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Page 168 text:
Palmer K — Have I the pleasant expression you desire? Photographer — Perfectly, sir. Palmer — Then shoot quick; i f hurts my face. Garnett K — Lucille, wanna fly? Lucille Richardson — Oooo, yess Garnett K — Wait a minute and I ' ll catch you one. Palmer K — Aren’t you crazy about bathing beauties? “Shorty” Draper — Don’t know, I never bathed one Harold — “Hefty” Kinzer called me a liar, and bigas he is I knocked him sprawling in the street. Nell Bowles — What with, your bare fist? Harold — Naw, with my automobile. Mr.Shuff — Did your father help you with this problem? Duane — No, I got it wrong myself! Miss Pugh — And just think! One of you may be presi- dent some day. All of you who would like to be president, please rise. (All arise except Miller B.) “Well, Miller, what’s the matter? Wouldn’t you like to be president? Miller B — Yes’m, but I can’t. Miss Pugh — Why not? Miller B. — Because I’m a Democrat. Mr. Slniff — Pi R square. Wilbur Lewev — Pies are round. Miss Peters — Mozelle seems to be very fond of music, doesn’t she? Virginia Wood — Yes, you will always find her at the piano when her mother is washing dishes. Lucille R — Harold, wh don’t you get a haircut? Harold (using economy) — Oh, I find it cheaper to pay dog license; you don’t have to pay it but once a year. Miss Rosenblatt — Here, he re, what are you fellows fighting about? Garnett Browder — He just said I didn’t have any brains. Miss Rosenblatt — Don’t let a little thing like that break up your friendship. Mr. Eckman (in speaking to some patron of the school) — What course is your son studying now? Patron — Just the plain epidemic course. 162
Page 167 text:
Miss Dalton — Do von think the radio has increased the music lovers? Miller Bushong — Yes’m, I read where a couple had been married over the radio yesterday. Billie Harman — What kind of so.: does Herbert Hoover wear? “Bee” Kinzer — I don’t know. Billie Harman — Well, you should. You were one of his supporters. Charles — Why didn’t you answer my letter? Beth — Didn’t get it. Charles — Didn’t get it? Beth — No, and besides I didn’t like some of the things you said in it. Miss Dalton — Ma rzell, are you sure you understand this machine? Marzell — Of course, my dad is a mechanic. Mr. Shuff — I’m going to get married. Miss Blair — That’s fine. Going to have a bridal tour? Mr. Shuff — No, hold hei by the ears. Fire Inspector — -But where are your fire escapes? Mr. Eckman — Why, didn’t you know ' : t’s leap year? Robert Eastman — What is the best way to keep a dog from going mad in August? Julian Groseclose — Shoot him in July. Miss Pugh — Lucille, turn around. Sam Haislip — Yes, do make her turn around before she tempts me. Margaret Matheney — What are you doing now, Louis? Louis Jackson — Aerial work for circus. Margaret — Whazzat? Louis — I blow up the balloons. Lip-stick and fly-paper are very much alike; they catch careless creatures that pause to investigate. •T - •‘W J 5 FT 6 i(i 1
Page 169 text:
WHAT A DISAPPOINTMENT The other day as I was passing by I heard Miss Rosenblatt give an awful sigh. “Oh! come, look isn’t it sweet, Betsy, come look, it’s just across the street.” I went, expecting something great, And guess what I saw? A little bulldog standing by the gate. MR. ECKMAN’S DOG TALE Some people delight in telling tales — At least this is the rule; But you haven’t heard Mr. Eckman’s tale Of a dog which came to school. He looked very queer as he came in, 1 wondered what he was seeing; He raised his paw as if to shake Just like a human being. “Good morning” he said in dog Latin, Which is a long bow! wow! And then he began to wiggle his tail. He knew he was welcome now. Next morning he came as usual, But brought a friend with him. He bowed and in his language said, “Mr. Eckman, meet brother Jim.” “Gentlemen, take your seats,” said Mr. Eckman, “I sure do like your looks; But if you wish to attend this school, You must go to Darst and get your books.” FRESHMEN RESPONSE TO SENIORS Oh, Seniors, how do you feel we say. When you leave this school no longer to play? Your baby days are over, dears; Put away childish laughter and tears. You go around the halls with a stuck-up nose, But we know that this is only a pose. But you are sorry — don’t say no — Because from these portals you soon must go. You’re going to college, you ok. high-hats, We wish you the worst when you are rats! Oh, how you tortured us, oh, oh. my! You paid no heed to our mercy cry. Goodbye Seniors, but not for aye, You’ll come back for a visit some day. GRANDPA SHUFF AND HIS FRIEND MISS BLAIR Grandpa Shuff and his friend Miss Blair Decided one day to visit the fair. They got in his Ford and rattled along; Shuff was so happy he sang a song. “Wiggs” was so ti. rilled that she hugged his ear, . vnd it frightened him so that he stripped Ins gear. At last they arrived in the Ford that creaked. And went in the tent where the animals squeaked. Horses, cattle, donkeys and pigs. All were yelling, “Hello there, Wiggs.” They neighed, they squawk? j, they brayed, they quacked. Until old Shuff s .id, “Let’s go back.” They bought souvenirs before they went — “Wiggs ' bought till Shuff had not a cent. Then back 10 th Ford they tripped with glee. “What a good time we had,” said Wiggs. “Oui. Oui.” When they reached home, they were weary and sore; “Wiggs” was so tired she couldn ' t get to the door, So Shuff picked her up and carried her there- — Oh! You Grandpa Shuff and vour friend Miss Blair! MISS DMTON S FORD Miss Dalton’s old Ford as it sits on the hill Doesn’t look as though it could give you a thrill. But into it you get, and with a little work A ip. a whiz, and you’re off with a jerk. Down the hill with an outrageous speed The old Ford comes like a great fiery steed. Around the corner with a rickety split; Now what will she do, it’s beginning to spit? She reaches for the choker, but all in vain, And then looks around as if it gives her a pain. Wi.en it starts up the hill with a chug, chug, chug. She wishes for someone to give her a tug. Although the old Ford sometimes balks, I hardly think Miss Dalton ever walks. And now before ending this ridiculous rhyme 1 must say the Ford is faithful and usually on time. SHUFF’S SUPPORTER Miss Blair is a supporter of “Shuffv’s” team; .She thinks he is a coach who is awfully “mean” For the football games she would “fall;” She didn’t seem able to stand up at all At the Pulaski-Christiansburg game. (It wasn’t by any means one that was tame.) Boys and girls were running this way and that, A couple of them knocked Miss Blair flat. All of us began to “roar;” She gave us “the blush” that we all adore. BEDTIME TALE The following page was torn from the diary of a student of P. H. S. who writes her diary in a pe- culiar form — that of short, short sentences, to the point : December 23, 1928. Last day of school before Christmas. Whoopee! Bad as Hallowe’en (and other expressions of Christ- mas) . Fireworks — Dements! (Just the type.) Some of the Senioi boys got funny and sent the girls peculiar apparel — no refreshments were enjoyed by all. Big tree (beautiful). Lots of visitors (of importance). Lots of presents extended by most. “Poor Nuts’ were given their parts as a reminder of their every day actions! HOW FUNNY We were practicing basketball. All of us were there, large and small. I heard the laughing and chatter And turned to see what was the matter. There stood Dorothy Taylor in a group, Her face was the color of tomato soup. As I glanced a little lower 1 saw something on the floor. “Dot” was lacking something from waist on down; We don’t wonder that it’s known all over town. TOM Who is he, we all want to know? What’s he supposed to do; is he fast or »s he slow? He is the janitor of Pulaski Hi, And lie thinks he’s It with a capital I. Tom is black, black as night — A rather old and peculiar sight. A wat h in his pocket, a chain twice as big. Helps to make up his familiar old rig. Every morning he’s at the door at nine, Yelling, “Come on, boys, or you won’t be on time.” He’s supposed to sweep every single room. But as far as I can see he never moves a broom. He isn’t very fast, lie’s inclined to be slow. But just the same, he gets his dough. Still he’s our janitor, and we’d be satisfied, If he’d only keep the “Senior Room” hot enough inside. 163
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