Radcliffe College - Yearbook (Cambridge, MA)

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Class Prophecy B S Class Prophecy OT very long ago I had a very strange and frightful ll experience which I am sure I shall never forget. It's ll M a pretty long story, but as it concerns every mother's daughter of you, I think I'd best be -perfectly frank ASN' and tell you all about it from beginning to end, the short and the long, the pleasant and unpleasant. The short and unpleasant part of it is that I departed from this life. I died of curiosity. The long and pleasant part of it is that I was resuscitated, revived, in brief, brought back again by satisfaction. I was rushing down Garden Street at twenty-seven minutes past nine one windy morning, when a gust of wind blew a cloud of dust in my face. As usual, my mouth was open, and I felt a square meal of dust and germs go down my throat. I was par- ticularly conscious of one particle larger than the rest that scraped and scratched as it went down and seemed to be struggling. I had been thoroughly warned against the dangers. of just such quick lunches but shortly before, so, hurrying to Margaret's sanctum, I demanded some Listerine. Of course she had it, and after a thorf ough rinse I rushed to my lecture, only a little late. V Before that lecture was over I was slowly dying of Czlriosity. I didn't know at the time 'what was happening to me, but I remem- ber now that every time I looked at any one of my classmates it seemed as though I should perish then and there if I couldn't find out what her fate would be after she graduated. By the end of the lecture I had just strength and sense enough left to crawl out of the room over to Agassiz I-Iouse and down into the rest YOO111. The next thing I remember I was staring at a perfectly blank white wall. Turning my head from side to side I discovered three other similar walls and a ceiling and a Hoor all just alike. More- 23-

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IRWIN ROOM

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Class Prophecy 1 aw-in -e ee ee as as Q over, I was seated in a glass Morris chair, the only article of fur- niture in the room, with a strong smell of carbolic permeating the place. Before I had time to get bewildered, a door opened some- where in that immaculate wall in front of me and a very strange Figure entered. He was a tiny little man with a shiny pink face and a long white beard and hair that closely resembled Johnson and Johnson's Antiseptic Absorbent Cotton. He was dressed in a sort of Greek costume of Sterilized Gauze and carried a sceptre that closely resembled a Prophylactic tooth brush. Good afternoon, he remarked affably. I got your message that you were coming and am very glad to be of any service to you I can. IVhat do you mean? I gasped, astonished. You got my message? lrVhat message? VVhy, didn't you call for help from Prince Listerine this morning, when one of our worst enemies, Curiositus, one of the high lords of the race of Germains, attacked you? We received his wireless several hours ago and have been in readiness for you ever since. 'I Oh, yes, of course, I answered, for it, seemed perfectly natural to me. And nowf' said he, you know, of course, that I am King Prophylacticus, lord of the race of Antisepticans. I will summon 1ny most experienced physician, Dr. Satisfactionis, and let him treat your case. So saying he bowed himself out of the room. Almost immediately he was replaced by a still smaller man, clad in a similar costume, only carrying instead of a sceptre a large bottle labeled Gratification. King Propzhylacticus tells me you died of Curiosity a short time ago, he said, as if wishing me a 'K Pleasant Day. 'I If you will be perfectly honest with me and tell me quite frankly about what your attack of curiosity centered, I will endeavor to send you back to the Land of the Living. f' Well, then, I cried, for Heaven's sake, tell me the futures of my beloved classmates. 24