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Page 103 text:
THE ORIOLE if Mrs. Harden — Marvin says he just broke two of the best records in P. H. S. Mr. Harden — Great snakes, something else we have to pay for, I guess, like those glass jars that he broke in the laboratory last week. RONALD POWELL’S MOTTO “It is better to remain silent and be called a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.” Jeanette Ray — I read Alonzo’s “Ivanhoe,” didn’t you, Billy? Bill Cheves — No, I read Scott’s. Mr. Eckman (in chemistry class) — What is a precipitate? Alyne Hurd — Something that jumps down. Miss Finks — Jeanette, was the queen responsible for the king’s death? Jeanette Ray — Yes, because she married him. Alton (walking into Miss Fink’s room) — -Miss Finks, this is the coziest room I’ve been in yet. Alton (turning aside) — Now she will pass me on English. Every one laughed and Mr. Eckman asked what the joke was. John Cox — Ronald is married. Mr. Eckman Huh! I don’t think that’s any joke. William Allison — Is that stun- ning looking girl a teacher? Howard Gilmer — Yes, cer- tainly, her pupils are in her eyes. Mrs. Thomas (to Marion, coming down to breakfast late) — Did that young man kiss you last night? “Now, mother, do you sup- pose he came all the way from Bonsack to make eyes at the gold fish?” Tom Roberts, given to ad- miring the pretty girls of the city as they go down the street, found himself following one for them one sunny afternoon, hop- ing to get a glimpse of her face, Finally she turned, “Hello! Tom,” said his sister Virginia, smiling on him, “Better run home, dear, mother’s waiting for you.” June Hurd— I just put my hand on a hot iron; what must I do? Alyne Hurd — -Read Carlyle’s “Essay on Burns.” Mr. Eckman — What is space? Margaret Dyer — I have it in my head, sir, but I can’t explain it. John Cox — What is economy, father? Mr. Cox — Economy, my son, is a way of spending money without getting any fun out of it.
Page 102 text:
THE ORIOLE 92 2V 3lok pb Mr. Eckman- — John, what is the purest water known? John Cox — Rain water. Mr. Eckman — Why? John — Because it comes from above. OLD HOME TOWN Pauline Bopp — Hap, lend me your knife. Haswell Sizer (looking up about half asleep) — Huh, save my life? Mr. Eckman (in talking about carbon dioxide) — Sylvia, if the dampers of a stove were not properly adjusted, what would the fire do? Sylvia Byrd — Go out. Speaking of small things, Billy Cheves uses a boat turned sideways for a bath house. Miss Birdsong — Clarence, you and Livingston stop talking. Clarence Miller — What did you say? Livingston Sheppard — O h ! Clarence, run up there and see what she wants. Rhoda Sheppard — Why are you mailing all those empty envelopes? James Cummings — I am cut- ting classes in a correspondence school. Wesley Johnson — Miss Bird- song, may I go and see Mr. Brugh? Miss Birdsong — No. Wesley — I just want to give him something he’s not looking for. Tom Roberts — What? Wesley — My tuition. (In chemistry class) — Pauline — What kind of an atom does Pb r epresent? Alyne Hurd — Pauline Bopp. Mildred Carson to Louise Kirkner — Louise, have you read the “Last of the Mohicans?” Louise — d must confess I havent read the first of them yet. Mr. Eckman- — What do you do if you get acid on your clothes? Howard Gilmer — Patch ’em. Mr. Eckman (in chemistry class)- — What happens when oxy- gen and hydrogen unite? Marvin Harden — W hy-er- they mix. Mr. Eckman — What three words are used most in the class room? Louise Dudley — I don’t know. Mr. Eckman — Correct. Alonzo Carper (talking to “Hap” Sizer) — Mamie would be a pretty good teacher, if she knew any thing to teach.
Page 104 text:
THE ORIOLE “Baby” Haislip — Say, there’s a football player out here wants his picture taken. Photographer — Full face? “Baby” — No, half back. Marvin Harden — If potassium iodide would alcohol barium? Livingston Sheppard — N o , but dynamite. Miss Finks wrote on back of English paper, ‘‘Please write more legibly.” Joe Bones — What was that you wrote on my paper yester- day? Carl Bunts (disgusted at show) — Horse’s neck! Mary Draper — Do they? John Calfee — I am speaking for the future. Marshall Bassett — Yes, and if you don’t hurry up it’ll be here. Frances Mullins — I know a person who lives on onions alone. Margaret Dyer — Well, any one who eats onions ought to live alone. Miss Thomas (in history class) — Men spend half of their in- come for food and a sixth for clothes. Livingston Sheppard — Yes, I was just debating whether I would eat dinner today or go to the show tonight. Frank Jackson — What part of the body is the fray, Miss Finks? Miss Finks — Fray? What are you talking about? Frank — This book says Ivan- hoe was wounded in the fray. She — Whenever I see Gillie playing football, I imagine he is calling on me. He — Why, honey, does he make a football out of you? She — No, but he breaks through my interference. Lila Gilmer — Took at the man running away with the ball. Catherine Dudley — W ell, maybe he is tired playing. Lila — I’ll bet he’s sorry now; look at them pile on him. HEARD AT DRESSING Livingston Sheppard — These shoes are too small, damn it. I don’t believe I’ll ever get them on till I’ve worn them a spell. Charles Boley — What is the passing grade here, “D” isn’t it? George Crowder — Yeh, but last year I passed two courses with ‘‘ease.” Her eyes say, “Dear, I love you,” And I’d marry her, I would — But her lips, they say, “I seen her,” “I done” and “used to could.”
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