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Page 127 text:
Margaret Rauhof When are potatoes used for mending clothes? Bertha Lee Spraker — What a silly question; how should I know? Margaret — Uh! When they are put in patches. Mrs. Board — Mary, you may take Fido out and give him some air. Mary Board — Yes ma’m, and please ma’m, where will I find the filling station? Mr. Walker (in Geometry class, after watching Hal Painter and Virginia Coleman play hands for a while) Ain ' t love grand? (Still the engrossed couple did not pay attention.) Mr. Walker — -Hal, when I was going to school I used to like to play hands with the girls, too. Russell Williams (on a Pullman car) — George, I am a very heavy sleeper and l would like to get up early; would you mind calling me early? George Sho’, boss, we’se got a special system fo’ dat. See dis little button here? Well dat’s for service; when you wants to be waked you press on dis button and I comes and calls you. Biz Cox How far is it from Pulaski to Wvtheville? Otis M. — Twenty-six miles. Biz — How far is it from Wvtheville to Pulaski? Otis — Twenty-six miles, of course. Biz — Well, don’t be so sure of yourself. It’s only one week from Christmas to New Year but it’s a whole year between New Year and Christ- mas. Jim Joe Crockett— -Phew, it’s awful hot for spring. Jo Board — -You ought to be thankful it is no worse. Suppose we were in Arkansas. Wouldn’t that be awful! Jim Joe — Arkansas. Why? Jo — You better study your georgraphy lesson. The geography says Arkansas is famous for its hot springs. “See who is on the phone, ” said the boss to the office boy. “Some one who wants dearest,” the youngster shouted. (Bud Neilv, Bob Crabtree, Beauregard Richardson, Jack Bones, Robert King, and Frank Elkins got up absently and moved toward the telephone.) Mrs. Whitaker — Frederick, I heard that instead of going to Sunday school you played ball. Frederick — That ain’t true, and I got a string of fish to prove it. 121
Page 126 text:
Dorothy Wallner (in Math class) — I am awful sleepy, Mr. Walker. May I go to sleep? Mr. Walker — Yes, if you won’t make any noise. Mrs. Hall — Doctor, my husband talks in his sleep. What can I do to help him? Doctor — Try letting him talk a little in the day time. Jim Joe — You should see the new altar in our church. Margaret Rauhof — -Lead me to it. Dorothy N. — So you and Ralph Bocock are to be married. I thought it was a mere flirtation. Judith K. — So did Ralph. Mistress (to maid) — Dorothy, did you sweep behind that door? Dorothy Neighbours — Yes, mum, I sweeps everything behind that door. The rolling pin contest was won by Mrs. Harry H. Hall, who threw the rolling pin 67 feet. Mr. Hall won the 100 yard dash for married men. Joe Dink W. — How did Mr. Dismuke die? Jim Joe C. — He kicked a mule. Dink — Kicked a mule! Jim Joe — Yes, and the mule returned the compliment. Mrs. Byrd — How is it, sir, that I find you kissing my niece, Dorothy? How is it, sir? Fred Whitaker — Great! Great! Miss Dalton (in Science class) — If we breathe oxygen in the day what do we breathe at night? Stephen Ham — Nitrogen. Miss Pugh (in fourth year History) — Of what trade are all presidents? Anna Snider — Cabinet makers. Boo Morehead — The name of what character in history would a person mention in asking the servant to put coal on the fire? Biz Cox — Oh, I dunno. Boo — Philip the Great. (Fill up the grate.) 120
Page 128 text:
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