Quincy High School - Goldenrod Yearbook (Quincy, MA)

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8 THE GOLDEN-ROD ANSWERS TO CORRESPONDENTS Due to the limited space we are unable to answer all letters received but others will be published when space permits. D. Arne—For mending the air which was rent with shouts on your husband’s return, use either a sailor’s yarn or the thread of a discourse, according to the size of the rent. 0. K. K.—We know of nothing that will mend jokes cracked in after- dinner speech. Usually they are so old as to be beyond repair. Dolly—We referred your letter to the Motherhood Dept., who said that a monkey-wrench would be the most suitable Christmas gift for your pet ape. Beauty—Your question regarding the complexion has been re- ferred to the department “Cheek-to-cheek Talks,” which you will find on page of this number. Raindon—We are sorry on our own account as well as yours that we know of no place where they re- cover borrowed umbrellas. Amateur Actress—For the scene where you are eating fruit when the fire breaks out, you should wear burnt orange with watered ribbons and garden hose. An alarm clock should be among the stage furnishings. “Brownie” Whitehead. 31list Have Been a Penthouse “Where is your “House of the Sev- en Gables?” “O-mi-gosh! I left it in my home room.” Then there is the Sotchman who stayed at home and let his mind wander. My analyze over the ocean, My analyze over the sea, Oh, who will go over the ocean And bring back my anatomy. —Ex. No 3Vonder It Sounded Hollow Professor: “What is a vacuum?” Stude: “I have it in my head, but I can’t think of it just now.” Did you know that the corridor in the vicinity of room 213 is referred to by the traffic squad as “Thomp- son’s Corner?” Mr. Lyon (discussing solutions in cliem.): “Never mind ‘supersaturat- ed’ now; let’s get ‘saturated.’” Voice: “Do you mean soused?” Do you like codfish balls? I don’t know; I never attended one. —Ex. Pete: “Mister, will you please hold my books?” Principal: “Son, do you know that I am the principal of this school?” Pete: “Oh, that is all right; you look honest enough.” Senior (to soph, scratching his head): “Do you still get a kick play- ing with wooden blocks? Soph.: “Why, of course not.” Senior: “Then leave your head alone.” Buried here Lies Eddie Lakes— Going sixty Forgot the brakes. Herbert Morris Miss Tuthill: “What is the mean- ing of ‘Posthumus’ on a musical composition?” Bright student: “Written after death.” When all the beasts are gathered in, And Peter shuts the gate, At heaven’s door, as here in school Will seniors come in late? “Now we will hear a little silence.”

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THE GOLDEN-ROD 9 Perhaps He’s Right Miss Crocket (talking of the prize the G. R. won in the national con- test) : “Besides being classified as to the type of school, the magazines were also classified as to the number of inhabitants.” Voice from rear: “You don’t mean inhabitants, you mean inmates.” John M.: “I can’t run the hundred today, coach.” Mr. Wilson: “Dash it!” The Hall Is a Good Example What are you taking up in school? Everything that isn’t nailed down.” A school teacher (helping a little soph to fasten his coat): “Did your mother hook this coat for you?” “No,” was the indignant reply. “She bought it.” “Marblehead” Paul (in English class): “Hey, Miss Raycroft, you know that last sentence we just corrected? Well, I think . . .” Frank (interrupting): “With what?” EPITAPH ON A SOPH’S GRAVE Here lies a poor and lowly soph, To him we send our praises: In English, he amused the class By using perfect phrases. In French you should have heard him. He couldn't parlez-vous,” He once (?) was bounced from study hall Because he liked to chew. He never did his homework, We’re certain that he knew The meaning of that little phrase Report at half past two.” Tom Collins Overheard in Squantum’s Own Toon- erville Trolley “Better keep your head inside the window, sonny.” Wet: “I’ll keep it out if I want to.” “Certainly,” warned the conductor, “but if you damage any of the elec- tric light poles, you’ll pay for it.” i ! til! I Why Not Write More Legibly? Teacher: “Smith, this is the third time I have seen you looking on your neighbors paper.” Smith: “Yes, sir; he writes so badly.” Teacher: “What does ‘sic transit’ mean?” Student: “An ambulance.”