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Page 170 text:
SUPPOSE ‘CIRCUS DAY” Charlotte was a “plank " insteak of a Hoard. Nell was a “pans” instead of Howies. Jean was a “looks” instead of a Hunt. Virginia was a ‘coal " instead of a Wood. George was “mud " instead of Sand — s. Donald was a “meadow” instead of a Field — s. Eleanor was a “stew “ instead of a Frve. Sam was a “cowslip” instead of a Haislip. Dorothy was a “seamstress ' instead of a Taylor; Beth was a “dale” instead of a Glenn. Evelyn was a “room " instead of a Hall. Ralph was a “sparrow” instead of a Martin. Wilma was a “nut” instead of a Berry. Evelyn was a “hetnmer” instead of a Tucker. Hal was a “draftsman” instead of a Painter. Frances was “check” instead of Cash. Robert was a “queen " instead of a King. Charlie was a “cook” instead of a Porter. Nancy was a “houseweil” instead f a Barnwell. Lucille was “horsepower” instead of Mumpower. Ernest was a “bear " instead of a Lyon — s. Isaac was a “runner " instead of a Walker. Doc was a “cleanei " instead of a Dyer. K -therine was a “wideawake” instead of a Knapp. Calvin was an “ambulance” instead of a Hurst. Ellen was a “gooseberry " instead of a Quesenbc rry. Auldcn was an “orange” instead of a Lemon — s. Beatrice was an “allidaughter " instead of an Alli- son. All Freshmen were “mice” instead of Rats. OUR FACULTY OF P. H. S. Our teachers are the queerest things; They fuss at us all day — It’s sit down here, and don’t do that. And put that gum away. Miss Peters, she gets awful mad If we’re a minute late. To look at her you wouldn’t think That she’s just thirty-eight! Mrs. Hall sure makes us step around; We do just as she wishes. Gee! I pity poor Mr. Hall And all those breakfast dishes. “Shuff” takes his lizzie out ridin’; He’s nice, he doesn’t play poker. But if his lizzie stops on him He’ll get right out and choker. Miss Pugh is just a baby doll. And my! She is good lookin’; But I’d rather die from starvation Than to eat that teacher’s cookin’! You’d think Miss Dalton’s an old fashioned girl, With all those curly locks divine, But just once count the beaus she’s got And you will change your mind. Miss Rosenblatt’s an “expert typist,” She teaches bookkeeping in the room above; I hear around that she’s engaged, I wonder if she dreams of love? Miss Blair deserves a medal. For she gave up all her joys. She undoubtedly has the patience of Job. Why must she contend with those Junior boys! Miss Croswhite teaches Biology And gives dermits, tho she hates to — She told us all about jumping frogs, She said one time she killed two. I’d like to tell about Mr. Eckraan And the girls that ride in his car, But I guess I ' ll have to stop right here — I think I’ve gone too far. On tlu- seventeenth day of April “Sparks” Circus came here. ' Twas like a day in December — Cold enough for the polar bear. We all gathered on the streets To see the big parade. It was too cold for ice cream rones And the colored lemonade. But just the same old Mr. North Wind, With all his windy frowns, Could not keep us away From the Circus grounds. We had to see the side show And all the elephants too — In fact, most every “freak of nature” That could be found in a zoo. Chief Carper had a busy day With his assistant Pierce. Along with policemen Sands and Boothe These four looked awfully fierce. They kept good order in the town, No elephants got away, But all of us were mad to think We couldn’t have a Ci rcus every day. “THE ORIOLE” book that is precious as gold ; Its leaves of silver we turn; We harken to long ago memories That never will return. We see our school mates’ pictures. Our glorious football team. And in our rage we turn each page Of this book that is a dream. We sec our basketball girls; For them we used to cheer. I often scream, right in a dream. Awakened, surprised no one is here. There’s comfort in this little book If you will only read. To think of some Bill. John, and George — Oh! they were friends indeed. Each mind is filled with wordly things — A future goal is set; An Oriole for our monuments, Our school days we’ll never forget. HALLOWE’EN A pumpkin on most every gate And ghosts just everywhere; The air was filled with witches; The passers by they’d scare. The clock struck twelve and all was quiet, But some mischievous boys Were still awake to carry out plans And not to play with toys. For fear somebody wouldn’t fall On the street they put bananas, And what do you think they did at school? — Put chickens in the pianos. But this wasn’t halt of it, my friend, You’d think I’m just a fool If I would tell you the honest truth — They locked a cow right in our school. They tore down everything they saw And took off wagon wheels; They stole valve caps and let out air From a hundred automobiles. People thought a cyclone had hit the town Or some enormous charger. But one thing we know tor sure — Next year the police will be larger. 164
Page 169 text:
WHAT A DISAPPOINTMENT The other day as I was passing by I heard Miss Rosenblatt give an awful sigh. “Oh! come, look isn’t it sweet, Betsy, come look, it’s just across the street.” I went, expecting something great, And guess what I saw? A little bulldog standing by the gate. MR. ECKMAN’S DOG TALE Some people delight in telling tales — At least this is the rule; But you haven’t heard Mr. Eckman’s tale Of a dog which came to school. He looked very queer as he came in, 1 wondered what he was seeing; He raised his paw as if to shake Just like a human being. “Good morning” he said in dog Latin, Which is a long bow! wow! And then he began to wiggle his tail. He knew he was welcome now. Next morning he came as usual, But brought a friend with him. He bowed and in his language said, “Mr. Eckman, meet brother Jim.” “Gentlemen, take your seats,” said Mr. Eckman, “I sure do like your looks; But if you wish to attend this school, You must go to Darst and get your books.” FRESHMEN RESPONSE TO SENIORS Oh, Seniors, how do you feel we say. When you leave this school no longer to play? Your baby days are over, dears; Put away childish laughter and tears. You go around the halls with a stuck-up nose, But we know that this is only a pose. But you are sorry — don’t say no — Because from these portals you soon must go. You’re going to college, you ok. high-hats, We wish you the worst when you are rats! Oh, how you tortured us, oh, oh. my! You paid no heed to our mercy cry. Goodbye Seniors, but not for aye, You’ll come back for a visit some day. GRANDPA SHUFF AND HIS FRIEND MISS BLAIR Grandpa Shuff and his friend Miss Blair Decided one day to visit the fair. They got in his Ford and rattled along; Shuff was so happy he sang a song. “Wiggs” was so ti. rilled that she hugged his ear, . vnd it frightened him so that he stripped Ins gear. At last they arrived in the Ford that creaked. And went in the tent where the animals squeaked. Horses, cattle, donkeys and pigs. All were yelling, “Hello there, Wiggs.” They neighed, they squawk? j, they brayed, they quacked. Until old Shuff s .id, “Let’s go back.” They bought souvenirs before they went — “Wiggs ' bought till Shuff had not a cent. Then back 10 th Ford they tripped with glee. “What a good time we had,” said Wiggs. “Oui. Oui.” When they reached home, they were weary and sore; “Wiggs” was so tired she couldn ' t get to the door, So Shuff picked her up and carried her there- — Oh! You Grandpa Shuff and vour friend Miss Blair! MISS DMTON S FORD Miss Dalton’s old Ford as it sits on the hill Doesn’t look as though it could give you a thrill. But into it you get, and with a little work A ip. a whiz, and you’re off with a jerk. Down the hill with an outrageous speed The old Ford comes like a great fiery steed. Around the corner with a rickety split; Now what will she do, it’s beginning to spit? She reaches for the choker, but all in vain, And then looks around as if it gives her a pain. Wi.en it starts up the hill with a chug, chug, chug. She wishes for someone to give her a tug. Although the old Ford sometimes balks, I hardly think Miss Dalton ever walks. And now before ending this ridiculous rhyme 1 must say the Ford is faithful and usually on time. SHUFF’S SUPPORTER Miss Blair is a supporter of “Shuffv’s” team; .She thinks he is a coach who is awfully “mean” For the football games she would “fall;” She didn’t seem able to stand up at all At the Pulaski-Christiansburg game. (It wasn’t by any means one that was tame.) Boys and girls were running this way and that, A couple of them knocked Miss Blair flat. All of us began to “roar;” She gave us “the blush” that we all adore. BEDTIME TALE The following page was torn from the diary of a student of P. H. S. who writes her diary in a pe- culiar form — that of short, short sentences, to the point : December 23, 1928. Last day of school before Christmas. Whoopee! Bad as Hallowe’en (and other expressions of Christ- mas) . Fireworks — Dements! (Just the type.) Some of the Senioi boys got funny and sent the girls peculiar apparel — no refreshments were enjoyed by all. Big tree (beautiful). Lots of visitors (of importance). Lots of presents extended by most. “Poor Nuts’ were given their parts as a reminder of their every day actions! HOW FUNNY We were practicing basketball. All of us were there, large and small. I heard the laughing and chatter And turned to see what was the matter. There stood Dorothy Taylor in a group, Her face was the color of tomato soup. As I glanced a little lower 1 saw something on the floor. “Dot” was lacking something from waist on down; We don’t wonder that it’s known all over town. TOM Who is he, we all want to know? What’s he supposed to do; is he fast or »s he slow? He is the janitor of Pulaski Hi, And lie thinks he’s It with a capital I. Tom is black, black as night — A rather old and peculiar sight. A wat h in his pocket, a chain twice as big. Helps to make up his familiar old rig. Every morning he’s at the door at nine, Yelling, “Come on, boys, or you won’t be on time.” He’s supposed to sweep every single room. But as far as I can see he never moves a broom. He isn’t very fast, lie’s inclined to be slow. But just the same, he gets his dough. Still he’s our janitor, and we’d be satisfied, If he’d only keep the “Senior Room” hot enough inside. 163
Page 171 text:
ECK MAN’S CIRCUS TIIE POOR NUT Three weeks of strenuous practice- - Not even time to sneeze; Miss Vaughn went almost insane From worrying about her keys. The famous Draper and Dalton performers Would pull their fancy tricks; Before the cast arrived each night They’d dance like lunatics. “My ego is turned outward; Nobody’s gonna boss me.” ' The Poor Nut” then spilt “noodle soup” And the audience laughed in glee. With Rosenblatt director It was a fine class play; “Doc” Harman helped to put it over big, Like he saw it on Broadway. “The Poor Nut” sure did play his part — Harold Beamer was a great asset. The local paper got all confused And a “write up” we didn’t get. The crowd all wanted to see it again; Of all school plays it was the best. So on the twenty-second of March We staged it again upon request. Again it took them all by storm When “The Poor Nut” got the silver cup. The Southwest Times then awoke And gave P. H. S. a double write up. At first it was staged at the Dalton And then at the Jefferson School; The people of Pulaski know a good play — The public you cannot fool. ( )h, yes. we had a circus J ust a small one of our own. We named it after Eckman. And put him on the throne. We took the parade down Main Street To advertise, you know. And the auditorium was packed that day To see the “Original Eckman Show.” He showed us all his teachers From Hall way down to Green; They were the funniest creatures That we had ever seen. As they were rolled upon the stage They’d laugh and sing and talk, J ust like the rest of human beings That eat and sleep and walk. We even had a ten piece band Along with the thirty freaks; The only thing that was incomplete We couldn’t hear circus wagon screaks. 165
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