University of Rhode Island - Renaissance / Grist Yearbook (Kingston, RI)

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THE GRIST Harold Arnold Easterbrooks Where, when, and exactly how it happened, we don’t know, but anyway it came about that “Biff ” appeared one pleasant sunny morning in Bristol many years ago; and following the custom of the Herreshoffs, he was launched into the troubles of life with a bottle. “Biff’s” inborn genius early became apparent, and in his innate desire to satisfy his “hankerings” for science, he used to frequent the seashore and look for crabs, lobsters, and other interesting examples of marine life. His interesting research work along these lines will soon be made public in a bulletin entitled, “Wild Lobsters I Have Known, their Haunts and How to Get ’em. ’ ’ “ Biff’s” interest in such tilings, however, faded in a marked degree when he reached the high-school age and simultaneously the long-pants era. to be surely but slowly superseded by a fondness for the gentler sex, which he fostered till he was specializing in the latter subject. Although he came home each evening with high marks in this specialty , it was thought by larger and wiser heads that a change of scenery was desirable. He was accordingly shipped to Washington, I). C., where he completed his high-school course and graduated with attendant honors. From here he went back to Bristol to bone up for entrance at R. I. C. and spruce up in his high-school specialty. When “Biff” reached R. I. C.. he experienced a change in name without the customary bottle, and was disappointed, being hailed as “Helen” without the Miss in front. “Biff” was recognized as a decorator by his grass-grown countenance, which has resulted in a large number of dull razors in the dormitory. The latest heard from him shows that he again yearns or a “specialty” to study; accordingly he has been trying to find a substitute for Good Ale in Westerly. He has found both the much looked for substitute for ale as well as Good Ale, and seems to be doing well in the new industry, both at Kingston and Westerly. “Biff” is now making good in biology and zoology in a way that assures us that he will be the “ Bugologist ” of MC3VIX, and necessarily a successful one. As a further reference on the life of “Biff.” we would refer by special permission to “In Old Narragansett ” (Pier).

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THE GRIST J 8 Robert Winthrop Cummings Notice the angelic expression? That’s Patsy’s” most useful mask. He came by it honestly though ; he was born on Sunday, December 25, ’87. His cards bear the imposing legend, “R. Winthrop Cummings,” but he is widely known by the more classic name of “Patsy. ’ ’ As a Freshman he was noticeable at first by his meek air and genial manner: but more especially for the extremes of modishness to which he drove his tailor. Large coats, heavily padded on the shoulders, and trousers “pegged” till they looked “Dutch,” made him resemble the caricatures of college sports. He shed these fads as he outgrew the effects of those last years at “Orange High.” At the end of his first year at R. I. C., in attempting to merit the term, “sport, ” he imbibed the true spirit to such an extent that he threw ' away his dandy togs, even to his shoes, and dejectedly accepted the advice and guidance of those who have since become his best friends. Among us he is noted for his happy-go-lucky readiness for any and all projects that don’t sound like work, being oblivious to con- sequences. He has been of much value to athletics by his devotion to scrub teams, and his ability to originate new pla 3 ' s has kept football men studying signals overtime. Since his Freshmen j ' ear w ' as so effective in sophisticating him, he has even considered it his special duty to initiate all Freshies, and to guide them safely(?) through the intricate ways that puzzle new ' men. His versatile powers are in demand w ' hether it be as coach for class teams, in which position he is in his glory, or as guide on the broad “ Patsy ” smooth road to Wakefield, where he is most popular among the children (girls preferred,) for even a wank has been known to attract him. As an inmate of the dormitory his time was so completely taken up with affairs of under-class men, such as “bathing expeditions,” trips to Wakefield or Thirty-Acre, or just general rough-house, that his more important duties were neglected, and on the advice of higher authorities, he now resides at “Slack’s Retreat. ’ ’ He has some- how found time to establish a lively line of correspondence, as is attested by the weighty volumes received bearing the Orange postmark. “Patsy” has numerous philanthropic projects and ambitions, which few r even of his intimate friends suspect. As a side line with his other activities, he is taking the mechanical course, which he desires to master with the least possible amount of study, and he bids fair to break all records for obtaining good marks by his shrewdly assimilated knowledge. Some day he will renovate the industries of his state, and settle down to enjoy life with a certain Orange bud that has always been associated W ' ith his dreams of orange-blossoms. 26

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THE GRIST ■§€ John Ira Hardy In theTfall of 1907 when our class had attained the dignified(?) positionloffSophomores, a new face appeared in our midst. The fame of Dr. Leighton and the chemistry course had penetrated far into the wilds of Massachusetts and attracted hither this innocent, who bore the impressive name of John Ira Hardy. With characteristic good sense he at once joined the class of 1910 and never again did we go astray for lack of good advice. We call John our virtuous member, although he has learned not to carry virtue to extremes. Groveland is the particular spot in the northern wilderness where he originated, and there he spent his early life, breathing the puritanical air of that region. Finally the Groveland High School honored him with its diploma, and then little John ventured out into the wide, wicked world. His first stop was at “the city, where he devoted a summer to reforming the Bostonians, and learning machine work at Tech. After becoming an expert in this latter oc- cupation, he transferred the scene of his activities to the shops of Fitchburg, and later, Lynn. It was only for a short time, however, and then a longing for the aroma of the chemical laboratorj’’ and an ambition to smash test tubes, turned his steps toward Kingston and civilization. Upon his arrival at Davis Hall, John immediately made inquiries about V. M. C. A., and followed them up so industriously that he is now president of the association. It was V. M. C. A. business, John solemnly swears, that took him to Peace Dale so regularly last fall, but the wicked cynics would grin. It is altogether certain, however, that Fall River has for him a strange attraction, not connected with the V. M. C. A., although some one has suggested that she might belong to the Y. W. C. U. In spite of this affair, John was smitten with a peculiar disease in his Junior year. He grew absent-minded and preoccupied, and was often seen sitting by the window, gazing longingly up the path toward the village, and whistling a little tune about Dixie land. After the military ball, however, a wonderful improvement set in, and now John declares himself quite “unsophisticated.” This same year John donned a football suit with many misgivings as to whether or not he could make the second team. It soon developed, though, that he was a most strenuous Christian, and he very efficiently performed the grim duties of left tackle throughout the season, and at its close, was awarded his R. I. When John graduates, he intends to take advanced work at a large university, and then attack the chemical problems of the modern manufacturer. We may therefore infer that said problems stand in a most perilous situation. 30