violin, bass viol, flute, tin horn, and I hear he has been trying to get music out of a corn stalk fiddle. This fellow will buy every old worn out instrument and all the second-hand music that he can lay hold of, and the infernal strains that come from this dilapidated source are a libel on the whole college. There are several other fellows nicknamed " Yarmouth, " " H. F. M. Pinafore, " " Cape Cod, " etc., about whom I will say no more than to declare them freaks of human nature. As for the Faculty, I like them all very much. President Stockbridge appears to be a very pleasant, but rather a garrulous gentleman. They call him " Stock, " for short. He is of medium height, has a sandy beard, and lisps a little when he talks. The boys say it is because his denticulated ori- fice has been undergoing repairs ; and the Sophs also say that his pedal extremities have an incline axis of sixty degrees. Professor Graves, aZi ' as " Prof. Billy, " I also like very much. He is a little bald, and full of stale jokes, but the greatest compliment he ever gave us was to tell us we were the poorest class he ever saw. 81
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