Trinity College School - Record Yearbook (Port Hope, Ontario Canada)

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A Character Repent! Repent and God shall forgive your sins! Most of us have heard these words either from par- ents, our representatives from the church, or perhaps from one of the television preachers such as Billy Graham. I heard it from my roommate. For a good part of last year I endured an adjuration on the benefits of leading a good, Christian life. While being bombasted by his ideas about religion I took the position of being an athiest, saying that all he said was just foolish, archaic quibble. He soon realized that he was not going to convert me to his way of thinking by a fiery, oratorial approach. So, instead, every time I expressed a depressing thought such as, “What’s the use?” (referring to life in general), he would pounce on me with, “to serve God and his kingdom.” He soon gave this up after a few snide remarks from me about what he could do with his kingdom. Later in the year we entered into some heated discussions on the subject of religion, he taking the po- sition of the staunch ecclesiastic and I, of the athiest. These discussions were often one-sided as he knew a great deal more about what he was talking about than I did. When cornered on a particular point I could fall back on arguments such as, “If God really cares about us why does he let thousands starve to death?” These arguments can be successfully rebuked by anyone who knows the basics of Christian doctrine, but he never did. Perhaps he realized that he had me cornered and that I was defending my- self with irrelevant arguments. There was one point that I always pressed him with, knowing that he didn’t have an answer to it. The point was the existence of other religions. “How”, I asked him, “can you maintain that Christianity is THE true concept of God and divinity when over three-quarters of the world’s population believe dif- ferently?” He never had an answer to that, but his unshakable faith in what he believed left me some- what perplexed. He knew exactly what his purpose in life was. He knew what his reward for leading a good life would be, and what his punishments were for diver- ging from the right path. I had none of these convictions. I have often thought about the purpose of life. Short of defining it biologically I am at a loss to give one. He knew what the purpose of the human race was. Though I can find causes for the human race and can postulate on its future I can find no purpose. He knew what he wanted and expected from life. To me, my future life is a vast abyss. I am in the centre, not knowing where to go or what to do. It honestly frightens me at times. I often thought, “This guy is not connected with the real world”. Now I realize, however, that he was connected with it by a far stronger bond than I am. I picture myself as floating along, taking what comes, turning or falling in any direction as if connected by a loose cable. I see him going straight through this collage of events with a definite path and purpose as though he had hold of a rigid steel rod. I often thought that perhaps he was upholding someone else’s beliefs. But most people who hold someone else’s beliefs will falter when forced to explain the intricacies and extrapolations of these be- liefs. My roommate never faltered. He held steadfast to his beliefs and defended them as any person of genuine faith can. I looked upon him as a disturbed character because he was a very unsociable character. But he had the unique ability to enjoy himself immensely, by himself. He would return from a walk or a bird watching stint, feeling very happy. I only go on walks to indulge in introspection. I usually return de- I pressed, unless I have resolved a particular internal conflict. If he went on walks for the purpose of in- trospection he must have been happy with what he saw in himself. For that, I envy him. How did he look upon me? He saw me at the worst period of my life. That is when one can see the most in a person (in my opinion). I was depressed and very unhappy. I let my schoolwork slip. I hardly stu- died at all for the Christmas exams, yet I put up a front of cheerfulness. I pretended to be at home and comfortable at school. I believe he saw through this for he told me that the school is not meant to re- place your home. It may not be comfortable, but as long as you can make some concessions and compro- mises to a more regimented way of life, you will manage. I returned from the holidays in a much better frame of mind. My marks improved and the situation improved enough for me that I chose to return this Fall. He chose not to for reasons unknown to me. I don’t believe that I will ever see him again but I can-

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Images Images flowing through my mind The music a distant background To my memories Filling me with wonder, Then abruptly the music stops And the spaceship of my memories Quickly descends Only to be launched again, When the music plays another time. homeowner poet yesterday it rained i walked on the wet leaves of September’s glory dancing colours dead underfoot soon forgotten, until Sunday, burning ditches hold the celebration of the season missing the football game and leaning on a rake 9 Art

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ly no forget him. How much he affected my life, I do not know. One thing that I owe him that is present- mgible is my open-mindedness towards religion. I am not a believer in any particular religion, but te h e I ( estion atheism as I feel that it is extremely shallow in scope. I can see great virtue in religion. I no loi er believe that to believe in a typecast religion confines your paths of thought and narrows your at ity to perceive. It may even expand one’s sentient capabilities. is flaws also taught me a great deal. His reluctance to communicate with others taught rhe that at- pts at communication could only benefit you. He had the perfect defense for any pitfall that he may e stumbled into — his faith. I now believe that total dependence on faith as defense is not good. The eriences of pitfalls, though they may be unpleasant, will strengthen, and make more resilient, your cl racter. I still picture myself floating free in an abyss. 1 believe that 1 know why. I have no faith. I have no faith in anything. Without faith to provide some secure bond with the world I will con- tinue to float free. This is bv far the most important thing that I learned from my roommate, though it has not been until now, as I write this, that I realize it . '