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Page 39 text:
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Page 41 text:
CUSTER'S LAST STAN D
Probably no other Indian in American history stands out as prominently as
Sitting Bull, chief of the Sioux. It was he who defeated and completely massacred
the troops sent against him under General Custer. It is said that no man escaped
alive, yet it does not say anything about the women. It so happens that a certain
history teacher of Southside, while hunting rare specimens of buffalo and deer, came
upon the scene just before the affray started. Here is her version of the battle.
"The troops were marching by fours in single file along the dusty concrete road
toward camp, tired and wet from the drizzling rain. Overhead the sun blazed down
upon the bright new uniforms of the men and setting off the dull brown jackets
trimmed with scalloped lace, had already begun to sink in the east. These lusty
youths with their grey hair slicked down with Slicko and their pretty yellow col-
legiate pants were indeed an inspiring sight to behold. General Custer, himself,
riding in front in his new Model A Ford and smoking a Camel, was closely followed
by Rudy Vallee, leading a men's quartet. The chorus was singing the Stein Song
to keep the men's spirits up, for they had missed the car at the last stop and had
been forced to walk two extra full length city blocks. However, these staunch
soldiers looked forward to the time when they should arrive in camp and tune in on
the nightly entertainment given by Amos and Andy.
"Suddenly, as if from nowhere at all, the men were startled by the hum of air-
plane motors. Looking up, one of them exclaimed---' 'Tis Sitting Bull and his blood-
thirsty band of Sioux aviatorsf
"He had no sooner said this than from all sides Indians, painted hideously with
Pond's facial cream, and riding Columbia bicycles, swarmed down upon them. In
front of the onrushing Indians, superbly riding in an eight-cylinder Buick and brand-
ishing a long cruel safety-razor, was none other than Sitting Bull, himself. The
Indians, dressed all in red with ties, shoes, shirts, and socks to match, and wearing
blue and White suspenders, were indeed a terrible sight to behold. Our soldiers,
seeing that their uniforms were put to shame, each and every one burst a blood vessel
and died of envy. Thus they were completely wiped out, leaving themselves to be
scalped by the victorious Indians.
U 'A good job,7 commented Sitting Bull, as he hailed a passing taxi and hastened
off to a banquet given in honor of A1 Capone."
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