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Page 47 text:
Christo Pack-eCurtis, are we friends?
Curtis Covey-Yes, friends to the end.
Christo-Well, how about lending me
Curtis-That is the end.
"Are you Hungary?"
"Then Russia to the table and I'll Fiji."
"All right, Sweden my coffee and Den-
mark my bill."
Sk lk Ik
A hundred years ago or more,
When this was a wilderness drear,
A man with powder in his gun
Went out to hunt a deer.
But now, alas, I have to say,
We have a different plan:
The dear with powder on her face
Goes out to hunt the man.
"William," said Mr. Ford in Civics
class, to drive home the lesson which was
on charity and kindness, "if I saw a man
beating a donkey and stopped him from
doing so, what virtue would I be showing?"
"Brotherly love," said William.
'll lk if
She was so dumb she thought noodle
soup was a kind of shampoo.
lk if if '
Stranger-We came for the dyer's con-
Beulah Harrell-Oh, yes, where are you
if if ik
Landlady-A professor formerly oc-
cupied this room, Miss. He invented an
Miss DuValwAhl I suppose those
spots on the ceiling are the explosive.
Landlady-No, they're the professor.
Mother-What did your father say
when you smashed the new car?
Chester Palmer-Shall I leave out the
Mother-Yes, of course.
Chester-He didn't say a word.
Panhandler-Say, buddy, could you
spare a buck for coffee?
Frank Amburn--A dollar for coffee?
Panhandler-just tell me yes or no-
but don't try to tell me how to run my
Mrs. Hall-Now, Annie Muire, wliat's
the meaning of this poem?
Annie M.-It's too late, Mrs. Hall.
Mrs. Hall-NVhat do you mean, too late?
Annie-Browning is dead, and no one
Wintry winds whined weirdlyg
Willie wriggled while Winnie wheezed
Wlisdom Whispers, winter winds work
Visitor-Milton is making good pro-
gress with his violin. He is beginning to
play quite nicely.
Mr. Brockmeyer-Do you really think
so? We were afraid we'd merely gotten
used to it.
"If this is chicken," complained the
diner-out, "I'm a fool."
"Quite right, sir," said the waiter ami-
ably, "It is chicken."
"Eliza," said a friend of the family to
the old colored wasliwoman, "have you
seen Miss Edith's finance?"
"No, ma'am. It ain't been in the wash
if W if
Miss Croswhite-Now, Walter, can you
tell me what the Hedjaz is?
Walter Carper-l'm not quite sure, but
I think it means Paul Wlhiteman leading
Norman Rauhof-George VVashington
must have had a wonderful memory.
Miss Dalton-Why so, Norman?
Norman-'Cause most everywhere you
go you see a monument erected to his
Page 46 text:
Stephen Ham-May I call on you this
Mick Bane-Ycsg but don't forget that
father turns olt the lights at 10 o'clock
Stephen-That's kind of you. I'll be
there right after 10.
Anne Vilallace-I have an idea for a film
play. I believe that it will make a great
hit. Nothing of the sort has ever been
put on the screen.
Margaret Farmer-Vifhat is it?
Anne--The husband and wife in the plot
have no trouble whatever.
There was an old man from Nantucket,
VVho kept all his cash in a bucket:
But his daughter named Nan
Ran away with a man,
And as for the bucket, Nan "tuck it."
But he followed the pair to Pawtucket,
And the man and the girl with the bucket:
He said to the man, "You're welcome to
But as for the bucket, Paw "tuck it."
3' if if
Miss BlairfThey say that Dame For-
tune knocks on every n1an's door at least
Paul Davis-VVell, I had a knock but
it turned out to be her daughter Miss For-
tune : X
Sherman Hall-Darling, do you think
you could manage to live on twenty a
Frances Cummings-Yes, a week-but
not much longer.
Miss Pugh-Who can tell me who Mars
Nellie Carrico-I know I can answer
that one. He was secretary of war in
Miss Dyer-Wlhat is a polygon?
DuVal Seagle-A parrot that has es-
if 4: Sli
The secret of polite conversation, from
what we've observed, is never to open
your mouth unless you have nothing to
ik Ik IOS
Harry-Wlho spilled mustard on this
Mrs. Hall-Oh, Harry! How could
youg this is lemon pie.
Thornton Tice-Do you remember
when we met in the revolving door?
Doris james-Goodness, yes. That was
when we started going around together
if lk Ik
lim Haileyfliello: rolling your own
Robert GPH1IH9llmYB3h, the doctor
said I ought to get more exercise.
Hazel Davis-How tall is that native
Mildred Brockmeyer-Oh, about six
feet two in his stalking feet.
Aulden Lemons-The way that leading
man played last night set me to thinking.
Nevelyn Spangler-Ah! The Miracle
ik if 41
We had to Fire
Our housemaid Nang
She treated our china
Kathleen Hurd-I don't see how foot-
ball players ever get clean.
Nancy Bushong4Silly, what do you
suppose the scrub teams are for?
Page 48 text:
Miss Croswhite-And what lessons do
we learn from the busy bee?
Ruth Bocock-Not to get stung.
Christine White-I thought that you
Curtis Covey-Of course not, why?
Christine-I heard someone speak well
of you this morning.
"Fuzz" I-Iall-Is Bruno a good watch
Bill Matheney-ls he? lfVhy, our house
was robbed three times and Bruno watched
Brown Cox Qin Miss Dalton's physics
classj-But how did we stay on the earth
before the law of gravity was passed?
joe Harman-Let's do the elevator
Helen Boothe-VVhat's that?
Joe-Over in the corner with no steps.
Paper Boy-Extra! Extra! All about
the big swindle. 365 people swindled.
Mr. Ecknian-I'll take a paper. Vlfell
the little scamp: there nothing in here
about a swinclle.
Paper Boy-Cgoing on down the streetl
Extra! 366 swinclled.
Miss Pugh-VVhat is the President's
David Ratcliff-That's when the Presi'
dent puts the bill in his pocket and forgets
Miss Pugh-Do you think Washington
could have pitched a clollar across the
Rappahannock River, as he is said to have
Mary Ellen XVilliams-I don't know.
But it says in our history book that VVash-
ington pitched his camp across the Dela-
aware when the British were pursuing him.
Roy Duncan-Wihat would you advise
me to do now that I've finished school?
Mr. Eckman-Pick up a newspaper and
read the want ads.
Lady-I want a wart remover.
Hardware Clerk-But, lady, I'rn not a
Lady-I know it. I want to buy a
if if ik
Dentist-XVhich one do you want ex-
Pullman Porter-Lower seven.
lk ll' FIC
Salesman-Here's a nice card. lt says,
Christmas greetings to the only boy I ever
Kate Robinson-Fine, give me six of
Evangeline Eastman-VVhat is your
Catherine Cecil-It always has been my
bank book-but even that is lacking in
Sli if if
Aulden Lemons-I went to sleep and
dreamed that I died.
Bill Matheney-And the heat woke you
Edythe Martindwhat is the difference
between cabbage and a lemon?
Frances Coleman-I don't know.
Edythe-You'd be a line one to send
Sli lk ik
Teacher Ctalking over phonel-You say
Stuart is ill and will not be at school? Who
is this, please.?
Voice over phone-This is my father.
Nancy Bushong-I wish my name was
Nancy-Have you never heard of Tur-
key in Asia?
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