Quincy High School - Goldenrod Yearbook (Quincy, MA)

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THE GOLDEN-ROD 9 Perhaps He’s Right Miss Crocket (talking of the prize the G. R. won in the national con- test) : “Besides being classified as to the type of school, the magazines were also classified as to the number of inhabitants.” Voice from rear: “You don’t mean inhabitants, you mean inmates.” John M.: “I can’t run the hundred today, coach.” Mr. Wilson: “Dash it!” The Hall Is a Good Example What are you taking up in school? Everything that isn’t nailed down.” A school teacher (helping a little soph to fasten his coat): “Did your mother hook this coat for you?” “No,” was the indignant reply. “She bought it.” “Marblehead” Paul (in English class): “Hey, Miss Raycroft, you know that last sentence we just corrected? Well, I think . . .” Frank (interrupting): “With what?” EPITAPH ON A SOPH’S GRAVE Here lies a poor and lowly soph, To him we send our praises: In English, he amused the class By using perfect phrases. In French you should have heard him. He couldn't parlez-vous,” He once (?) was bounced from study hall Because he liked to chew. He never did his homework, We’re certain that he knew The meaning of that little phrase Report at half past two.” Tom Collins Overheard in Squantum’s Own Toon- erville Trolley “Better keep your head inside the window, sonny.” Wet: “I’ll keep it out if I want to.” “Certainly,” warned the conductor, “but if you damage any of the elec- tric light poles, you’ll pay for it.” i ! til! I Why Not Write More Legibly? Teacher: “Smith, this is the third time I have seen you looking on your neighbors paper.” Smith: “Yes, sir; he writes so badly.” Teacher: “What does ‘sic transit’ mean?” Student: “An ambulance.”

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8 THE GOLDEN-ROD ANSWERS TO CORRESPONDENTS Due to the limited space we are unable to answer all letters received but others will be published when space permits. D. Arne—For mending the air which was rent with shouts on your husband’s return, use either a sailor’s yarn or the thread of a discourse, according to the size of the rent. 0. K. K.—We know of nothing that will mend jokes cracked in after- dinner speech. Usually they are so old as to be beyond repair. Dolly—We referred your letter to the Motherhood Dept., who said that a monkey-wrench would be the most suitable Christmas gift for your pet ape. Beauty—Your question regarding the complexion has been re- ferred to the department “Cheek-to-cheek Talks,” which you will find on page of this number. Raindon—We are sorry on our own account as well as yours that we know of no place where they re- cover borrowed umbrellas. Amateur Actress—For the scene where you are eating fruit when the fire breaks out, you should wear burnt orange with watered ribbons and garden hose. An alarm clock should be among the stage furnishings. “Brownie” Whitehead. 31list Have Been a Penthouse “Where is your “House of the Sev- en Gables?” “O-mi-gosh! I left it in my home room.” Then there is the Sotchman who stayed at home and let his mind wander. My analyze over the ocean, My analyze over the sea, Oh, who will go over the ocean And bring back my anatomy. —Ex. No 3Vonder It Sounded Hollow Professor: “What is a vacuum?” Stude: “I have it in my head, but I can’t think of it just now.” Did you know that the corridor in the vicinity of room 213 is referred to by the traffic squad as “Thomp- son’s Corner?” Mr. Lyon (discussing solutions in cliem.): “Never mind ‘supersaturat- ed’ now; let’s get ‘saturated.’” Voice: “Do you mean soused?” Do you like codfish balls? I don’t know; I never attended one. —Ex. Pete: “Mister, will you please hold my books?” Principal: “Son, do you know that I am the principal of this school?” Pete: “Oh, that is all right; you look honest enough.” Senior (to soph, scratching his head): “Do you still get a kick play- ing with wooden blocks? Soph.: “Why, of course not.” Senior: “Then leave your head alone.” Buried here Lies Eddie Lakes— Going sixty Forgot the brakes. Herbert Morris Miss Tuthill: “What is the mean- ing of ‘Posthumus’ on a musical composition?” Bright student: “Written after death.” When all the beasts are gathered in, And Peter shuts the gate, At heaven’s door, as here in school Will seniors come in late? “Now we will hear a little silence.”

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10 THE GOLDEN-ROD Look what John W. Wilson orig- inated. Either The Editor pumped him too hard or he is in love. “Battleship Kate”: “You Done Me Dirt,” “You Rascal You,” “You Told Me That You Loved Me,” “But You Told Him, Too.” “You Used to Be” “My Every- thing,” but now “What Do I Care for You,” because “When I’m With You I’m Lonesome.” “When We Are Alone” “Together” “I Get Those Weary Blues.” “I Suppose I Was Mistaken in You.” You had “Me” “Kneeling at Your Altar of Love,” but now “It’s Over” “You Made Me Cry.” “Was That the Human Thing to Do?” Yours was a “Come Easy, Go Easy Love.” “Remember” “Life Is Just a Bowl of Cherries,” “Even Though” “The Thrill Is Gone.” “Disappointed,” “Little Joe.” The answer to this amazing piece of work will be published in the next issue. Watch for it. Mr. Bridges to Francis Lindberg: “Be quiet or there will be another Lindberg baby missing.” Why doesn’t the Discus Thrower heave the darned thing and get it over with? He: “Do you believe in prepared- ness?” She: “I wouldn’t mind being in arms.” There was a young fellow named Reed Who drove a big car at top speed. But a car came one day Prom the opposite way— Now the angels will have to take heed. Robert Jordan Heard at the Senior Reception “What a surprise to see you in a tux. Did you rent it?” “No, but every time I stooped over T thought it would.” The caterpillar crawls around on his stomach, but the bedbug ain’t so particular. The following are some hitherto unknown facts on the World War: Germany was given fifteen days to excavate all the land on the left bank of the Rhine. The airplane enabled the Germans to boom Tours. There was a boy named Pete Who took great care of his feet. But when at a dance He was taking a chance And they bounced him out in the street. It was not an act of chivalry Xor yet the fear of scorn; He offered her his street car seat To keep her off his corn. D. McLaughlin Here is proof that even the teach- ers make mistakes. Recently Miss Goudey wrote on a note “Bully hoo,” meaning of course------------. We think it is about time that somebody answered the appeal of the Indian. Walkovers make good shoes; ba- nanas good slippers. PICKEREL FISHING Brownie Whitehead I wade along the pond's calm shore. And cast into its mystic depth. With all its unforgotten lore. And wait with baited hook and breath. I play just where the pickerel lurk My pole with hook and line so free: Splash! A tug! I give one jerk, And lo. my fish is in a tree. The study of chlorine gas is strangulating, as well as interesting. Ask any chem student. Teacher: “Where is Cologne?” Pupil: “In the bottle.”