St Michaels University School - Black Red and Blue Yearbook (Victoria, British Columbia Canada)

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The inspector said nothingg but at the first school he announced that he would see how well punctuation was taught. O never mind that , said the burgomaster, we care naught for commas and such triflcsf' But the inspector sent a boy to the blackboard and told him to write The burgomaster says, the inspector is an ass. Then he ordered him to transpose the comma, placing it after burgomaster and to insert another after the word inspector. Spelling too has its trials. A Spaniard was learning English and for his first spelling lesson his teacher gave him these lines: Though the tough cough and hiccough plough me through Cer life's dark lough my way I still pursue. And then there is the famous word Ghoughphtheightteeau. Who can pronounce that? Gh stands for p, as in the last letters of hiccoughg ough for o, as in dough, phth for t, as in pthisisg eigh for a, as in neighbour: tte for t, as in gazetteg eau for o, as in beau. Thus you have potato. Those who have to groan over the intricacies of French and the concords of Latin may readily sympathise with the foreigner who has to cope with English. Of examples of their mistakes there is no end. Will Lady Dufferin ever forget the Hindustani gentleman who, at Bhurtpore, addressed her by letter as Honoured Enormityvg that is to say if they remember such things where Lady Dufferin is now. And who has been to Osaka and forgotten the notice which says, The trees cutting, birds and beasts killing and cows and horses set' ting on free at the ground belonging to the government are prohibf itedf' And what of the bridge at Okayama which has a clock at each end with an inscription under each clock Tempus fugit or, as actually has been reproduced by the Japanese architect who thought that it was English, Tempus fugits. Sigismund, surnamed Augustus, had the right idea when he said, Ego sum Imperator Romanorum et supra grammaticamf' Let this comfort us all. Ohm meminisse jiwabitfl Strange though it may seem, much amusement may be derived from the perusal of old detention books. Memories are called up and old scenes reflived. The entries selected from a few old volumes may arouse tender recollections in the minds of Old Boys and Masters and may even suggest to present Boys new forms of entertainment. -23-

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Paper Weights:-Coe vs. Jones. jones, the winner, was more aggressive than his opponent, notwithstanding Coe deserves much credit for his im' proved exhibition. Light Weights:-Massy I vs. Maurer I. Massy gained the decision, rather by science than hard hitting. Maurer put up a plucky fight but was out' boxed. Middle Weights:-Teagle vs. Spencer. Teagle showed considerable skill and was really never extended, gaining the decision though Spencer showed considerable pluck against a more scientific boxer. Feather Weights:-.laeckell vs. Smith:-Iaeckel easily won this round, seiz' ing every opportunity. Smith put up a good fight but was too slow. Heavy Weights:-Sworder was decided the winner of the heavy weights their being no other boy in his respective class. School Championship:-Gee challenged Sworder. This was by far the best bout of the evening. Sworder trying to score a knockout in the first round kept Gee on the defence. In the remaining rounds Gee attacked and was given the decision. Much credit is due to the winner when it is realized that his opponent was 20 lbs. heavier. 'iCmmmar and Composition To some these are words that bring disgust: to some they act as a soporific and to a few they come as an awakening. But the boy who realises that such trifles as commas are not so trivial as they seem is rara avis indeed. The following stories may be new to some of our readers and may point a lesson. The misplacement of a comma once cost the government of the United States over two millions of dollars. There was a tariff bill which had a section enumerating the articles which were to be ad' mitted duty free. Among the many articles were all foreign fruit' plants , meaning plants for transplanting or experiment. The en' rolling clerk, in copying the bill, changed the hyphen in the com' pound word fruitfplants to a comma, making it read all fruit, plants, etc. with the result that for a year until Congress could remedy the blunder, all bananas, lemons, grapes and other foreign fruits were admitted free of duty. An Irishman was accused of robbery. His fate hung on a conf fession which a police officer had taken down from the prisoner's dictation. One sentence read: Mangaii said he never robbed but twice said it was Crawford. The ollicer explained that the meaning he attached to it was Mangan said he never robbed but twice, said it was Crawfordf' But his counsel persuaded the jury that it meant Mangan said he never robbedg but twice said it was Crawford. A Prussian school inspector appeared at the oliice of the burgof master of a little town and asked him to join in a tour of inspection. The burgomaster was out of sorts and did not want to go and was heard to murmur What is this ass here again for?

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Here is someone who had trouble with food: Worthington II . . Ferreting around in his pockets for food and surreptitiously nibbling it-2 hrs. And two days later, Worthington II . . found out of bed distributing food after lights out-1 hr. WHL. Quaint tastes are revealed in these entries: Blakey . . ill chosen literature-1 hr. HFW. and Blakey . . succumbing to an overfdeveloped sense of humour 5 hr. WHL. and still more Blakey . . Alarum clock on parade-1 hr. D.C.S. There is something objectively pathetic in the first and subjective' ly fand parentheticallyj in the second of this brace of entries: Ditmars, Allen, Swanson I, Roberts, Coleman II, Callahan-gated for smoking CAK LEAVES. ACB. Worthington II and Slater . . Throwing pebbles at window fminej-2 hrs DCS. Surely one may say that the child is father of the man when one reads: Hamber . . unsuccessful experiment on the equilibrim of a chair 1 hr. DCS. and wonder as to the scientific trend of Hendry, Squire, Rowe-heliography-5 hr. WHL. or the zoological researches of Ristine . . permitting thc entrance of extraneous feline-1 hr. D.C.S. Can this shew a trend towards philanthropy? Winch . . distributing pepper in hall-1 hr. DCS. Unseemly noises have added their quota to these books, as witness: Worthington II . . Unsolicited information-5 hr. DCS. Poyntz . . braying in class-5 hr. HFW. and one is tempted to wonder whether it was the toffee or the noisy mastication that brought forth the following: Squire . . audible chewing of toffee-2 hrs. RBW. There is a delightfully mediaeval touch about Clifford, Hutchings . . meddling with equipage of a visitor dur' ing lst xi match-2 hrs. RW.