University of Texas Austin - Cactus Yearbook (Austin, TX)

CACTUS THORN Cftotce Pits; on tfje iStttotts; A LIST OF RULES FOR FACULTY WOMEN THE gentle reminder was sent anonymously to the office of our Fiend of Wimmen, who turned it over to the Idiots in Chief of the Grind Section for their opinion on the matter. The Idiots see no reason why the womanhood of the faculty should not be subject to a thorough Christian Laundry once a week the same as the student femmes enjoy; they aver that the Campus Blue Law Baiters are right. Glory to God and Down with Vice! 1. All faculty women under the age of discretion must retire by eight o ' clock. 2. All parties for faculty women under the age of discretion and all parties in which there are less than ten must be properly chaperoned, preferably a chaperone per person. 3. Members may go auto riding in the city limits in the day time with a chaperone individually approved of by the Dean of Women, the President of the University, and the Pastor of their Church. 4. Members may have one (1) caller a week, and such call shall not last longer than two hours. 5. Members may not receive gifts from callers other than approved books (Harold Bell Wright and Annie Fellows Johnson preferred ). and wholesome candy — Woodward ' s sugar sticks and Angelus Marshmallows only. 6. No card playing, dancing, or other rough stuff is tolerated. Tiddledy Winks and Jack may be played until 8:00 p. m. Dominoes not permitted, and each newcomer will be searched to i that she has none. 7. Members may go to the Library in groups of not less than twenty and : later than 9:00 p. m. 8. Any faculty woman who catches any other violating the above rides is hereby urged to report the dereliction to the house mother and the guilty member will be penalized by having to correct all themes and quiz papers belonging to the accussee. This is for the purposes of encouraging spying and laziness among members. Marie Sapper, the little freethinker and Bohemian Baby from Galveston Beach, has at last snapped out of the social oblivion which shrouded her initial two years at Varsity. Tins latest practioneer of the " I don ' t care " technique was responsible for the triangular shift date cycle. Such things as climb- ing in the Kappa window and stumbling over the wicker bassinette (placed there for use in emergency- only) neither cooled nor deferred the ardor of her dateing. It is said that she manages the thing by having one leave at the front door while the second waits at the rear, but we have been unable to discover just how the third comes in gracefully — possibly disguised as a messenger-boy with ti dings that her favorite grandmother has just done what accommodating grandmothers usually do on such occasions. Bowery Ann, one of the group of Theta freshmen that is like horseradish in the chapter ' ; announces through these columns that she conforms to all rules laid down in the Handbook and i latest Newtonian Edition of Science and Health. Poor Ann was recently and unjustly accused of being seen " catching that ozone. " but immediately explained that " it was Murrel on the back seat with that boy. " Selah! mder if the 1 ' ullr The Thetas announce to the masculine part of the Campus, that they are now providing asbestos petting frocks for all their hot-rocks. There is. consequently, little fear of a repetition of the sofa con- flagration which Caffal promoted last spring. Mildred Chambers and Etta Gilbert are charming to ook upon in their recherche attire. Beat-em-to-it Berb, the San Antonio Big-Eyes, has the gentle- art of alihi-ing down to a point where the Bible seems weak in comparison. When Bosom-Mate Chiles proffered a drive to the Lake as a substitute for Hen ' s afternoon Movie, the plague descended upon fair Big-Eyes and Fattums was directed to cure her by the floral method. Four Roses — er — American Beauties, we mean, were his prescription. Immediately after Ins departure, the happy couple filtered out to the Lake. Hen followed a delivery boy who brought the floral tribute, by about fifty yards, but when he arrived, she was not. Hen de- parted meditating, and making big vengeance — medicine within himself. But when Berbelinda the — aw let it go— beautiful returned and learned the state of things she merely yawned and reached for the phone. And in ten minutes Hen had apoligized thrice, and was fishing in the mail box for the flower bill he had posted to Berb. This is sad, for Brown Eyes was due to come across for the chrysanthemums she had charged to little Mama Taylor and Valentino Jack Chiles on other occasions.