South High School - Southernaire Yearbook (Cleveland, OH)

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Futuristic Reunion In the main gym, Aurelia Formanek led the group in a brisk work-out. And for those who were interested in advancing their education, Carolyn Red Hot Tomollee Schmidt ond Doris Tangertne Kubes were holding a doss in advanced calculus in the lecture room. Our chief chemists, Ann HCI Hnanicek and Barbara H..SO ' Vondrasek with their assistant laboratory technician Carol CoOH Moyse were experimenting with their new theory of interplanetary flight, which was Drink plenty of Ronald McCarthy's sodo pop made from pure gas, and you can float to the planets with the greatest of ease. Armed with a butterfly net, Shirley Vanek was ready to set out to discover whether the specimens on the moon were as whacky os those in her newly-published book, Padded Cells I Have Known. Another authoress, Irene Struzenski, who rewrote the Latin textbook, was on hand to take down the first ufterings of the moon people for her next sensational book, Everything's Greek To Me. A quick glance out of the porthole revealed the huge craters of the satellite, Luna. A rapid burst of the forward rockets pulled the ship to a thundering descent. Before stepping out, Tony Hercules Liparino checked the otmosphere for radioactivity, or harmful rays. Seeing everything was ship-shape, Jim Butvin opened the air-locks, using all his masculine muscles, and the would-be adventurers led by Dolores BB Cvitkovich descended the ladder. As they stepped out, Janet Poles almost broke her legs to get to the Coca Cola stand that she alone spotted. She stumbled to the counter and took a big chunk of ice, 30 lbs. to tell the truth, which she immediately swallowed because the air around was a hot 212 degrees. When Franklin Koberna looked up he sow Richard Korfant floating around. It seems he forgot to put on his lead slippers A few of the biologists, Marjorie Kurshuk and her associates George Horchick and Don Zgrabik started looking for a substitute for Carter's Little Liver Pills. Jim Bowers, the aeronautical engineer, was testing the wind velocity to see if conditions were right for his newest creation, a rocket powered by the disintegration of Alka Seltzer ond water. Carol Kvet had a hard time keeping her eye on her large brood. 19 strong, which kept floating away in different directions. Already hunting specimens for his trophy room, John Ober, noted huntsman, unlimbered his hydrogen-powered gun. The first thought that entered Rosemarie Brich's mind as she stepped out of the hatchway was Here I may find my dream man. Amid all the shouting Eugene Malinowski's voice could scarcely be heard, calling for a ping-pong partner. With her husband trudging behind carry- ing her violin and French horn, Diane Eustes came trotting down the runway. Sitting quietly before their easels, Ed Seink and Pot Potucek were pointing, the first artists to capture a Lunar Sunset. Joan Herholtz, who didn't fee! too good after the rough landing, was escorted to the dispensary by masculine Milton Hintz. An ospirin and some cold compresses applied by head nurse Pat LoPinfo eased her wobbliness. One look out of the window reveoled William Swansinger trying to do some roadwork but bouncing to a height of 15 feet in the air with each stride. More than one person needed Bromo Seltzers after watching that incident take place. Frank Cerralvo, head scout of the exploring party, come zipping back on his motorbike to report that he had spotted some things about a mile away from the rocket. Hurriedly gathering up some equipment, a few of the party set out to meet these weird people. Berme Pudlin, Ann Bodnar, and a few others fainted outright upon seeing these things, for the lunar creofures were more fins and tail than anything else. Mary Ann Draganic had but one thing to say, Bet they can swim good! Helen Svanda, that great interpreter who knows 92 different languages (some of her own creation), tried to strike up a conversation, but got only a few eeps and urps in reply. Pushing ond making her way through the crowd came the first president of the moon, her honor Sylvia Novak, who was followed by vice president Jane Borovicka ond her honor's personal secretary Barbara Kerr, who brags about having a Zout High diploma which she finally got in 1953. Head Lunar fashion designer, Audrey Stettin and her assistant Barbara Demcr quickly ran to one of the moon women and struck up a heated conversation about hemlines and necklines. They finally 25

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Futuristic Reunion It was a crisp morning in the year 1975 os a crowd gathered to witness one of the greatest advances of time, the first trip to the moon. The gleaming spectre of the huge rocket ship, created by those nationally recognized engineers, Don Kucewicz and Richard Herrington, was almost ready for the historic takeoff. The high military brass, composed of Admiral Betty Stibil and Lieutenant Commander Joan Dyczkowski, rode up in a Turbojeep that was chauffeured by that distinguished and successful last-class seaman, Ed Kosiewicz, who is also known for his morale boosting in calisthenics (1-2-3). Last minute goodbyes echoed through the small enclosure of South High's schoolyard, as Security Agent, dead-eye Jack Picard escorted into the rocket the crew composed of dashing Bob Conductor, pilot, his aid Casey Olenski and his radio engineer, Frank Hamski. After the crew had boarded the rocket, Frank got his ground clearance orders from Earl Kinsey in the control tower. Flash bulbs popping, Ken Korbel and Tom Bodnovich, that well-known lady killer twosome, both of Inter-Planetary News, were almost ready to zoom back to their editors, Joe Marvin and Rich Kor-fant with the photo-flashed round-ups. Good luck wishes and bon voyages were colled out by many friends. Among them was that famous tag wrestling team, featured yearly on Ullra-Gammo-Vision, Denis the Menace Vanek and Slamming Dan Izbinski. To everyone's astonishment up rode the first lady of the government, Helen Josionek in her special custom-built hydro-cruiser. A few of her close friends in her cabinet were there too. Shirley Sasalo, as Secretary of the Navy, has endorsed more items than Hopalong Cassidy. Then there's Ed Money Bags Kruszynski, Secretary of the Treasury, who now puts his X on all dollar bills. Of course the government wouldn't be complete without an ambassador to Lower Slobovia, who this year is Mary Lee Clemente. Almost at zero hour, Ann Marie Kennedy zoomed up in her Spacilloc which was chauffeured by Big Bill Gill. With a screech of burned rubber the limousine came to an abrupt half. Ann Marie hopped out and her red faced escort Gene Miller started throwing hundred dollar bills to the crowd As all members of tho June '53 class boarded the rocket, the jets were being tuned up by the head mechanic Arlene Cutie Wienold and her assistant Gerald Butch Butcher. After the final farewells, the glistening ship, with a thunderous roar, climbed straight up into the unknown. Following the initial black-out stage, of a height of 700 miles in stratosphere the passengers were allowed to sit up (if they could). George Renkel upon looking out the observation port noticed a spot circling the globe. With a pair of space-glosses, he found it to be that famous globe Irotter, Robert Hlovaty. The entrance of two charming hostesses, Morcio Jesionowski and Elaine Rabonf, drew whistles from the masculine passengers. Orders for dinner were taken, as Martha Smilanich, head cook, prepared the bicarbonate of soda. Wilbur Sheppard ordered an air-sick tablet. James Murphy ordered an atomic plate special as did Ronald Kish, his seat companion. Since Cecilia Looby was on a diet, she ordered a super dynamic aspirin, without water Midway through their meal, an announcement came over the P. A. This excursion is being made possible through the inflated pocketbooks of those zillionaires—Don Kiesel, the originotor of that zing-boom-poof breakfast cereal. Atomic Antics,- Lillian Novak, president of the world wide organization, Old Maids Mutual; and Bob Scinkovic, creator of that new sensation, the Chlorophyll treated toothpick that is guaranteed against rusting. A groan was heard after the dishes had been cleared away. A search of the cargo hold revealed a stowaway who turned out to be Lenny Szczepanski. After being questioned, he revealed his reason. He was still frying to dodge the draft Some of the passengers eagerly awaiting the landing on the moon, which was due in three space eons, were Phyllis Serio, thot shipping tycoon who hoped to establish an interplanetary freight service, and her friend Carol Slivko, famous for her creation of the new look in sausages. Gazing out the porthole, Mildred Spiroch hoped that she would be able to return to earth once more. Pepto-Bismol didn't help her. Leona Schubert wondered if she could use her vast knowledge of the German language on the moon. Sitting at the stationery desk, Joan Motwicki was filling her diory with many things that had happened that doy, using her own version of simplified shorthand. Also present was Audrey Levan with her millionaire husband. 24

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Futuristic Reunion agreed that necklines should go up and hemlines should go down. The ice was broken and people talked about this and that. It seems the language experts forgot to speak English to those people! Time wer. on and Len Storme, the man who wos graduated {?}, rang the supper bell os he gave out hot tips on the horses running at Randall. Again the group of 150 sot down to eat Ron Zakos, another artist in the crowd, rose to make a toast to announce the marriage of Louis Joklic to that long-woited-for rich widow, Josephine Googenheimer the 85th. Cheers rang out for Lois Simon, who then announced the coming of her eighth set of quadruplets in a few months. The crowd, ofter eating, finally persuaded some people to entertain them. The first ncme yelled for was Madame Bernie Fifi Skufco, who rose and blinked her false eyelashes. She strutted forth info the spotlight where she danced her specialty. Fortunately, Dashing Dan Sielatycki arrived on time to play some COOOOOLL music. His chief violinist, Don Wing, rose and poured cold water over everybody. The party was broken up os Doctor Brysacz Jekyll and Doctor Kenyon Hyde weirdly strode up to ask for a volunteer to test their new invention, the machine of the walking dead. Bravely, football coach Don Frank ordered his left half-back Joe Zumack to step forward. He obediently did as was fold, stepped forward, dropped dead, and walkod, which showed the success of the doctors on their experiment. Night fell and hit the crowd on their heads. They quickly dropped asleep. The next morning found Ron Toncar, head carpenter, building a brand new store for Don Pent-kowski to manage. Don had to have a store because o week ago he had hired Blanche Piosecki os his private secretary. Their store will be colled the Polski Piwo Parlor. After breokfast, the group gathered of Luna Stadium where they witnessed a baseball game coached by that universally recognized celebrity, Frank Butvin. That sensational basketball star Lucille Nawror stepped up to the plate and flied out to Shirley Mokry, that famous female football player, who fockled the boll in mid or. The game was interrupted as the group gazed into the sky and saw Ron Kaczmorek terrorizing the crowd with his antics in his homemade space croft. The game wos called when falling stars injured the umpire, Chester Soukup. His private secretary, LoVerne Neymon, rushed to the scene, slung him over her shoulder and zoomed to the hospital, blowing her ambulonce whistle on the way. Ronnie Schultz, physical therapist, took him undor her care, shoved him on the operating tablo and went to work! That evening the group wos thrilled to hear the music of concert pianist, Roger Havranek, who ployed the Latin version of Caesar's Funeral March on his accordion. The recitol wos interrupted as Frank Knize. olios Romeo Jiggs, scampered down the aisles chasing three more possible members for his harem. The chosen ones were 5ophie Krankowski, a bookkeeper for a bookie; Laura Lee Brooker, secretary to race-track queen Julie Mudrick; and Joan Muszynski, secretary of the Universal Latin Association. The Egizii-Lehecka Draftsman Corporation drew up plans for multi-millionaire Chuck Dolezol's new farm After its completion he held on open house to disploy the wonderful creations of Mademoiselle Pairee Hebert, who decorated the interior of the form house. As Bea Polcyn, stenographer, walked into the gold-plated barn, she was amazed to see expert mechanic Larry Larson milking the cows in their satin podded stalls. Private secretary, Josephine Constantine, couldn't enjoy the comforts of the new foam rubber love soots because she had just returned from a brisk trot. The party was broken up as bill collector, Agnes Bonk, rushed in and said that the lost payment on Francos Semproch's borgain basement mink coat was long overdue. Out of the crowd stepped head bouncer Jeanette Kunze, who escorted Frannie to the County Workhouse, which was in the engine room of the rocket. Owner Dolezol decided this was the last straw. He chosed everyone out and closed the open house. As the crowd disbursed, lashing torrents of rain beat down on the newly-built gasoline station, owned by newcomer, Dave Lawrence. Through the buckets of rain came Arfie Flynn pushing her fifty-ton car. Station attendant Pat Sullivan ran to the rescue with a can of gasoline. Away they went—WHISHHHHHH. But onward pushed General Tom Telzrow with his army of muscle-bound men, holding true to their motto Through wind, through sleet, through snow—the mail must go through and be delivered. 26