Southside High School - Edsonian Yearbook (Elmira, NY)

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7 T ' C-li: Q-Qs -jf A g QQ.: D Q ' ff! f"-"- Xzxfxf 'Wa -wwf 5, 'vfmwfwey XY N' L .. 'K ,N t ,X 7 KW X' xx N' . - K ,IIC x H 4 Q3 ff solH S+B'EcHTGH s A u INNOCENTS INNOCENTS ABROAD After disembarking from the se- cureness and guidance of the mighty lines Education, the Innocents find themselves in the strange world of business. To reach their distination, the country of Success, they must travel one of the two routes lying be- fore them-namely, Work or idleness. Work presents a stony path full of the ruts of discouragements, inappre- ciation and insignificance combined with the rocks of hardships, submis- sion and weariness. Idleness presents a mistily smooth pathway strewn with the roses of ease, pleasure and con- tentment. However, at the end of the pafthway of work is success, but at the end of the pathway of idleness is ob- scurity. Which road will the Innocents take? Mariofz Mclnerney INNOCENT AMBITIONS 1. To be able to sleep until 8 :59 and reach S. H. S. by 9:00 a. m. 2. To persuade the teacher to give a HD" for a five week's work deserv- ing-F 3. To train the ears so that, while enjoying an innocent snooze, one would hear the buzzer, wake up, and not sleep on into the next period, an innocent in a hostile atmosphere. 4. To have History C in any but the 4th or Sth period. The teacher's spon- taneous speech,-caused by the bell,- would end much sooner. 5. And the greatest of all: to be popular with teachers and classmates alike, without becoming studious, the teachers, because it is necessary, the classmates, because, well, you know ABROAD DANGERS OF INNOCENTS ABROAD As sure as the fates have kept watch over them while they are in Southside, woe will befall certain members of the senior class when they depart from their beloved Alma Mater. Someone in the near future is go- ing to take advantage of Ruth Carr's willingness to loan all her possessions, and of John Deming's willingness to work. Time will take away such in- nocence. just because we're honest in South- side is not a sign that the world isg and if someone should steal poor un- suspecting Jim McConnell's gum, he would be broken-hearted. Miriam Parker needs watching, too. She will meet her death ,neath the wheels of a Lizzie during one of her giggling spells. As for Claude Gingrich-the inno- cent child won't know Hwhat it's all aboutl' when he first attracts feminine attention. We appeal to all good Southsiclers -is there no way we can protect these innocent seniors when they are out from Linder our guidance? Roberta Tetor WHY INNOCENTS LEAVE SCHOOL 1. Only six hours of school a day. 2. Too much time between classes. 3. Classes only forty minutes long. 4. Too much time at noon. ips only natura .K 5. Not half ,ent gh night work. J lip Zph Tolberi retta McConnell X Page Thirty-Eight X 'T Wy J "' -- ,, -.1--a ...gf-. 7 " an w i-A fri: .. .. f E 1 4 ' ' -1,A5!!Qaaaiaia -'01i,mi3.ffe--- f if get as we aees

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X-5" ic Jug K xii . XXZ-,.-. Wi fl.-'Q 'fix gr, pf ,T Cf- w-.-xg Y . 1 gl A Q' X t- -,X e N gh L- -s-od XSCHUONI:-AXN'NrUAi7 Jr' - AUTOBIGC-RAPHY OF AN INNOCENT I was born in Saint Louis and have spent a little of my Life on the Missis- sippi. Like the Man Who Corrupted Hadleyburg, I have done much Roughing It, and have acquired broad views as a Tramp Abroad. VVhile traveling, I be- came acquainted with More Tramps Abroad, who were also Following the Equa- tor. Among them were the Prince and the Pauper, Those Extraordinary Twins who were responsible for the Tragedy of Puddinhead Wilson. A few weeks later, we were informed by Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn, two other Innocents Abroad, that Eoe's Diary revealed I had been left a 330,000 Bequest and a 561,000,000 Bank Note by Cap'n Stormfield. They also stated that there was an American Claimant, a Connecticut Yankee, to be exact. Being a believer in Christian Science, and scenting what promised to be a Double-Barreled Detective Story, I sent Tom Sawyer Abroad to get the Personal Recollections of Joan d'Arc. However, my Double-Barreled Detective Story proved to be only a Dog's Tale. foan d'Arc had met The Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court during Cap'n Stormjieldis Visit to Heaven, and he had cap- tured her heart by training the Jumping Frog of Calaveras County. She also said that he had participated in the theft of the Stolen White Elephant. Of course the Connecticut Yankee had no chance of obtaining the money when faced with this evidence in the court of Hadleyburg, and I won my inheri- tance. Now I and my other Tramps are living in a Gilded Age. X 5 ,Tx Mm ,Wy . .x . , .i 'lil mil IXXK... :ix I My Page Thirty-Seven if ' Alf M 'J .,EQ.H--L.h5,Ir9 X ffgfffri .E:.,',':'.. ., .. tie- c..gj,.-g- feces ef E ---2 -E--fer?

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