Philadelphia High School for Girls - Milestone Yearbook (Philadelphia, PA)

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24 The Torch ' i i house in their efforts to enroll for the course, that it took all the efforts of Mary Bauzenberger, Dorothy Becker and Cecelia Field to keep them from crushing each other. We had only a few hours' time left, so we went to hear the greatest debate of the ages between two famous lawyers, Edith Diamond and Ruth Buroughs. The momentous question to be settled once and for all time was: Are Cater- pillars Nasty Things ? Muriel French was to be the judge. With bursts of eloquence and indignant protest and fiery enthusiasm, Ruth argued the negative. Equally eloquent, inspired and determined was Edith, a veritable Lady Burke, who, with ringing words, made it perfectly clear that caterpillars were indeed an intolerable nuisance and, by jingof' jolly well nasty things. Verily, they tickleth when they crawleth down one's back. As we made our way back to where. I had parked my cloudster,-for it was now high time we were Z,-:gs leaving-we met Geraldine McClintock, looking per- 4525353 fectly angelic, playing nurse to one of Dorothy Morti- miie 5 G07 more's offsprings while his Mamma was doing her t 'Q' shopping. 5 ' Come and I'll let you peep at someone you 3 haven't seen yetg we have only a moment, and Mar-- garet separated a thick hedge. I saw, among gorgeous Bowers and woody nooks, Angeline Christaldi, gazing I dreamily into space as she walked about courting the ' Muse of Poetry. Catherine Gantz, her ever-faithful iif'Fi g5i ' shadow, dogged her footsteps, writing furiously the gems that fell from Angel's inspired lips. Mar- THAT CATQRPQLLARS garet shook my shoulder to remind me that we really ARC A JO'-U NUISANCC5' must be going and, as it was near dinner time, I hop- ped into my cloudster and went home. EVA ZEITLIN. P. S. C by her classmatesj-Eva Zeitlin, the faithful recorder of this chronicle, was so thrilled by her visit to Starville that she decided to settle there permanently. We send to the Earth people this Radiogram to state that Starville and its Inhabi- tants, the greatest history of the age, written by the eminent historian, Eva Zeitlin, has just been published. Copies of the same are obtainable from the author for 1,000,000 marc-rubles.

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Record Number 23 Rose L. Friedman, Rebecca Weinberg, Ida VVeiss, and Anna Disney, had all become successful stenographers. Martha Schroeder had been sent to South America to represent a Starville business house that dealt in cocoanuts. By this time we had reached the theatre and, to our great disappointment, found that we were too late for the performance. My guide told me of the wonderful art exhibition now in full swing. At the Art Academy, we found an admiring throng gazing in awe at Moonshine, the prize picture, painted by Harriet Shilliday. Elsie Wilson and Betty Bender were also exhibitors. Eleanor VVignall was proudly telling the people who would listen Mathilde Touhseant one of the admir ing throngf fainted from sheer rapture oxer to her, that she had held Betty Bender's paints. Moonshine. We followed her to the Killern F 'RST PR' Z E Hospital to see that she was properly restored. V fff' fy' v There we found that she would be in very aff, rglx 5 ' V g capable hands indeed. Ella May Eastwick, VII? X' nj Pearl Katz, Eleanor Twohig, and Helen Yohn S5 , fj1:'j,,f1,Q: .- were nurses. Grace Rinard, they said, was HSUCH EXP RGSSIONV1 their star patient. Miriam Britsch, Frances Q m'WoN,,eRFU,-.1 Uprichard, and Lillian Vlfright were bacteri- 9 MARvcL0uS ologists and as a side-line dissected hearts to Sven T CCH N nque' find out if Crushitis left permanent scars on that organ. Fannie Lasensky, Mildred Baxter, and Eda Myers were the sure geons and house physicians. They boasted that but 856 of every 10 people they doctored succumbed. Edith McKeith was an eminent brain specialist. She held a special clinic for children who professed to be unduly fond of Latin. Dr. McKeith diagnosed such cases as enlarged growth of the Latinoidus, an organ situated ini the northeast corner of the southwest Spindifiex-Maximus. Near the Killem Hospital ffor obvious reasonsj, Mildred Quinn taught the gentle, soothing art of boxing, to refined young ladies. Elizabeth Reamer and Esther Rubin had graduated, after many battles. from mere pupils to qualified assistants. Annie Jessup, Sarah Palm, and Edith Napier, scientists and' inventors, had were due, for which service they received the undying love of thousands of poor, Evelyn Weinstein, Margaret Stevenson, and Lillian V elenchik, who had all Bauzenberger, Dorothy Becker, and Cecelia Field to keep them from crushing Equally eloquent, inspired. and determined with Edith. a veritable Lady Burke, Annie Jessup, Sarah Palm and Edith Napier, scientists and inventors, had invented a machine that automatically wrote-up note books the night before they were due, for which service they received the undying love of thousands of poor, oppressed high school students. They also invented an instrument that detected whether a teacher meant playfully to spring a test on one. They were working on a creaseless, soilless middy for the exclusive use of high school girls. Evelyn Weinstein, Margaret Stevenson and Lillian Velenchik, who had all grown alarminrgly thin, gave a popular course in How to Reduce in One Month Without D'ieti1'zg or Exercise. So dense were the crowds that surrounded the

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Record Number PRE SIDENT GRPRESID S 4 T SRCRETA? QEASUREQ BIABEI. EDXVARDS GRACE ROBERTS CL.-xR.-x Bnormsm CLASS OFFICERS LENORE WITZEMANN