St Johns College - Yearbook (Annapolis, MD)

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We are sorry to lose one of our members, but can spare him better than any of the others, for he is a dry old stick with never a blossom of wit or wisdom. We fear his head is permanently injured. ' . Another thing which causes regret is the separation of the 'Htwin Williesf' To say thebest of them, they are a nuisance, because of the trouble they make in the nursery. The best way to dispose of them would be to place them both in one room where they would be company for each other. One night there was a dispute between the two twins, and before Chapel next morning, .on the dislodged towel-rack out in the hall hung Willie G's poor little silk stockings. A reconciliation has been accomplished, but never will they consent toroom together again. So we might go on and on telling of Burroughs' enthusiastic defense of Rayner, of Hodges' Southern sympathies, of Stick's play-'writing propensities, of Padgett's pas- toral aptitudes, of a score of things, but the space assigned is filled, the sun is sinking in the West, the Historian's cushion is becoming hard, his pipe is aTmost red-hot, and there is a yell in the hall which must be heeded: H'ray, h'ray, h'ray! Sam Montgomery! Attention! HALT! A 5 5 O5 goo so 'Q Sang 0 , T75 n 'S 'Oo 5 ' - 0 C .23 33 23353 '1 ia9602!f do .1 - is ' . cf r 0 0533 5 a 57

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slowly to and fro, lost in his song. Then Scabby would display his fine chest and broad shoulders, Masey would set up the cigars, Wirt would turn out the lights C1113 p.m.D and all would go to bed. At other times the exercises would take the form of a comic opera, in which Mooney was always star comedian. Music was furnished by those who got hold of the instru- ments first, and everybody joined in a march up and down the hall to the tune of You Don't Belong to the Regularsj' or some other popular song. Mooney would break out from the crowd and give us an imitation o' dem goo-goo eyes. Instruments would be thrown aside and attention given to that veritable mimic. He, being instructor, would hear a recitation in Greek from Mr. Mudd. That gentleman having responded, and having received three zips and reported once or twice, Mooney would proceed to show how Booby Hall dances, how Mallory draws his sword, and several other hows, after which he would rush to his room. Upon being implored to come out and prolong the exhibition, he would stick his head out of the door and say Hain' goin' tell ye, slam the door, and go to bed. Then a general entertainment would ensue. Mersey and Scabby would perform the illustrated joke 5 Old Lady would sing If I Were Only Sam Montgomery, Masey would refuse the cigars, and we would retire to our respective dens. Thus has time passed, with never a day lacking its quota of fun. We were much surprised one day when Beachley contributed a mite and sprung 'a joke. It is his best, worst, and only joke and deserves repetition. H Once upon a time a man owned a big speckled hen which laid an egg every day. One day he put a large porcelain egg in the nest and to his surprise the hen laid one that he could not tell from it. 'By J ove,' he thought. aloud, 'if she will only lay one as large as the nest egg every day, I have a fortune' So he put in a goose egg next time. The hen deposited one just as large. With the dream of 'get-rich-quick,' he whitewashed a foot- ball and put it in the nest. Next day he was rewarded with an egg as large as the pigskin, but was startled by a label on it saying, 'What do you take me for, an ostrich?' He broke the egg and-the hen was inside. Q . Do you see the joke? 'No one did when he told it,.but the sickly grin he produced was the cause of some merriment. ' This reminds me of Scabby's frog tale Eve used to tell Abel. We won't tell it, nor will weadmit that Scabby is not original. If he can't construct a good joke, he can make a house from cellar to attic in a week Cthat is, on paperj, and do it well. He is going to plan a club house for Morgan next summer. We have ponies, automobiles and almost every other kind of conveyance in the Hall, but the most peculiar and most dreaded is the water-wagon. It probably derives its name from the fact that nothing stronger than water may be used to lubricate its many and intricate parts. It rides hard, especially on Saturday nights 5 and a throw is dangerous, chiefly because the victim must nurse his injuries in silence. You remember that earth- quake shock at Annapolis,,reported some time ago? That shock was caused by Hick and Old Lady falling simultaneously from the awe-inspiring wagon. They escaped with their lives, but both suffered painful injuries. Old Lady had the jim-jams, and Hick an abnormal enlargement of the cranium. Since the fall, Hick has retired to his den, and opens up for neither saint nor sinner. Sometimes we see him go out to the letter box and back again. When he talks he says he is taking a correspondence course. it 56

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