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Page 91 text:
GREAT TRUTHS “They satisfy”— A’s. “So easy to make”- D’s. “Stops pain instantly” — Bell at the end of class periods. “The girl you can’t forget” The one who got you kept in. “The greatest American an- nual ” — The Oriole. Anna Smith has the habit so bad that she stands up and shimmies for half an hour be- fore a bottle with the label on it, “Shake well before using.” Mr. Brugh, talking to Ernest Lewey’s father — What’s your little boy’s name? Mr. Lewey — Ernest Hallowed Lewey. Mr. Brugh — But where did you ever get Hallowed? Mr. Lewey — Why, the Bible says “Hallowed be thy name.” Three words that describe a man’s 1 i f e — hatched- -matched — dispatched. Sara Edmonds (to waiter at a restaurant) — Dinner for one, please. Waiter — Madam, we do not fill silos. ' t Gertrude Jennings says “Where there’s a will there’s a way.” Lillian Pack wants to know how the sun can rise if it never moves. Ernest Lewey — Gerard, where is Christmas Island? Gerard Southern — That i s where Santa Claus lives. MODERN SONNET When she stood up for to shimmy Her shake was so complete Cleopatra would have had to wiggle If she would Margaret Dyer beat. At Harris’ soda fountain. Mr. Harris — Something for you? Carl Bunts — Yes, I’d like to get a glass of exit that you are advertising in Dalton Theatre. Why is it that we — Cry over the movies? Say that Jonah swallowed the whale? Spell separate “seperate?” Get nervous over exams and pass ’em. Don’t get nervous over exams and flunk ’em? Argue about the League of Nations? Forget that we were ever Freshmen? Write such nonsense as this? Martha Derrick says that Mr. Eckman called on her five times in the past week, and to- day popped her the question, to which she answered “Yes.” Oh, la, la! But don’t worry — • it was only in French class. Roby Sutherland is calling on Lena Bones and Carl Bunts is hovering in the foreground of the living room. Lena (to Roby) — Well, I see that you have arrived. Roby (glancing at Carl) — I should say I have arrival.
Page 90 text:
Hfofeea Mr. Eckman (in Physics class) — Henry, what did we learn in last year’s Science class about Boyle’s law? Henry Foglesong (who came from Ceres, Va.) — I don’t know; I wasn’t here last year. •t Billy Cheves (running to his mother with a dead chicken) — Oh, mother, look at the goitre on this chicken’s neck. Miss Finks — Where is Gerard? Ernest Lewey- He has gone to Marion. Miss Thomas — W here is everybody? Billy Bones — Here I am. Mr. Draper — I was at Lake Side today. Mary — What did it look like? Mr. Draper It looked rather aquatic. Mary — It didn’t have any water in it, did it? Hap Sizer (looking for some small weights in Physics lab.) — Has anybody seen any young weights? Hamlet — To die — to sleep — to sleep, perchance to dream — ay, there’s the rub. Beveridge Roberts — To die — to sleep — to sleep, perchance to snore. “There are Don Juans and Beau Brummels, Spoken of in softest tones— But the one that’s mentioned these days Is the one they call Beau Jones. And if you’re seeking informa- tion About this gay Beau Jones Why, change the letters just a trifle And, behold! he is Joe Bones. Miss Chaffin — Well, Dean, how many algebra examples did you get right? Dean Creger — Just three. Miss Chaffin — Well, you cer- tainly are low down. Charles Gatewood — I want to do something clean before I die. George Crowder — Then take a bath. i ¥ % Bill Allison — I saw a house on fire yesterday and I hate the sight of fire. Alton Duncan — You’d better get used to fire, now. Alyne Hurd has the reputa- tion of throwing kisses like stringing chewing gum. Ernest Dalton stole a kiss from Anna Allison and tried to put it back.
Page 92 text:
Margaret Brewer (talking to Virginia Roberts) — I heard that Opal Grantham went visiting during the holidays but didn’t have a very good time. Virginia R. — But why not? Where did she go? M. B. (answering both ques- tions) — Wurno (were no) people there. Some students heard Miss Thomas express a wish for a good picture of Thomas Jefferson. Now she is deluged with 1-cent postcards. (Look on ’em your- self, if you don’t believe it.) Mr. Eckman — Now, Mamie, can you describe the earth’s atmosphere? Mamie — No, sir, it’s too dense. ( Mr. Farthing (to Anna Alli- son) — Miss Allison, do you like your pictures? Anna — No, for they are not near so pretty as I am. Margaret Dyer — Don’t you think Mr. Fred Seagle has a grave expression? Kathryn Snapp — Sure, isn’t that the proper kind for an undertaker to have? Beveridge Roberts — Class, you must have your pictures taken right away. Billy Bones (reminding some- one)- — Words of Beveridge — All remind us We must have our pictures took And departing leave behind us Just exactly how we look. Aline, talking to Daisy — Did you see the Marionette show? Daisy — Yes, you were in it were you not? (Aline must be some doll baby.) Mamie (wondering if Nannette is star gazing) — Nannette, what do you see? Nannette — I was just looking at Gi. Alice Lowman That’s too bad so few Seniors are going to the banquet. Sena Thompson — Oh, I don’t care, I’ll get more to eat. Sena Thompson — Mr. Far- thing says you shouldn’t pow- der your face when you have you picture made. Elizabeth M. — Why, Sena, what effect does it have? =1= Ansell D. — Say, Sprake, don’t you know I saw a green snake yesterday? Otis S. — Ugh! Good thing it wasn’t a ripe one. Miss Thomas — Billy, what is your ambition? Billy— To be a governor. Miss Thomas — And, Bever- idge, what is yours? B. Roberts — To be a gover- nor’s wife. Billy Bones- Miss Thomas, how old do you have to be be- fore you can be President? Miss Thomas — Thirty-five years, Billy. Daisy Nelson — I’m going home and tell my daddy he can be president.
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