St Johns College - Yearbook (Annapolis, MD)

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.H Friendly Office -llilil What's the matter, Jack? Disappointed in love? That letter must have come from an indigo factory. Jack Abernathy said nothing, so Jarvis continued: If I'd know who has been making trouble for my room-mate I'd raise a disturbance. What can it be-? The old boy is up in his class, has good health, and is doing well generally, so far as I can see. It must belove.. By jove, it's love, I'll' bet a 'dol-lar! Come, Jack, tell us about it. Go to the devil, politely remarked J ack 5 and he started to read the letter a second time. Jarvis, apparently much hurt, puffed stolidly on his bull-dog pipe, remarking between puffs what an utter idiot he had for a room-mate. How soft he was. How- oh, rats! And Jarvis hastily prepared for bed. f J ' ' After reading the letter over a half-dozen times, Jack swore extravagantly and lighted a cigarette to think the matter over... Finally he threw a shoe at Jarvis, who was snoozing placidly, and bade him listen. Jarvis, I've got a hard-luck story to tell you. There is la- little girl up in Hosack who has passed the competitive examination for the name of Mrs. Abernathy. We grew up together and I always thought seriously of her as my own, but I learn that a young genius by the name of Rampart is making himself busy around her home, and this evening I got a cold-storage letter from her. Now, whatl wantlyou to do is to go home with me for Easter and tell her some continued stories with Jack as hero. Understand? I think it -will be O. K. when I get there, but I need a good liar to add color to the thing. Will you do it? 4 I ' ' . Ugh, responded Jarvis, with his head buried in the pillow. V Wake up, old chap. ,Won't you do it? Go to bed, Jack. Don't bother me. ' But, you beastly smug-faced deacon, can't you tell me if you'll do it? What+is it? I'll-do it. Go to bed. - And Jarvis began snoring most reprehensibly. When Easter came, T ack held Jarvis to his promise, although that most estimable younggentleman denied allrecolleotion of having made such a promise. The first night in.Hosack, our two collegians called on Miss Ferguson. It was not a hard matter for Jarvls to engage the young lady's attention, and, very naturally, the conversation turned on Jack, who was then telling Mrs. Ferguson sundrylyarns .concerning his cohege life and tie positions that had been offered him upon graduation. s - Y 1 ' uppose you now my room mate pretty well, don t you, Miss Ferguson ? Oh, yes. We grew up together. X Pretty nice sort of a chap. Indeed? , ies

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Extraordinary Men in Jpecial Capacities , -1.-i Best Athlete, . . . . ERT. Greatest Prevaricator, . SOMER. Most scintillating in brilliancy, . POKEY. Divinest looker, . . GREEN. Oldest, .... . . HANCE. Youngest, . . R CHAMBERS. Busiest, .... . RAT-TAT MANAGERS. Most ponderous, . . . ..... BONES. Gentleman of greatest longitude, . . . A R. . . TOWERS. Jewiest Jew, . . . , . Tie between MASEY, and STRANGE. Most captivating smiler, . ..... FOX. Broadest grinner, . ' A . HUTCHINS. Utilizer of most leather, .. . MALLORY. Sweetest singer, ' . . MCCARDELL Most sentimental, . WIRT. Funniest, .... . RILEY- Best fullback, I. E . . SHERWOOD. Most satisfactory Cto himselfj, . MOORE. Most ambitious, . .E V PREP- Best soldier, . . . . MORRIS- Largest appetite, - HODGSON- Loudest snorer, . RASIN- Most liberal, . . - KEMP- Greatest theatre-goer, - MCBRIDE- PENNELL. Best dancer, . 187

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n I Yes.p You see he has roomed with me three years, and 1 happened to catch on to tl1e general trend of his character. It must be fine to room with a fellow who is agreeable to you. Jarvis was beginning to notice Miss Ferguson's eyes. They were deep blue, and they had a most fascinating sparkle. However, he setlout to do his duty. It isn't my .fault that Jack and I get along well together. You see, he is a very popular chap and I'd be afraid to fall out with him. I imagine. , ' Yes. But he furnishes most of the congeniality at our house. Ah, modesty! p - V ' No. It is a common saying that anyone who can't get along with Jack Abernathy needs liver medicine. I Miss Ferguson began to notice J arvis' persistency, and to suspect that a game was being played at her expense. I . . V I suppose Jack is very religious? She knew full well that he was not. A Oh, yesi Served one term as president of fthe Y. M. C. A. ' f'Does he take part in athletics? c ' . Does he! Why, he's our all around-athlete, and he went on to tell how Jack had won the big game of football the year before. V Q p Why, Mr. Jarvis! The papers said you did that. ' . Of course they did. His parents objected to his playing, so he used my name. I don't understand. They often do that. The captain of the team one year played under an assumed name. ' I mean I don't understand why he should do it, and there was a twinkle in her eyes as she said: Mr. Abernathy always wished that Jack would take part in athletics. Jarvis was trapped, but he would notdesert his guns. No, indeed! 'fThen he had his wish. I never asked Jack why he wanted to- use my name, but I supposed that was the reason. I Jarvis was being led gently along, but he suspected nothing. There was a very demure expression on Miss Ferguson's face when she asked: Is Jack very popular 111 social circles? . . u Now, thought Jarvis, I become artistic. Now comes the peroration of this argu- ment. He said, Jack's popular-I might say confidentially that he's too popular to suit me 5 but he doesn't seem to care very much. I'll tell you what I think. I believe he is too fond of some girl that doesn't live near the college. .I .don't know who she IS and he never told me anything, but a fellow is entitled to an opinion. . She seemed to ponder on this bit of information, and soon it was time for our knights to leave. ' V Well, how did you succeed? Oh, about right. I - Did she believe all you told her? Such were theeindicationsf' I , . - The fact of the matter was that the lady in question had. WOVCU the begmmng of 3' very strong web around Jarvis, and he was not inclined to gossip. He wanted to think It over. . Tell us about it. 189