Tuley High School - Log Yearbook (Chicago, IL)

 - Class of 1927

Page 79 of 142


Tuley High School - Log Yearbook (Chicago, IL) online yearbook collection, 1927 Edition, Page 79 of 142
Page 79 of 142

Tuley High School - Log Yearbook (Chicago, IL) online yearbook collection, 1927 Edition, Page 78
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Tuley High School - Log Yearbook (Chicago, IL) online yearbook collection, 1927 Edition, Page 80
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Page 79 text:

he warning Grapefruit VIOLENT RECEPTION GIVEN TO STEMPEL AND DURKO Flying in a ten-motored plane, Walter Stempel and Leopold Durko, in- trepid aviators, landed today in Mars, according to advices received here by wireless. The entire trip took three days, the flyers hopping off the Chicago Aviation field at five-thirty Monday morn- ing. This was the first time in history this daring feat was attempted, and its success has left the world speechless with amazement. VOL. 23 HEXTEMBER 56, 1963 No. VLIII DAREDEVIL FLYERS LAND ON MARSQ WILDLY ACCLAIMED CARDISIQWQKQPELT t 'teavf-' 1'-is rtionussscrwzqa 'rtr-isa iasv l ZION CITY LlNUlS'EH5H'.ff'7x K th ll irsw-,-out, , , 'A , L "rc J ig r 4, ,. ,as V ,A 's . 1 f "-if The town has QFOXVIE i PARXQA K- Si? .ferr ',j',5TjEi 1 1 wild over the coming o P , f"N :xii Eisley ' I the first Jewish cardinal ' ' fi! X il, X X , Zion City has ever seen. fi J ,f . 2. tif' Q 521. The streets are decorated f J , I K' if 1' X with confetti and festoons. Q f ft-"XA K! gh 4-'vi X The crowd is milling ft Qgfk X, ,A HY l 1 excitedly in front of the t ff ,141 Q f .f .E City Hall whers Co- 'fxaf fr xt ,XXX Mayors Harrv an Mar- , R f 'D ' 1 A . - .ew 4 . . cella Shapiro are pre- fo f N., t A 1 ri THX ' .Q senting the distinguished I UlN5FfUPl3lQL SX .2 I Xl Fiihilrhigib UMAFV visitor with the keys of 1 the city. COMMUNIST REBELS FREE LOVE The cardinal Mendel WIN LONG FOUGHT EXPONENT Doppelt, was a striking l BATTLE ' ARRESTED figure as he descended - FOR TALK from the 100 foot flyer, Canary Bird. He was brilliantly clothed in crim- son, with the wide card- inal's hat shading a he- nignant yet keen coun- tenance. To the reporters he said, "I attribute my success in life to my experience as Business Manager of the Tuley Review. ROADHOUSE RAID NETS NOTORIOUS NUTS Last night Chief of Police Louis Kessel made a raid on the Hotstuff Roadhouse with his trusty lieutenants, Sam Rabino- witz, Jack Krulin, Nathan Kraus, Leonard Wachs and Hymen Swardlov. Since he forgot to notify the proprietor Carl Lich- tenstein of the raid, many of the guests were caught with hooch and other unmentionables. Ezra Jacobson and Charlotte Goodman were the source of all the disturbance and as a reward got a free room in the police station. P Under the leadership of Abe Gans, ardent com- munist, a revolution has been instigated in Palestine to overthrow the government and es- tablish a free beanery for the hoboes. Late dis- patches say that the rebel forces have driven back the government troops to the Wailing Wall, and that a surprise attack will be made on the soldiers that stop to wail for awhile. In an impassioned speech to his troops, Gans said: "Ant Caesar, aut nullus, and every- body will have free meals." Sara Korman, his aide-de-camps in agreeing with him said that the same held true with the women also. FINANCIAL EXPERT MAKES MILLIONS IN STOCK The bottom fell through the stock market yester- day when Pasche Silvert fooled VVall Street when he bought out Mr. Cas- ner's Get-Rich-Quick stock. Although all the brokers expected the stock to take a big drop, Mr. David "Red" Auerback was arrested last night for making an ardent soap-box speech on the corner of Division and VVashtenaw advocating free-love. His voluntary supporter Helen Acker- man, by means of her dramatic ability, collected many hard earned pennies from the multitude after the speech. Lieutenant Petacque, policeman who was making his rounds at that time to collect the graft, arrested him for disturbing the public peace. Desk Sergeant Pawelczak however, let Mr. Auberbach free after a short confidential chat with him. Silvert's superior knowl- edge of financial affairs guided him on the right path and he cleaned up millions. VVhen asked what he intended to do with all his money, Mr. Silvert replied: "First of all, I'll leave a fund at Tuley which is to go for a scholarship for the one with the lowest graduat- ing average. " Y l l l l P l l I According to later radio messages received, the Grand High Chief of Mars has invited both Stempel and Durko to use his Russian Turkish bath, an honor that no one but the High Chief himself has enjoyed. No less than 999,999,999 Martians turned out en masse to help their chief fete the aviators. Upon interviewing the bold bird-men in their suite the newspaper men were astonished at hear- ing Durko remark, "I owe my success to my parents, Mr. Casner and My Alma Mater." HEART PHILANDERER IS SENTENCED TO LABOR Abraham ' 'Galahad ' ' Masover was convicted of bigamy in the tenth degree and was sentenced to twenty years of hard labor by Judge Bella Strauss, eminent female jurist. The two women in the case that completed this strange love triangle were Sadie Udell and Lucille Witkin. As Mas- over left court, both women said, "So von would, would you!" Pa gf T11 ziriy-jim'

Page 78 text:

THE LOG HATCHET ORATION 1927 SCENEI. SCENE: Negro Club at 35th Street. TIME: Forenoon. Curtains open disclosing room containing a business desk decorated with Howers, ribbons, vases, books, and sundry other articles fnot to speak of flags, and paper buntingsj Around walls are various signs Cln Fergie we trust, Kosher etc. and one big banner to this effect. 49th auxiliary of the 4th chapter of the Benevolent Order of G. C.l To one side is a pulpit or speaking stand on which is a large pitcher of water and a graduate glass and a drinking glass. In the back of desk a pair of hands are seen holding inverted issue of the "Forward", an alarm clock rings out and paper falls flat disclosing gentleman of color IB. EJ with im- mense black bow tie and loud checked jacket having large sunflower in button- hole. Grabs hammer lying on desk in right hand raises it and pounds for order with left fist, crying "Brethren of the Auxiliary 49th of the 4th chapter of the Benevolent Order of G. C. shall without further procrastinations assume an aspect and bearing worthy of assuring the chair of being possessed of its undivided atten- tion. For our initial problem today. Loud knock on lecture room door and Man also colored enters in football pants loud straw hat, white silk stockings, and swallow tail jacket, bearing in hand issue of Tuly Review, rushes up to stage, trips, falls, gets up, putting fallen hat on head, only to have it fall off, '4You-you-look-a-heah. You-you-see-heah-brothah. Wihat's a big idea writing yis ere blooey about the 'Sons and daughters of the Go Out and Seek Fourth Clubwin Tuley Review? Hah. "Scans overfirst seek, second and third, and fourth pages, then back to ISI page, inverts sheet brightens and points to corner, shoving same under CBen'sJ nose. Presiding Officer-"My deah fellah-hooman. Evidentually youre are suffer- ing from a hallucidation, wherein you are diluted. How evah if you will recom- pose yolself yonder-fpoints to chairj-I will dispose of you after our meeting which you have innerrupted. fTurns to audience folding hands and beamingl. Nowah Brethren to follow up our circum dicission of las Tuesday lastkw lrate Visitor Cspring up from chairl-"You-you look a heah.-See-See-heah brothan. As Presidend of 'Sons and daughters of the UGO Out and Seek Forth Club", Fm a wanting this settled. I-I-you-we-us-what's your idee writing this yere?" lGoes thro' same procedure as beforel. Presiding Officer Cshoving him back on chair. Ben has on golf knickersl- '4Brotah. Yis 'ere is a meeting of the 4Qth Auxiliary of the Fourth Chapter of the Benevolent order of G. C. which you proposes to disturb-. Set down or we'll have you dispersed with. Nowah Brethren, when in the coorse of human advents--" lrate Visitor tThrowing off jacket which displays sleeveless shirtJ-6'See-see- heah. Noah-look-heah. Hey what's bit idee 0' this. As President of 'fSons and daughters of the "Go Out and Seek Forth Club", l'm going to find out whyhu Presiding OHicer lReads at last article then sighs with relief and turns to Mikel --"Oh, that's it, am it? Well- noah, ah thought you wuz from the clothing store and wanted some money-Well what about dis heah?" lrate Visitor-"Now-now look-heah see-heah. Ah wants to know what yo put dat in fo?" Presiding Officer-l'Yo can read can you not-Well you know what it says does you not? If not Ifll read it fpicks up paperl 'To who mit may concern: Brotah you can't go wrong if you join the "49th Auxiliary of the Fourth Chapter of the Benevolent Order of G. C." But you is suah to flounder by joining the "Sons and Daughters of the "Go Out and Seek Forth Club". lt's a burn's club and I stands ready to prove my statements-Hashesh Vermellion 1313 13th Place. LTO visitorl 'At's plain, ain't it not?" Irate Visitor lPulling out pistoll-"Look heah, look heah, you-you, see heah, CContinued on page 375 Pagf Thirty-four

Page 80 text:

THE MORNING GRAPEFRUIT Entered as Second Class INQUIRING DRAMATIC THE RADIO WORLD Mail REPORTER COMMENTS i- Question asked by v Y V . V E. Jacosovrrz Peter Zukovsky 't . Petit Zukiivskyllftmak' Editor - - Esther Adelson pop- srf:ItilonreIT1Ii1FEuSwifhmhfis D'15EE11EiiON bhsggiogheffr lialiisnliffrz: ular male impersonator red hot syncopation ad- EDITORIALS ON THE FLIGHT The recent non-stop fllight to Mars has con- clusively shown that there is an imperative need for gasoline filling stations on the way to Mars. Luckily Stempel and Durko had the foresight to take some surplus fuel, for had their gasoline given out they would have failed most ignominously, and the human race would have been doomed for a solitary life on earth for perhaps another thousand years. Air space values are mounting steadily, and the young man with enough ambition can make a fortune by es- tablishing a string of coaling stations on the road to Mars. THE OLD AUTO The old fashioned auto- mobile is going out of use to give way to the airplane just as the auto- mobile surplanted the old horse and buggy, so the airplane is crowding out the auto. VVhat with the numerous accidents be- tween landing airplances and autos, the city council should pass an ordinance restricting only certain parts of the city to autos. It seems that an un- necessary cruelty is added to the otherwise hard life of our police force by not voting them an appropriation for silk underwear. There is a society for the prevention of cruelty to animals, yet our hard hearted citizens calmly watch our faithful policemen suffer in their coarse underclothing: For shame, citizenry, rise ye to the rescue! Pagf' T11 iffy-,t1' V ing kisses on telephone lines? Irving Reisler-Ab- solutely inexperienced with or without tele- phone. Still smoke Chcsterfields 5 they satisfy. Bertha Rottner-Think it very rude and crude question. Such things are only between my God and myself. Might put it in my diary though. Dorothy Richman- Now that's telling. I believe the right kind of a boy won't let a little thing like a telephone stand in his way. Pasche SilvertfMy Physic taught me that transmission tends to weaken and in case like this anything weakening is undesirable. Rose Sugar-Really now I think telephones are convenient for making appointments. Now I think the point in ques- tion is covered by the appointment in question. Emily Zdanke-We married women have no say in the matter. I think it a good thing for a girl who uses too much lipstick. Esther Simon-What an embarrassing question. That's similar to having hair-cuts wirlessed to a person. Decidedly not in favor of it. Rose Halperin-Ac- cording to the Tuley education that I got the hustler is the go-getter. So why let the young man get something he doesn't earn. Anna Seidman, Dora Rudman and Edna Gans wouldn't tell why but they voted unanimously no. recently gave a re-showing of the play, "In Spring A Young Man's Fancy." 'Tis rumored that she starred in this play when she was yet an infant in her high school days. Max Appelman and Jeanette Brichkee, co- stars in the play, t'Recip- rocated Love" have scored another hit. Ap- pelman's startling port- rayal of a love-sick youth has brought him to the fore as an expert char- acter man. Rose Becker and Frieda Bernstein have made over ten dollars in royalties on their last play, "How It Happened. I' The play ran for one night at the Harmony Theatre, owned by Wiilfred Carsel big checker king, and was forced to stop because Reeva Bruss, noted senta- mentalist, complained to the authorities. Ruth Friedman gave a charity bazaar for the theatrical folks last night. Among some of the famous screen and stage stars present were Helen Blaszcenski, Dora Rud- man, Matilda Rudman, Anne Brook, Sadie Bryer, Blanche Cramer and Miriam Emyanitoff.. . Meta Mantey, it IS rumored, is the richest scenario writer in the United States. She oyms, according to gossip, two chow puppies and a Packard Crooked eight airplane. She attributes her success to a High School teacher, one Miss Ferguson. She lives with Mary Brocko. MACHINE GUNS END GANG FUED Once again the deadly machine guns spoke, and once again a man kissed the pavement for the dicts. According to most people of today Zukovsky is the best jazz artist since the old-time Paul Ash and his orchestra. Rumor has it that he has just refused a million a year contract to play at the Oriental, for he prefers to play over the radio. When asked the reason for turning down so good an offer, Pete replied: "I blush fright- fully before large aud- iences and blushing just ruins my complexion, don't you know." Yes, we know. The nightly warblings that come from station YELL End their source in the larynx of Miss Ethel Fleischman, famous dramatic soprano. YVhen Miss Fleischman is not singing in the opera she is at the radio station, for she wishes to retain her popularity with her audiences. Sid Mussman, famous statesman, gave a highly interesting talk last night over station GRR, on the merits of the new street cleaning methods. Many telegrams have been re- ceived by the station threatening them with lynching and worse if they let Mussman speak again. count of ten. The gang fued between the Lebovitz faction and the Shane faction had its culmina- tion yesterday night in front of the Frolics Cab- aret, when Shane was, as the though express it, "bumped od." Shane was escorting Sally Schen- berg, start of "Abie's Irish Rose", when the occurrence occurred. As she fainted she was caught by " Swede " Rydell, door- man of the Cabaret.

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