Oakwood Collegiate Institute - Oracle Yearbook (Toronto Ontario, Canada)

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have lost what little reason, if any, they have! Pardon me while I take a cough drop. I seem to have lost my voice and I must pause while it comes back to me. tDei Suprie pa! Turn that guy off and get the play-by-play on the fights or something good ......... click.l Receipt for a Kiss. 1. To a piece of dark piazza, add two persons, whose names are of masculine and feminine genders. 2. Add a measure of moonlight. 3. Press into two strong arms. -1. Sift lightly with 12 ounces of attraction and one of romance. Add a measure of folly, stir in a floating ruffle, and two or three whispers. 6. Dissolve one or two glances in a well of silence. T. Dust with an ounce of resis- tance and two of yielding. 8. Place the kiss firmly on burn- ning lips, then cool on a smooth cheek. J.W. 5B did this No phone or mail orders please Visiting Hours Ill p.m.-1 a.m. Freshettesl Remember what Aesop said: -Laugh and the world laughs with you, -Cry and you streak your rouge. Fendlay '28: Was the fire drill successful 'Z Thomson '28: Well say! I got to know two smart second form las- sies on the way out. To prove: His love. Construction: Take any couple in love. Let them be John and Mary. Proof: John is a man, and he is a man. therefore he equals John. Similarly Mary is a woman and you are a woman, therefore you equal Mary. Substitute equal values in the first equation and we get he loves vou. 5- THE OAKWOOD ORACLE Gord says he always preferred a knot of soft dark lustrous fem- inine hair to a neck like a nail brush. If Oakwoodites Ran The Police Force Brodie '28: tarrested for speed- ing on a windy dayj-Officer there goes my hat, may I go after it '? Fenlon '28: Ha ha, my lad, you don't catch me so easily. You'd soon beat it. You stay right here -I'll run after it. Ranta '29: I've got a terrible toothache. Don Ritchie '30: Why don't you do, what I do. When I get a tooth- ache I go right over to my girl's place. She puts her arms around my neck, kisses me, smooths my forehead and I forget all about the toothache. Why don't you try it '? Ranta: I sure will. Is your girl home now? Hugh: You really love me Mabel '? Mabel: Why of course, Ralph. Hugh: Ralph? My name's Hugh! Mabel: Oh goodness I keep think- ing this is Monday. Lies slumbering here One, Emily Bright, She put out her left hand And turned to the right. Scotch Birthday Card Birthday greetings, lassie, Merry Christmas, too, Happy New Year, Easter gladness All I speed to you. Incidently t'would be fine, If you'd be my Valentine. Latest Song Hit: The Litmus Blues -by Mr. Kirby-The tune's not much-but oh! the air! Davidson '29: What always come in pairs? Stephenson '29. Scissors '? Davidson: No, Pear seeds. Page Seventy-fiz'c

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THE OAKWOOD ORACLE Qntbungfs Svpeerb Ladies and gentlemen. this pro- gram is coming to you over station S.P.Q.ll.. owned and operated by the Alabaster Paving Stone Co., Ill-1 Appian Way. Mr. Anthony B. Smith. through the courtesy of the l'nited Olive Seed Removers Inc. of llome, Italy, will deliver the next speech, Mr. Smith. Friends. Romans, Countrynieni Lend me your earphones-CI might say at this time that this program through the courtesy of the U.O. S.II. is in coimnemoration of the re- cent death of Mr. G. J. Caesar, a prominent citizen of this beautiful city of yours.j I come to bury Caesar. not to praise him, because the Public Health Commission has complained against leaving the body uninterred any longer. The eyil that men do lives after them, as one can easily see by reading the April number of the Lurid Con- t'ession's Magazine, on sale at most news stands. The noble Brutus hath told you that Caesar was ambitious. Brutus is a senator, and anyone who has been following the recent investi- gation in the Senate concerning the graft made on the chariot races will known how much Brutus' word is worth. However that may be, here un- der leave of Brutus and the rest lor rather under the sponsorship oi' the United Olive Seed Removers lnc.J come I to speak in Caesar's funeral, which by the way is the most gorgeous and expensive fun- eral with which the Senate has ever honoured one of its members. He was my friend, faithful and just to me. Often did he lend me money and procure through his influence with the promoters, seats in the most desirable section of the Colos- seum. liut llrutus says he was ambitious: and Brutus is an hon- ourable man, that is if a lying Page .S'r'1'1 Iliff-fifllll' cheating, sneaking politician may be called honourable. You are listening P.Q.R., broadcasting Smith's 'after dinner the banquet in commemoration of the recent death of Mr. G. J. Cae- sar, late of this city. Stand by, please. He QM1: G. J. Caesarl hath brought many captives home to Rome, and hath charged great sums for seats at the trials in the Senate Chamber, which revenue did the general coffers fill. Did this 111 Caesar seem ambitious? Yet Brutusf and by the way Brutus has owed me fifteen shekels since a year ago last Ides of January,J says he was ambitious. You all did see that on the Supercal I thrice present.ed him a kmgly crown which he did thrice refuse. -Listen folks, that was Just a clever little publicity stunt 211'1'anged by some newspaper men and Caesar had nothing whatever to do with it. Yet Brutus says, for the fourth time, he was ambitious. At this point I would like to an- nounce that as a result of certain investigations, it has been discov- ered that a well-known news sheet has paid Brutus 50,000 lires each time he makes this statement, which is utterly unfounded concern ing Caesar's ambition. I speak not to disprove what Brutus spoke, be- cause I don't consider his opinion of the slightest valueg but here I am to speak what I think will do Caesar's cause most good. You all did love him once, not without cause, for did he not make vast campaign speeches before his elect- ion? Did he not put through the bill providing for reopening of the Public Bar? And did he not estab- lish a municipal play ground and golf course on the Palatine Hill? I ask you. O judgment! Thou are fled to brutish beasts and men to station S. Mr. Anthony speech from

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THE OAKWOOD ORACLE .......... .... ................................... Q For a Guaranteed Job in French Cleaning' -'l'rv ELLIOTT CLEANERS 769 sm. Clair w. l3................................................................................ Doris Mcliindleyz So, he's an ex- perienced lover T Ruth Lundy: Well he can tell in- stantly whether you are pensive or sleepy. Hangy Owens: Come on, let's play house. -One GUQSS-I Oh it's such a k1d's game. Hank : Not the way I play it! 4You were rightl: Huh! Well, you be the door and I'll slam you. mm 4 ninmumin-menunnununuunuuuuunmunnnuunnnu annumnnmmnunmum Hill. 5081-5082 ll lllll lulllllnlnllln nlnlllnunlll I u In uululllnulullnl lnnln unlnnnn -lil Mr. Kirby: What is the differ- ence between ammonia and pneu- monia? Small boy: One comes in bottles, the other in chests. Weary Editor: Where did you get these jokes '? One of the eight contributors: Out of the air. Weary Editor: And yet Mr. Dunkley still insists that we have a good ventilation system. E TUDY Bl INEEE' : The largest incomes in every city are earned by men and women trained : 2 in ISLSINIGSS. TRAINED young people are constantly needed to fill good E . business positions. Competent students are readily placed. 1 Our practical courses in Stenography, Bookkeeping, Commercial Private : 1 Secretarial, and French-English Stenography, prepare for better positions : : and higher pay. Hundreds of former Dominion students testify to the value and importance of the thorough business training received here. An exclusive feature of the Dominion is the fact that a high school : : student may complete any part of his Matriculation in our ltlatriculation De- : E partinent while pursuing a business course. Commercial French is another 1 5 advantage, open to high school graduates. . A copy of our illustrated catalogue will gladly be sent upon request. : 2 .lust 'phone Trinity 2663. Dominion Business College, Limited Z 525 Bloor Sl. Wea-it Iii u-nm-ui-numumnnmuun in Ijfljll' .S'4f1'r'flfg1-sf.i' J. V. Mitchell, Bark., Principal 5 ....... E7